It usually is no more complicated than any other divorce, particularly if both spouses are in the United States.

The pain and suffering of a divorce in the military are no different than those in civilian life. Let’s say a women and her military spouse have separated, and she wants to divorce him. He says that it wouldn’t be fair to divorce him now, while he’s serving the nation, and wants to know why they can’t just stay separated. In short, he does not want the divorce; she does. In this sense, the divorce is no different than any divorce where one spouse wants out and the other does not.

The argument that it wouldn’t be fair to divorce him while he is in uniform doesn’t stand up. It is no more unfair to divorce someone in the military than it is unfair to divorce someone who is not. When one spouse wants to end a marriage and the other does not, in military or civilian life, fairness means very little.