If the answer is, "No", then we talk about the benefits of doing that. As anyone who has been through it can tell you, divorce is a stressful, life-changing process. Think about it, you are dividing all of your worldly possessions and beginning a new and different relationship with your children. Life doesn't get any more stressful than that!

Even folks who come to us having worked out all of the legal details of how to divide property and how to create a plan to care for their children have been through the devastating process of ending a relationship that they thought at one point would last forever.

If your marriage is at a place where you are even thinking of consulting a divorce attorney, you should be talking to someone about the emotional changes in your life. Obviously the best choice is an experienced mental health professional. If you don't know one, your lawyer can recommend someone. If you cannot afford one, you may look to a religious institution or other social service agency for free or financially assisted support. If you don't want to do that, have some deep conversations with a personal friend or a brother or sister.

Bottom Line: A marriage breakup is hard on you. You don't have to go through it alone.

(copyright Stann Givens 2009)