| alas |
| (recently joined) |
| 08/06/06 02:22 PM |
Re: Looking for answers and hope
|
Hello Nancy, Debi & Nrvouswrk!
Many thanks to you all for the words of encouragement and ideas. I feel better already for having posted my story to "the world" so to speak. It is there for anyone to read so I guess it's fitting. I've found that just putting the words down in black and white helps me see the things that I shouldn't be doing, allowing the things to happen to me that I am allowing and most of all, if this were the writing of someone else, I could think of a million things to say to this person about the hurt and humiliation these actions could cause. Sadly, for most of us, it's easier to give advice than it is to take it, especially when it's our own.
Nrvouswrk - as far as college goes, I'm looking into that. At this time I am in the running for a new job that I have been waiting for-for several months. I have already been through the initial phone interview and am waiting to see if I get the personal interview, which they will be starting this week. I feel I have as good of a chance as anyone, with 15 1/2 yrs experience in the field and it's a great, stable company to work for, excellent benefits and fairly good pay with room to move up. They also offer tuition reimbursement, which is what I plan on taking advantage of if hired. I'd like to go back and get my Bachelors in Business. At my previous job, they offered college courses right there at work, Mon & Tues eve. I started with one class and ended up doing the entire degree. My company paid for my ASS in Supervisory Management. It took me 5 years, but the credits I've acquired are transferable to the bachelors and heck, who wouldn't take the free education?? It truly was a life saver for me to be involved in the learning process again, the on-going challenges and having been out of school for 25 years, just to go back and know that I could still learn and finish with a GPA of 3.89 was the most amazing thing for me. I felt I was really worth something, that I really wasn't a dumb as my ex had me believing and that I could do anything! Once I put my mind to it. Knowing all of this has helped rebuild my self esteem and self worth, and am hoping all works out to be able to continue forward along that path. That's really about the only way I could afford to go back to school at this point.
As far as a roommate goes, it's possible, but unlikely. I live 25 miles from the "city" and most people don't want to rent that far out of town. I love it out here, love the privacy, the solitude and my space. I do have a semi finished basement that would make a pretty decent living space for someone, however, it would cost a small fortune to replace the windows to make them egress code and I think I'd have to put another exit in somehow. I did check into that some time ago. So at this time, it's not feasible.
I have put the word out for horse boarding. I have about 10 acres of good pasture and have experience with the business, but so far, with all the other horse people around, there hasn't been anyone in need.
I really like this idea of internet chats, it's fun to be able to communicate with others. It feels safe and is very comforting.
Can I ask where any of you are from? Or is that a no-no?
I do tend to chat up a storm sometimes, and for that I apologize. I get very lonely out here and it just feels good to have people to converse with. It's just who I am.
Please feel free to tell me to "shut-up" or keep it shorter if need be, I will not be offended.
Thanks again to you all. Your thoughts and input are sincerely appreciated.
P.S. I like the list idea. I had one once...not sure what happened to it, but I'm sure it wouldn't fit into the "new" life that I need to create for myself so it's time to start a new one! Thanks for the reminder!