CiCi
(addict)
08/05/07 08:21 AM
Aching heart

So....my daughter has been out in CA with her father all week. Things have been stellar for her - she's been upbeat and positive every day that I've spoken with her....they are having fun (disney land dad, ya know). There are, however, two issues - one that pissed me off and the other that's breaking my heart!!!

On Wednesday, I called my daughter at 10:00 a.m. and she said that her dad went to work and that she was in his apartment waiting for him to get back. Now, it's in our decree that he may NOT leave her alone while she is in CA visiting him. He lives in a not-so-good (alright, bad) neighborhood and I don't have the benefit of knowing anything about the place, so I don't have a comfort level. My daughter begged me not to make an issue out of it with her dad because she felt OK about it. I'm trying to respect her wishes - because I don't want her to stop telling me things. It's negotiating that fine line, ya know, to not lay into him because she's working it out herself. In my mind, the a$$ hole didn't take vacation time to be with his daughter because he's either saving it for the chick or he's used it all up during his trips to South America to be with the chick. Either way, I'm very angry about this and if it happens again (if my daughter continues to tell me about it), I won't send her out there anymore!

She called me at midnight last night and she was bawling and saying that she wanted to come home. After I calmed her down a bit, she said that her dad had been on the phone for 3 hours w/ his chick in South America and that it was bothering her. As I was trying to talk to her, apparently, he noticed that she was crying and wanted to talk to her, so she and I hung up so that they could "resolve" the issue.

You guys....I cannot tell you how much my heart aches when she cries like that. My immediate instinct was to act like a fierce momma bear protecting her cub and if he was in sight, I would have ripped his head off for hurting my baby. I just really, deeply believe that she deserves as much grieving time as we do and how dare he shove this in her face! Everything I do in life factors in my daughter and every decision I make causes me to think about what my actions will mean to others - especially her. Why isn't he the same way? OK, I know that not everyone is the same, but it INFURIATES me that people are so SELFISH. I'm not saying he can't talk to his chick, but why can't he wait until the daughter is sleeping?

AUGH...maybe I'm being a control freak; maybe I'm being over protective; maybe I'm just being a woman scorned. Any way ya slice it....my heart is aching!!!

I haven't spoken to her yet today...I'll keep you updated. Thanks for listening.



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