DedicatedDad
veteran

Reged: 09/05/04
Posts: 1318
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Selling the house? You are spending all your time on how to continue to get a free ride. You were even willing to give away custody as you thought he would have to pick all of the expense of it...when you found out you would have to pay, your tune changed....as in it's not about the children to you but MONEY.
Lady, you need to get a job.
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Renny
addict

Reged: 09/24/11
Posts: 479
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Gr8, I think shanti was merely trying to work out something for the kids and herself -- some deal ht would allow her to keep her inheritance while not rocking the boat for the kids and father. Anyway, there seems to be an understanding now that any deal would involve selling the house.
A word about the cursed yacht. Every time this thread pops up i see limony and a yacht. This case is bout survival. And Anything under 100 feet these days is a boat. It's a stupid boat and it costs a fortune to maintain that the husband doesn't have. He should be making around half a million a year to have a boat. Instead he's trying to take money out of the house to pay for the boat.
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Shanti
newbie
Reged: 10/29/11
Posts: 36
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I guess I will stop writing on this thread. My reason for not wanting to sell the house is being ridiculous misunderstood. This house has no mortgage so it wouldn't be difficult to stay here and wait until the economy gets better to sell it. My stbx never saw a house with no mortgage in his life (his 82 years old father still has one). So he is dying to put his hands on the proceeds of the house. I know he has the right to do as he pleases but I have kids that depend on us. The custody issue was so misunderstood too...there was nothing malicious on my part...all I was trying to do was to find a way that he wouldn't be so desperately for money, I thought by not having to pay cs he wouldn't feel such an urgency to sell the house...it has nothing to do with me finding out that I would have to pay cs to him...omg...so off the mark DedicatedDad. I have no trust on my stbx's ability to handle money. A man who buys a boat when he has children to raise is not to be trusted. As a matter of fact if we didn't lose our house like happened to so many people lately is because of me paying off the mortgage with my inheritance. Because once he started making 45k it would have been extremely hard for him to keep up with mortgage payments. He is luck that I was unselfish enough to invest my inheritance in the house freeing ourselves from mortgage. It is just natural now that I want my money back otherwise all I did was to able him to purchase a " boy's toy" .
Btw when he bought the boat his family, his friends and I were shocked. Everybody thought it was the most childish thing to do. Of course I now have to fight not to be part of this boat loan that I never agreed to in the first place. I will definitely get an attorney to speak for me because I can't risk the judge misunderstanding my intentions like happened here. I got a lot of great ideas here and I thank you all, even the ones who called me gold digger and bxxx e.t.c because it made me realize how I need a legal representation.
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30369
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The problem is that you want you MONEY back, AND you want the HOUSE that the money paid for, free and clear.
And you can drop the LIES about "Oh, I just wanted to SAVE him some child suport payments..." BULLSH!T~
-------------------- Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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elliesmom
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 11/07/05
Posts: 8835
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Ok, now you paid off the mortgage with your inheritance?
Unfortunately, I think that will basically comingle the asset and he is going to get half of the house.
Which will cause me to alter my original suggestion. He has no reason to accept such an offer.
I am not sure what the deal is with his dad having a mortgage. My own grandfather ALWAYS had one. Its tax deductible and just about any other type of financing is not. Any boat, car, etc. that he bought was always done by mortgaging the house. Lower interest rate too.
I don't see any way to avoid selling the house. You can't get a mortgage to buy him out with zero income and on his income with all that debt - I would bet he cannot qualify either.
His income is rather low that even though I suspect a 20 yr marriage would garner spousal support - it won't be a high figure. Especially if you plan to have him pay CS. That will come out first.
-------------------- Forgiveness is...letting go of the hope that the past can be changed.
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DedicatedDad
veteran

Reged: 09/05/04
Posts: 1318
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Gasp....she will have to get a JOB!!!!
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javajunkiee
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 3158
Loc: SC
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"It is just natural now that I want my money back otherwise all I did was to able him to purchase a " boy's toy" ."
Natural, maybe, naive, probably. What you want and what you could get aren't necessarily the same thing, so be prepared, and learn one valuable lesson for the future:
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-------------------- Marriage doesn't come with a money-back guarantee.
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Debi
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 7139
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She gave us the name of his boat and where it's docked and in which city. You could probably figure out a way to get a hold of him just on that.
-------------------- When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.
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Avaya
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 02/09/06
Posts: 9823
Loc: Arkansas
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[quote]Because once he started making 45k ...I want my money back otherwise all I did was to able him to purchase a " boy's toy" .[/quote]
Lets back up a little bit. How did someone with a 45k salary convince a bank to loan him half a million dollars to buy a yacht? Did he use the house as collateral? He HAD to have collateral OR his income isn't 45k (which is what I've been saying all along - just because that's what he 'brings home' that doesn't make it his salary - all of the bills the company pays on his behalf should be considered salary to him).
-------------------- Eternity is too long to be wrong.
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