When we write about divorce and children switching homes, most of the time the focus is on the children: what it is like for them and how to help them make smooth transitions. We forget to address the needs of the parents who are left alone at home in an empty house once the children are gone. We forget that it is often harder for the parents being left behind than it is for the children who are going to the other parent's house. It may be difficult for you when your children leave for the other parent's home for a variety of reasons: you may feel lonely, you may miss the children, you may be jealous of circumstances in the other home (a new family, a larger home, etc.), or you may not like your spouse and wish the children didn't have to be with him or her at all.

Sometimes the best thing you can do for your children is help yourself cope better. Then you can free up your energy to really focus on what your children need. And you will be less likely to impose on them your own concerns and negative feelings.