A lot of people, myself included, get their information about various subjects (what is this “new math” on my kid’s homework sheet or how to treat a sprained calf muscle) from the internet. But not all information you glean applies to all situations. For example, as divorce mediators, we often get calls asking about how to get a legal separation, because the client read about it online. While some states allow couples to have a legal separation either prior to or instead of a divorce, New Jersey does not. In New Jersey, the state views you as either married or divorced or - there is one little loophole - Divorce from Bed and Board. But this loophole may be closing for more and more people.

Divorce from Bed and Board allows a person to live a separate life, especially financially, while technically still being married. In the past it was a way to get a divorce without technically getting a divorce, if it was against your religious beliefs to do so. In more recent times, people used this option not so much for religious reasons but because it allows you to still be able to carry health insurance to your “sort of ex-spouse but technically still your spouse”.

Because you are still legally married when you opt for Divorce from Bed and Board, most likely you can continue to provide health insurance to your spouse through your employer. This avoids COBRA (which you can have for a maximum of 36 months) or self-insurance, both of which can be cost prohibitive, after a divorce. But some insurance companies are catching on to the loophole and no longer allow you to carry your spouse on your insurance plan if you choose Divorce from Bed and Board. It is best to check into your specific insurance plan when considering your plans for divorce.

So, if you are looking for expert information about the realistic options when you are unhappy in your marriage, call a divorce mediator and get the correct information straight from the horse’s mouth. The internet can be a great source for finding the answer to a homework problem or how to treat your latest ailment, but when if come to important decisions about your future, call a divorce mediator as a source of valid options.