Just depends, the retirement is considered property, and she can be awarded a percentage of it regardless of the amount of service. If you never complete 20, she gets that percentage of zero. If you go back in later, and complete 20 years, she is still entitled. Getting out and going back in will not solve your problem. The only way to do that would make sure there is no award of your retiremnt in the property settlement. If you tell her you are getting out, and she does not request it in the settlement then chances are she will not be able to bring it back up. It is possible though. The only way to make sure, iron clad is to have it in the settlement where she agrees to not take it.
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Re: wife filing, should I stay in or get out?