Under North Carolina family laws, any parent of a minor child, relative, or third party can file a civil suit to obtain custody of a child. The exception to this law is a child’s biological father convicted of raping and impregnating the mother. Should the custody be contested, both parties are ordered by the court to go through mediation sessions at no cost.

During mediation, involved parties will try to agree on terms regarding child custody and visitation rights. Before parents can proceed to the litigation process, they have to attend at least one session of mediation. Mediation can be waived by the court for good cause, such as allegations of neglect or abuse of the child by one party, or a party’s undue hardship.

Each mediation proceeding is deemed confidential and a mediator is not allowed to testify as a witness for any party in court. If an agreement is reached during mediation, the written custody agreement is submitted to the court for approval. The mediated agreement gets court approval most of the time unless the court "finds good reason not to". If an agreement is reached in mediation, the mediator does not provide written reports or recommendations of any kind to the court. Only the final written child custody agreement leaves the mediator’s office.

If the parties are not able to reach an agreement through mediation, a court trial is conducted and custody is awarded to the party whom the court deems more capable of promoting the child’s best interests and welfare. When determining child custody, the court does not automatically favor the mother over the father. It does however consider any allegations of domestic violence of one party either against the child or against the other party.

In North Carolina, the court has broad discretion to award sole or joint physical and sole or joint legal child custody. In a joint physical custody ruling, it is not a requirement that the child spend the same amount of time with each parent. If the ruling is for joint legal custody both parents are then allowed to equally take part in making decisions over matters that can affect the child, such as medical care and education. Since child support requires a separate legal proceeding from custody proceedings, the parent awarded custody does not automatically receive child support from the other parent.

The court may state in the custody order that the child can be taken by a parent outside of North Carolina. The parent taking the child away from state may be required by the court to post a bond to ensure the child’s safe return at the expected time. Grandparents’ visitation rights may also be awarded if it’s in the best interest of the child. Under the guidelines directed by the court, visitation rights are often also supplemented by electronic communication such as phone and computer.