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An Outline for Taking Charge of Your Divorce
You and your attorney
  • Hiring
  • Working with
  • Following advice
  • Remember who is the employer and who is the employee

Objectives
  • Best outcome
  • Reasonable outcome
  • Worst case outcome

Strategies
  • Develop an overall plan
  • Prepare your offense
  • What is your defense

Organization
  • Inventory of assets and liabilities
  • Documents and summaries for your attorney
  • Request for production
  • Interrogatories
  • Bullet points

Dealing with soon to be ex-spouse
  • "When in doubt, take the high road out"
  • Do not say or do anything that you do not want to see on the front page of the newspaper or all over the internet
  • Be reasonable
  • Do not discuss the past
  • Direct conversations to the future

Expect the unexpected
  • From your soon to be ex-spouse
  • From your spouse's attorney
  • From a time stand point
  • From the Court system
  • From the result

After the Judge says "you are divorced"
  • Read the Decree - before it is signed and re-read after it is signed
  • Change beneficiaries
  • Be prepared to do things by yourself for yourself
  • Forgive and forget?
  • Are you disabled?
  • Building a new life


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Before the divorce is final, the court may issue temporary orders to deal with immediate problems, such as conservatorship, possession, child support, and spousal support/alimony. Temporary orders can say who will live in the home, who will be able to write checks on the bank accounts, and who will have control of the children up until the divorce is final and permanent orders are put in place. In most cases, depending on the court, the spouses will be ordered to mediation prior to any hearing on temporary orders. Mandatory mediation helps lessen the case load at the court and helps the parties resolve issues without a court ruling.
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