| RJ1 |
| (Carpal \'Tunnel) |
| 11/20/11 04:27 PM |
Re: Oh boy! Dad is taking us to dinner. (vent)
|
Yes, EM. I know. I keep thinking that. I have many, many years before that happens(I hope).
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My son is 11 and things have changed drastically between him and his Dad. I guess his Dad taking him on a drug deal was the beginning (Mom, Dad took me to the ghetto and it was dark and he left me alone in the truck and I was scared and he had a GUN and MONEY!!!). And then when his Grandparents moved away my ex became homeless and started living with his boss briefly. My son would tell me his Dad would stay in their basement the entire time while my son stayed on the couch and mostly hung out with that family instead of his Dad. One of those weekends my son didn't have anything to eat for an entire day. Never a bath or a change of clothes while with his Dad. His boss fired him and kicked him out and God knows where he is now.
His Dad never calls, although he has the fanciest phone money can buy. It's been two months since my son has seen or heard from his Dad. They haven't had a full weekend together since the beginning of the summer. This Friday was the first time I didn't call ex to ask him if he was coming or not. One reason is when I told my son it was his Dad's weekend he had a come apart and refused to talk about it and strongly said he was not going. Still no word from ex. His Dad never shows to any school function. He hasn't paid child support in almost five years. When ex was coming to get him, within five minutes of entering my house my ex and son were arguing. When my ex had nowhere else to go and I let him stay on my couch for a weekend, my Dad was beside himself about ready to kick his butt.
My son has it ALL figured out. He even whispered to me that they had a session at school on meth. His eyes were big and wide...I believe he's seen his Dad doing meth.
This has just about made me sick. I cry a lot. My heart is broken for my son. I worry. I stay in bed a lot. I finally went to my doctor and spelled it out. Among lots of stressors in my life he recognized, doc pointed out single parenthood second and my ex first. No doubt. Celexa and Xanax have been wonderful.
My son deserves so much more than what he gets. They figure it out though. Getting a "break" is the least of my worries. I have made friends with the grandparents who has custody of one of my son's friends. We both help each other. Wonderful folks and I feel so blessed to have found them. My older friends are great too. My family. Not sure what I would do without them all.
I hope things work out for you SRS. This is stuff that breaks hearts for sure.