Nicole
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 01/25/05
Posts: 1762
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Paperwork came through yesterday and as of today he can get skids. He took off half of today and the next two days to drive there and pick them up and then they have court on Friday. He has tried contacting BM since yesterday afternoon but she has refused to talk to him and she has refused to answer her phone so he can talk to skids. Right now he is driving not knowing if he will actually see skids.
For everyone that wanted to know and questioned it so much: neither the state we live or the state BM lives in is opening a case/investigation regarding what happened. Both states also stated that no household would be said to have failed to protect even if BM never gets SS counseling.
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annieo
veteran
Reged: 07/07/10
Posts: 1410
Loc: Pacific Northwest
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"For everyone that wanted to know and questioned it so much: neither the state we live or the state BM lives in is opening a case/investigation regarding what happened. Both states also stated that no household would be said to have failed to protect even if BM never gets SS counseling."
So if siblings abuse one another is is aok with the state - good to know the state thinks it is alright for ince$t to take place in family homes and that nothing take place to help either child.
Not trying to be rude I am just not believing that no one involved in state/social services cares about not only the victim but also the perpetrator....wow.just.wow.
ETA: I hope you and the bd do something to help both children - please be responsible and get them both some help.
Edited by annieo (06/27/12 09:10 PM)
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english7
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/27/09
Posts: 3001
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Or it was determined that no sexual abuse occurred.
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M5M5
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/29/05
Posts: 11722
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Annieo...she still has not said publicly what exactly took place. Maybe not much happened before it was discovered? Praying that is the case...and that both parties keep pursuing therapy for the kids.
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Nicole
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 01/25/05
Posts: 1762
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Exactly M5M5, I have never said publically on this board what happened and I won't. I have already stated before that we have a counselor set up for SS down here, which we have had to cancel two appointments. But they said as soon as we actually get them that they would try to get him in ASAP but they wouldn't set up another appointment until we actually get them. To this date, BM has still not informed DH if she has set up a counselor in her town and he has asked, she just never answers him.
Two hours before DH got to BM's town she texted him back. She said before she would bring the skids to him she wanted to talk to her lawyer and the GAL. Which would be totally understandable if she hadn't known a day and a half that DH was able to get the kids. She had time to call on Tuesday and yesterday. When DH told her that she knows she talked to them already because she has known about it, she changed the reason for him not getting to pick them up to the skids wanting to talk to the GAL first. Which DH has an appointment with the GAL today so if skids do want to talk to him they can.
DH texted me this morning and said she is suppose to be on her way now with the kids which I don't know what happened from last night to this morning but he is so excited he gets to see them. His sister is moving across country this week with her two kids which they are the same age as skids, so as soon as he gets them they are planning to meet up so the kids can spend some time together before he has his appointments.
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annieo
veteran
Reged: 07/07/10
Posts: 1410
Loc: Pacific Northwest
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If nothing actually happened and there were "thoughts" of doing something then counseling would be in order. The jist of the posts didn't seem as though nothing happened?
M5M5 - I hope your correct as that would be the best case scenario.
SRS was saying that she thought nothing really happened and she was called out for it - her approach wasn't exactly kind but the point of her posts was that nothing really happened and from what is posted from Nicole now seems to verify that line of thinking.
I wouldn't post what exactly happened on a public board just as Nicole said she won't and it does appear as though someone is going to help the children in some regard and that is (imo) the correct avenue to take.
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Cassie23
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/07/05
Posts: 14714
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Who said anything about incest? We don't know exactly what occurred but Inappropriate touching could cause reason for serious concern but not enough for the state to launch an investigation.
The parents are seeking help from professionals and relaying that information to BM. No one can force BM to take the avenues most would see as safeguarding all children and the household as a whole. Although it seems like with the courts involvement maybe something more can be done. Prayers for both families...
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annieo
veteran
Reged: 07/07/10
Posts: 1410
Loc: Pacific Northwest
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In@est can be as simple as pushing a sister in the breast area - I know of one individual that this happened to and he has to register for a year as a s ex offender. The 12 year old shoved his sister (14) down by grabbing her breast area and taking her to the ground - they were fighting and the state pressed the charges as in@est where imo the charge should have been assault. Anything between siblings is referred to as in@est whether penetration occurs or not - touching is called in@est.
We don't know exactly what happened in Nicoles home and it appears as though they (sm and bd) are taking the correct course of action.
I personally think the bm in this picture is trying to keep the children away from their father for whatever reason and this issue would certainly help her cause but the main goal here is to protect/help both children regardless of what did or didn't transpire.
I wish them all luck and hope the boys get to stay in their fathers life as much as possible because it is always best for the children to have both parents whenever possible.
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Reilly
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/05/05
Posts: 3374
Loc: right here ----->
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No...we don't know what occurred...but Nicole's first post indicated "sibling sexual abuse"....I think, without further clarification, that most assumed it was more than touching...
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Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?~Marilyn Monroe
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SweetLight
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 01/07/10
Posts: 2003
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Who said anything about incest?”
----->Nicole. What is all this about then Cassie? The BM in this situation seems to be doing the right thing, without the recommended threats of contacting CPS over her head. Which Nicole may have taken by now. VERY ironic advice given considering what I got here.
Some intentional direction is needed big time. The focus should be the victim and for some reason, it doesn’t seem to be. JMHO.
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