| Debi |
| (Carpal \'Tunnel) |
| 08/05/07 05:15 PM |
Re: My vent
|
I don't put all men in the same box and expect the same from each one. I don't wear my scars like a badge and think about all of the things my x SO did to hurt me. (my divorce is so far in the past that I've completely moved on from that) It's only when I get hurt again that I re-examine them.
Here are a few examples. I fell in love last fall, we talked about marriage, talked about where we wanted to get married, looked at rings and then my birth control failed and I never heard from him after I told him. Then there was a man I dated briefly last summer. It was a very casual thing and not at all intimate. Since then he has contacted me 3 seperate times after not hearing from him for awhile. The 2nd time was early spring shortly after I found out I was pregnant. I was very upfront about it and he really didn't care. He still wanted to see me. A few weeks later I got an e-mail telling me someone else he dated had come back in his life and he was confused but wanted to persue things with her. No problem, I simply left him alone. A few weeks ago he contacted me again. It didn't work out with this other woman, he couldn't believe he was so stupid but was glad he had such a good friend in me that he could talk to about anything. We went out last weekend and 2 days later I got an e-mail telling me he didn't want to casually date or be friends with anyone. He wants a lover. I wrote back and told him I wished him the best of luck in his search and that I was sorry he didn't want a friend but that he is well aware I'm in no position either physically or emotionally to be anyone's lover. In a few months when he contacts me I won't be answering him again. Most of the other men I've dated or even talked to do seem to only want one thing and I guess they figure since I'm a lonely single mom I'll give it to them. Not going to happen.
I still don't think all men are alike. I KNOW there are good ones out there, but I already know that I will welcome fewer of them into my life from now on because I will be a lot more cautious about trusting or caring about anyone.