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mandagayle
newbie


Reged: 07/31/07
Posts: 28
i really really need help with this!!!!!
      #269569 - 07/31/07 01:52 PM

my husband had several affairs so i left him. he moved in with his pregnant g/f so i filed adultry on him. we tried to work out a divorce several times but can't. after some time i moved in with someone so i don't think the adultry thing will work, so how do i get rid of him?? he won't agree, and now i don't think i have grounds

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Melody
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 10102
Loc: California
Does your state require grounds? [Re: mandagayle]
      #269666 - 07/31/07 03:06 PM

Can't you just file a 'no fault' or 'irreconcilable differences' divorce?

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mandagayle
newbie


Reged: 07/31/07
Posts: 28
Re: Does your state require grounds? [Re: Melody]
      #269670 - 07/31/07 03:09 PM

it has no fault (mississippi) but he won't agree to anything unless i ask for nothing. none of our propery, value of 3 vehicles, no medical bill reimbursement, no medical insurance for our 2 kids, no back child support. basically i can have the kids and thats it.

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matart1
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 09/01/05
Posts: 2798
Re: Does your state require grounds? [Re: mandagayle]
      #269729 - 07/31/07 03:48 PM

so what if he does not want the divorce - you were probably doing good with your divorce until you moved you and the kids in with another man before you cleaned up what was going on with your marriage - kind of a poor choice in many ways but to each their own....

regardless, it takes 2 to marry and 1 to divorce.

file whatever way you have an option to use now and take your chances in court.

each of you are responsible for the choices you have made.

therefore there will be a division of assets and debt.

a smart move on your behalf is not to rely on another person to provide medical insurance, both of you should provide if you are interested in the children's health.

if you already have a court order for child support then he will have arrears building for nonpayment - if you have no court order there is no back child support.

it would be highly recommended that you seek a lawyer and get your marriage worked out before moving into another relationship and compounding things into a bigger mess...

--------------------
Life is a long lesson in humility.


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Melody
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Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 10102
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Then it's no problem [Re: mandagayle]
      #269778 - 07/31/07 05:23 PM

Just file a regular no fault divorce...no grounds needed...and if he doesn't want to agree to anything, then it will go to the judge and the judge will rule on any issues that are in dispute (property, support, etc)

He doesn't have to agree to anything, he can insist on having things his way only...but that won't stop the divorce...OR mean that he will get his way.


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mandagayle
newbie


Reged: 07/31/07
Posts: 28
Re: Then it's no problem [Re: Melody]
      #269791 - 07/31/07 05:56 PM

he filed on 1) adultry 2) cruel and inhumane treatment and 3) irr. differences. think that'll cover it?

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mandagayle
newbie


Reged: 07/31/07
Posts: 28
Re: Then it's no problem [Re: mandagayle]
      #269792 - 07/31/07 05:56 PM

i mean we filed not he.

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Melody
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Reged: 06/02/04
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Well, [Re: mandagayle]
      #269874 - 07/31/07 07:55 PM

the adultery is out because you BOTH committed it. What I don't understand is why you are bothering to file grounds? If you are in a no-fault state, then you just file and you get it...no need to PROVE anything, which is what "fault" or grounds would mean.

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Goodmom
Pooh-Bah
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Reged: 06/17/07
Posts: 2085
Re: Well, [Re: Melody]
      #269897 - 07/31/07 08:15 PM

Quote:

the adultery is out because you BOTH committed it. What I don't understand is why you are bothering to file grounds? If you are in a no-fault state, then you just file and you get it...no need to PROVE anything, which is what "fault" or grounds would mean.




That may not be true. It's not like she walked out like he did for another person.

She is better off discussing the issue with an attorney in her area who would be able to definitively answer her question.


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Melody
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Reged: 06/02/04
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Good call [Re: Goodmom]
      #269952 - 07/31/07 09:00 PM

isn't that what everyone here should do? DUH!

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almostheaven
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Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
Re: Well, [Re: Melody]
      #269992 - 07/31/07 10:06 PM

I'm not sure fault is still out. I mean, there is STILL fault, just that the court may now consider them both to be at fault. However, they also may NOT consider her at fault since this occured well after the filing and living separate, and after he had already moved on with someone else. Yet, if she's in a no fault state, fault doesn't even have any bearing anyway.

--------------------
Char Fox


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jhan6120
journeyman


Reged: 01/31/07
Posts: 60
Re: Good call [Re: Melody]
      #271753 - 08/06/07 09:00 AM

Yeah yeah, your husband says this, your husband says that. Bottom line is he has absolutely no idea what a judge will say. He's just talking crap. Go ahead and file.

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Drew
old hand
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Reged: 07/30/07
Posts: 1017
Loc: somewhere more familiar
Re: i really really need help with this!!!!! [Re: mandagayle]
      #271907 - 08/06/07 03:07 PM

My x started a relationship all but immediately after she filed (almost 2 years ago) they were spending the night with each other etc. I met someone (14 months after) and we see each other regularly but no overnite or any pda especially around our children. She has 2 I have 3. In court my x denied any relations (I had video from my PD) and brought my "friend" to our final at my attorney's request.
The x tried to alledge all sorts of impropriety on my part and denied her own and ended up looking like a fool.

Honesty is the ONLY policy in the court room.

If you can prove with documentation that he had these affairs while you were still "together" and that your new relationship started well after the event (filing/seperation) then I would hope/think the judge would consider this. Our judge did.

Speak openly and honestly to your atty. about this.

--------------------
"living, learning, from my creator. you gave me life now show me how to live" c. cornell


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