California Info

California Divorce Start Your Divorce Find Professionals California Articles Divorce Facts Divorce Grounds Residency Divorce Laws Legal Separation Property Division Alimony Child Custody Child Support Divorce Forms Process Service Grandparent Rights Forum California Products Divorce by County

California Articles

Agreements Attorney Relationship Custody & Visitation Child Support Collaborative Law Counseling Divorce/General Domestic Abuse Domestic Partnership Financial Planning Foreign Divorce Mediation Parenting Property Division Spousal Support SEE ALL

Info Categories

Contemplating Divorce Children & Divorce Divorce, Dollars & Debt Divorce Laws Divorce Process Divorce Negotiation SEE ALL

More Information

Articles Checklists Research Center Cases of Interest Dictionary Encyclopedia Encyclopedia (pop-up) Blogs

For Professionals

Advertise With Us Free Network Page Join Our Network Submit Articles Sign In

Network Sites

California Divorce Support California Divorce Online

Holy Fatrimony!! Does Marriage Make Us Fat?

Cheating with Oscar Meyer? Loving up to Sara Lee? Read why one couple decided on divorce - for a seemingly unconventional reason!

Joyce Parker and Jeff O'Paller were married seven years when more that the proverbial itch provoked them to divorce courts. "It had nothing to do with love but everything to do with survival," sighed the 38 year old executive coach. "We became obese. When I met Joyce I weighed 165 pounds! She gained 80 pounds during our marriage and more weight after each baby!" After only seven years, matrimony became fatrimony, with the former marathon runner adding 96 pounds to his 6 foot frame. "I suffered all kinds of physical problems," he laments. "I didn't know what to do short of bariatric surgery... So then I made the toughest decision of my life: and I ended my marriage. I lost all the weight and began running again, and the best part? I met a pediatric heart surgeon and she really keeps me in line!"

Wedlock But No Bedlock?

The phenomenon of weight gain during wedlock really has some researchers frustrated and perplexed. Why, for example, is there a 6 to 10 pound weight gain in the first year of marriage than single people? The University of North Carolina studies confirm that young adults are especially vulnerable to weight gain and that this kind of weigh is "socially contagious." Any reason? "Possibly because marriage is viewed as comforting and soulful," muses Dr. Jake Palletz, a counseling psychologist in Memphis, who specializes in premarital counseling. "The family that eats together stays together. Many of my patients who come to see me before marriage are svelte and a few years later, boom! They're complaining of a dismal sex life and lethargy and voila! It's obvious their weight gain has something to do with their enervated state."

Penny Gordon-Larsen, an assistant professor of nutrition at the school of public health at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill conducted research on people who became obese - more than 202 pounds over a healthy weight -- increases significantly from teens to young adulthood. Nori Belle-Canataba, a marriage and family therapist in Las Vegas voices the phenomenon "that it could be anything in the shared environment or home. When families, especially with children, eat together, they tend to finish the children's food, have seconds, or just eat congenially while everyone else eats whether they're hungry or not just because they're at the table or especially while cooking. Before they know it they've gained five pounds, then eight, then 10... it never ends until they end the compulsive eating."

Interestingly, women who cohabitated gained more weight than single women but less than married. "Of course when out in the dating world, you want to remain desirable but many maintain the attitude within marriage that my spouse will love me for who I am, but what they fail to realize is that your spouse fell in love with you for who you are and were - if you were slender, attractive to them. The difference between friends and lovers is an unalterable attraction and desire. Anything else will keep you friends," reminds Dr. Palletz. In other words, "treat your spouse with the same respect and reverence you would a dating partner. Would you come to the door with curlers in your hair and a bathrobe or unshaven and unkempt Probably not. Grant your spouse the same respect."

Keep The Weight Off - Together

"This is a perfect time to demonstrate dedication and togetherness," says Nori. Some great ideas include:

  • Walking or jogging together. "Get out of the house and get moving," says Nori.
  • Adopt a pet and walk it together. On the average, a person with a pet weighs seven pounds less than the individual who does not own one.
  • Exercise with your children. This is a terrific way to teach them healthy habits.
  • Do not believe you need to feed starving children in Africa by stuffing yourself. "You know this an old habit that dies hard," says Nori, "but do yourself a favor and kill this one."
  • See a registered dietician or physician if you've really gone overboard.
  • There's no shame in asking for help and if you really need to shed pounds and cannot do it yourself, seek help from your physician. He or she will have resources for you.

But try not to do what Joyce and Jeff did. "If there were other issues in their relationship that is another story, but what they did was tantamount to desperation," proclaims Dr. Palletz.


Was this helpful? Like our site & let us know.

Related Articles


Start California Divorce Start Your California Online Divorce Today
Easy, Fast and Affordable with a 100% Guarantee.
California Divorce Find California Divorce Professionals in Your Area:
Join the Network
California Divorce Products, Services and Solutions California Divorce Products, Services and Solutions
California Divorce Resources to Help You Through the Process.
Divorce and Custody Books Discount Divorce Bookstore
Over 100 Titles of the Best Books on Divorce & Custody.
Divorce Downloads Divorce Download Center
Instantly Download, Books, Manuals, & Forms.
Divorce Worksheet Free California Divorce Worksheet & Separation Agreement
Your Guide to Get Organized and Put Everything in Writing.
   
To file for divorce, one spouse must have lived in California for the last six months, and the county where the action is filed for the last three months. Spouses who have lived in California for at least six months, but in different counties for at least three months can file in either county. These California residency requirements must be met in order for the court to have jurisdiction of the case.
Divorce Lawyers & Mediators
 

Find Professionals

Easily Connect With a Lawyer or Mediator
Have Divorce Professionals from Your Area Contact You!
Enter Your Zip Code:

 

Start Your Divorce File for a California Divorce

 

Settle Your Divorce Negotiate Your California Divorce

 

Support Forum California Support Forum


FEATURED TOOL - PensionAppraisalDeskTM (Determine the Present Value of Your Retirement Account Online)


Limited Offer Women's Rights Manual For Divorce
Cover Price: $55.95
Your Price: $29.95
You Save: $26.00

"The Absolute Best Investment in Your Divorce"

Men's Rights Manual For Divorce
Cover Price: $55.95
Your Price: $29.95
You Save: $26.00

"Uncover Your Options and Unleash Solutions"