[color:blue] [/color] I have been married for 16 years. It has taken me this long and several years of therapy to realize that I have been in a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship. My "husband" has controlled every aspect of my life up until now. He is In Korea and can't have the control he wants. As a result of this my eyes have been opened to how my life has been. I am sitting here tonight thinking did I waste 16 years of my life? I never went to college because he said that we had to have the money to go first and he wanted to get his degree before I got mine. Well he left and I took it into my own hands and started back to school finally I am living up to the dreams that he stomped on from the begining. I am terrified to talk to him because everytime I do he starts yelling at me and belittleing me and my feelings. I am so tired of being a door mat. I have noticed that my 12 yr old son is starting to talk to me like im stupid as well. I cannot live like this anymore. I am so afraid to file for a divorce I am even more afraid to tell him that I am doing it. I don't know how to go about any of this. If there is anyone willing to give me advice I would greatly appriciate it. I keep gett the while im gonna change and then he does for a week or so and then right back to the way he was. He has even decided that he feels that he raped me off and on through out our marriage. He asked me if I felt that he did and I had. Being to afraid to stand up to him I would give in weather I wanted it or not.Any time I would "stand my ground" he would talk AT me (not to me) and yell until I changed my mind. I know this isn't healthy and I need to get out while I can for my sake and my sons. I am just lost I don't know where to start. Please help me if you can. Thank you in advance.
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16 years thrown away?