Karen1
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 1794
Loc: Ohio
|
|
Settlement hearing went wel today. We actually signed papers per all agreements. Just in a memorandum to the court, draft form so my attorney warned could change, stbx could change his mind again. SO am trying not to be to excited. . She will get it all in legalese for us both to sign, then will go forth as an uncontested divorce, hearing scheduled for latter July.. So the real celebration will be then. YAHOO!!!!!
I feel it is a good settlement. I gave on what I feel are minor issues and not worth going to divorce trial over and feel the rest is fair. Very importantly, my attorney agrees in that it is a good settlement of assets. Not sure stbx feels that way as he felt some marital assets would not be shared such as pension . Guess he understands what the law is now.
I did not shed one tear, even though some of those old "trigger" songs came on the radio on the way home. The ones I used to cry listening to, finally had to start turning radio off when they came on. Today I sang along, although I did my usual and changed some of the words to fit the situtation.
Plus, last night I tackled a repair that had been hanging over my head and was really unsure how to do, just could not figure out. I replaced a toilet seat and lid. Only instructions were a drawing on the box, I hate those, I prefer written instructions. Was not hard to do once you figure it out so for anyone who has done so it probably seems like, what was the problem?. I knew I was missing something when I would try to take it off and although loose it was still attached and discovered there are big plastic washer / nut type things underneath the toilet that are involved. Trivial thing, but was a big plus for me when I completed it.
As always, the support, encourage and advice I find here is indeed priceless!!
Karen
--------------------
"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened".
|
Lyn
journeyman
Reged: 06/04/05
Posts: 95
Loc: NJ
|
|
So happy for you, Karen...sounds like the best has come of a bad situation! Congrats on toilet the seat replacement...have cursed over more than a few through the years; a chore I had to tackle, or go nuts waiting for it to be done, even when X was around. Lyn
|
mlh53
member
Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 110
|
|
Hi Karen,
Glad to know the hearing went well and without incident. I'll be sure to keep my fingers crossed for the next one and hope it'll go as smoothly :).
Melanie
P.S. Congrats btw on fixing the toilet seat. Way to go :).
|
Karen1
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 1794
Loc: Ohio
|
|
Thanks Melanie... didn't want to post too many of the details here until it is a done deal. He may read the posts here and would figure out for sure it was me and decide to not sign the final paperwork just to be more of a jerk. WIll share some of that after it is over. I am relieved now for a lot of reasons, the event for my future d i l with stbx and OW there went well and I know I Ok with him not a part of life, the person he is now. We did have a lot of good years and I miss that, but that has been gone for a long time. I now know emotionally I am doing OK, more than OK actually. That is a real plus, and the fact that this is almost over and I can move from this house to another and have more time for fun stuff for me, no legal crap, no sorting through 30 plus years of accumulation, getting a house ready to sell etc... I am so ready to move on with life without all of that stuff. Not sure I will ever give up coming here though. I was so raw emotionally when I found this site and many people have helped me so much, I don't want to lose touch, and I want to be one of those folks who can help and encourage other newbies.
Thanks also re toilet seat. It really had be baffled and I knew it was something I should be able to handle as I have done repairs that involved a lot more, used power tools etc. So it felt good to finally figure it out.
Karen
--------------------
"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened".
|
lucky44
journeyman
Reged: 06/16/05
Posts: 60
|
|
Hey, Lucky with the Cruiser, thinking of you and pulling for you. Reminds me of that Helen Ready song, Long Hard Climb. It's been a long time coming and you sure have come a LONG way. Great to hear it's in the final ending. You'll have to do a new signature line since you'll be out of legal limbo. How about, "What hits the fan is not equally distributed." Hugs!
|
NancyD
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 2105
Loc: New York
|
|
Glad to hear things are going smoothly. The best kind of deal is where both parties come away feeling like winners; the worst is when they both feel like losers. And the average one is that you feel like you got what really mattered to you but had to give up on some less important things.
I know seeing the progress people make is very therapeutic for me, even at this stage (we all sound like cheerleaders, "It will get better"). Yes stick around, and as the unfortunate newbies find this place, you'll realize even more how much progress you've made.
|
Karen1
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 1794
Loc: Ohio
|
|
Thanks Lucky... I am so looking forward to a new signature line... your idea is a good one. I want to get past all big decisions, including where to live, buy a small house, just be settled so I can have all of it off my mind so constantly... just want to resume life with nothing divorce related except for emotions (and that is going to be a while) and nothing moving related. Getting closer!
I know I thus far feel like I came a way a winner, especially when I compare it to the dissolution papers he handed me, all ready for my signature (not) the day he left. Since I conceded on a few things, ( really just possession wise) hopefully he does too. I don't really care how he feels, he wanted total freedom and freedom does have a cost.
--------------------
"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened".
|
Karen1
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 1794
Loc: Ohio
|
|
Thanks Lyn. It is getting closer. Glad to hear the wedding went so swell, will e mail later this evening. That toilet seat had me baffled and I can do repairs, or at least have helped enough to know something about a lot of things. It should have dawned on me that with a bolt / screw involved there was probably a washer / nut involved when it did not pull right out.
Karen
--------------------
"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened".
|
Karen1
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 1794
Loc: Ohio
|
|
Guess I would fall in the average range, although the things I gave up on were either decided that way prior by the magistrate (life insurance to cover my share of his pension, ended up not necessary cause once the QDRO is done my share is held in an account for me and is vested, protected, I can even appoint a beneficiary in the event I woud die before he retires and start to get my share of his pension. And a couple of posessions I decided I did not want. SO maybe I lean more toward the winner stage, although is not a done deal yet so I try not to be too excited.
I agree on seeing progress is therapeutic, and I realize already how far I have come since I found this site. If I can help anyone else that will be great.
Karen
--------------------
"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened".
|
Previous
Index
Next
Threaded
Edit
Reply
Quote
