| cracked |
| (recently joined) |
| 09/26/09 10:52 AM |
How to minimize the guaranteed damage?
|
Im married 4 years in the next month. I have 4 kids. all 4 and under. Twins in the middle.
My story is as complicated and, I image, common as any divorce story. Here I will say the problems were with both of us. We shouldnt have gotten married, but we did for the first kid. Twins after, then a baby on top of that. We are four kids deep and life isnt working.
We have a good family as far as the kids are concerned, but there is nothing but friendship between my wife and I. A good friendship, we work together on this family, but passion and tenderness and fun and joy..There hasnt been for a long time. not before our first kid.
I want a divorce. We've spent so much time on trying. I feel incredibly selfish, but this life is crushing me. I feel like we both deserve so much more. I've been through the arguments over staying for the kids or not. I want out of this.
My wife will be hurt, though she is seeing it coming. We've talked, though not as serious as we should now. I believe she thinks its worth staying for the kids.
What is the process? I am being told every where that I should go to counseling first. I feel in a way that this is unfair to her. To make her go through these steps as if I was trying to work on the problems. I'm done working on them.
She gets the house, she gets the car. she gets all my money for alimony and CS. Ok fine. If I dont go bankrupt, I'll manage. I'm prepared for that.
do I have to call a lawyer?