all2u
newbie
Reged: 12/20/06
Posts: 28
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[quote]>>>>>Then you ask why so many men evade the court after a divorce and become what they call "Dead Beat Dads" or commit suicide just before, during or after a divorce!
I guess it's also why people wonder why so many women set the beds on fire that their husband's are sleeping in. At least it's probably something Chrystal Brames wondered before her police officer husband murdered her, after she repeatedly begged for help and no one would help her because he had all the connections.
Don't stereotype. ( THANKS MOM )
As for what's going on, you just have to get attention brought to it. They're one little county in a huge country. If local won't help, go outside that, and keep going. Try smaller issues that would be interested in ANY news story and work your way up. Keep writing your state Senators and Congressmen. Write the President. [/quote]........................................................................................................................................................................... Ok, Just for the record! I never said at any point that there were not women out there in just as bad even worse situations. Nor did I imply that! Why is there always someone looking for a Negative to pull out of a conversation? I personally was an abused woman, almostheaven and I lived The Burning Bed, with a different outcome. So I do know the issues there, this is not about those issues. Robert Jernigan is NOT accused of any type of abuse to her or his children. It has never been mentioned , nor has it even been raised. This post is about his being held, unjustly. And Yes, this is one of the biggest reasons men disappear. The wife usually makes life so miserable for him, for whatever reason. I am sure their are women in that same situation. But it is more prevalent in men, and not because they don't love their children. Their are some I am sure that don't give a damn, but this man I have seen in tears, time and time again over not being able to spend time with his. I have seen him sneak to events and hide so that she didn't know he was there, just to watch whatever was going on with his children. They didn't even know he was there. So this is the only post I will respond to here after regarding irrelevant issues. I know that their are many different and worthy scenario's going on in the world. I am just dealing with this one.
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Gecko
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 19801
Loc: Third rock from the sun
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Then you ask why so many men evade the court after a divorce and become what they call "Dead Beat Dads" or commit suicide just before, during or after a divorce!
---> That's a real nice sad story and all that, but do you honestly think that MEN are the ONLY victims?
---> And ANYONE who commits suicide over "family law" is not only an idiot, but a coward too!
-------------------- If you air your dirty linen in public, expect people to comment on the skid marks!
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Melody
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 10102
Loc: California
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Despite what appears to be something interesting, you tend to lose many readers due to the lack of structure and breaks in your writing. I'm just trying to help you get more exposure and interest in your situation.
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almostheaven
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
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No, this is NOT one of the biggest reasons men disappear. Most of the ones I know of took off BEFORE a divorce was even in the works...my ex, my friend's ex, my aunt's ex, etc. etc. You're ASSUMING that most men take off because of this. So...how many men do you know that have been thrown in jail for no reason? I'm assuming this is not a normal case??? Or do you run accross this daily? If not, then where are you getting this is the reason most disappear?
He isn't being held unjustly because she's a woman or because the system discriminates against him. But because she has a foot into the legal system he does not. Just as I mentioned the problem Chrystal Brames faced. Her husband had a foot into the legal system and she did not. Unless most women have ties in the legal system, they're not going to be able to do this to their exes, and therefore the "reason most men disappear" line doesn't hold true.
You can make it the only time you'll respond if you choose, but I call it stereotyping, then burrying your head in the sand claiming that's not what you're doing. I'll let others decide whether they think you were or not on their own. I've simply pointed out that it's what you're doing and shown where you're doing it. It's up to you to ignore it and do it more, or to not.
-------------------- Char Fox
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Debbie_L
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/06/05
Posts: 2031
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Melody's right. I gave up after a few sentences. That, and the fact that the writer seemed to have been on a tangent about all the so-called unjustices done to "men" and that's why all the men that are deadbeats are deadbeats. BS. I'm sure the actual case being referred to is an injustice, but I was too put off by the sweeping generalizations to read much further. I also find it hard to follow when nothing is broken into paragraphs, and it just goes on and on.
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all2u
newbie
Reged: 12/20/06
Posts: 28
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[quote]Melody's right. I gave up after a few sentences. That, and the fact that the writer seemed to have been on a tangent about all the so-called unjustices done to "men" and that's why all the men that are deadbeats are deadbeats. BS. I'm sure the actual case being referred to is an injustice, but I was too put off by the sweeping generalizations to read much further. I also find it hard to follow when nothing is broken into paragraphs, and it just goes on and on. [/quote]..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... I guess I am just ignorant here, I didn't come here to stereotype, debate women, argue over domestic violence, or critic anyone. I just wanted to bring an issue forward to the minds of the general population in hopes for some help, changes in laws in the south and so fourth. YES! This happens a lot in the south, especially Mississippi! Hate to say it, but a pretty, crying, woman appearing helpless and vulnerable still takes the cake in this part of the country. If you notice you don't have very many female posters from this area. The men in this area are very egotistical and look for opportunity to be the biggest bull in the pen. More than anywhere else in the country, here it is, who you are, what you have and how much of it you own! The relationships are all based on it, and controlled by it. They don't like or accept newcomers, UNLESS, you have more money than they do. I do see this a lot here, more often than not it is due to a relationship either impending, current or hoped for by one of the people very close to the issue. Not only in divorce cases, but in everything. Mississippi is a very friendly state on the surface, but the people here will look you in the eye smiling, while their stabbing you in the back. Who said sugar won't get you very far? That being said, I am not a writer, sorry if my lack of abilities puts some off. I guess I was hoping most would see the issue and not the technic. So I guess it is futal to continue. Thanks for the help from those who gave me some Good Advice and help concerning the real issue here.
Edited by all2u (12/21/06 08:16 AM)
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almostheaven
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
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You got help on the "real issue" even from those who told you you were stereotyping. But you block it out because you can't stand to hear anything negative with the positive. But I'll still give you another negative. Loose the ........... across the screen. You're scrolling the text so wide that not only does one have to scroll up and down to read, but also back and forth. You won't get many readers like that.
As for most seeing the issue and not the "technic"?...If you cloud the issue by throwing in stuff that is based on opinion, people are always going to have something to say about the opinion part. Sticking solely to "the issue" would keep that from happening. But only the originating poster can do that by starting out with just "the issue".
-------------------- Char Fox
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Melody
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 10102
Loc: California
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I have a widescreen monitor...and it STILL won't all fit!!!
To the poster....you don't have to be a "writer"...meaning a professional...to post here. Paragraph writing is taught in 4th and 5th grades, and expanded upon in 6th and 7th grades to multiple paragraph essays. All I'm asking for is some natural breaks in the text....someone ANY adult who completed high school should be qualified to do.
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all2u
newbie
Reged: 12/20/06
Posts: 28
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[quote]I have a widescreen monitor...and it STILL won't all fit!!!
To the poster....you don't have to be a "writer"...meaning a professional...to post here. Paragraph writing is taught in 4th and 5th grades, and expanded upon in 6th and 7th grades to multiple paragraph essays. All I'm asking for is some natural breaks in the text....someone ANY adult who completed high school should be qualified to do. [/quote]
[u]Geez,Now you are attacking my person, and my education![/u]
[color:red] [u]PLEASE limit your responses to the issue, If you can't help, post where you can![/u][/color] [b]Mississippi is still a FAULT State. Your ex can accuse you of anything and totally ruin your reputation and life. Once a Judge has ruled on a Temporary order, it remains weather you can meet the order guideline or not. If you not you will end up in jail, for an indefinite period of time, if that judge is not in your favor, blinded by favoritism, can't see the ex's manipulation of the system and facts, or just doesn't real care. [/b]
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all2u
newbie
Reged: 12/20/06
Posts: 28
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I AM NOT HERE TO DEBATE WITH YOU! JOIN A DEBATING FORUM. I Guess I am just an uneducated idiot for being new and not knowing how to work the options on this site yet! Thanks, for the help!
If there is someone out there whom is willing to help me learn how to do this, PLEASE! PLEASE! Help, so these women will go find someone else to debate with.
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