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SCImike
newbie


Reged: 09/28/06
Posts: 37
the judge gave me full custody of my son!
      #171633 - 11/27/06 12:20 PM

Guys,
The judge gave the full custody of my son to me! I am so happy about this.
My ex wife moved out on 1/5/2006 and soon after moved in with a guy. I filed for divorce later in Jan. 06 and she responded in Feb. 06. We could not get agreement on child custody because she wanted me to have 100% physical custody but she did not want to pay any child support. I have agreed and still not get any financial support from her but refused to sign a form to avoid my right to request any child support in the future. She did not visit our son from Jan. to May 06 and started visited him once a week from 8:00am to 4:00pm. By the way, my son now is 2 Ĺ years old.
Anyway, before she moved out, she many times threatened me to burn down my house and also my parentsí, she would rather kill me etc. After she moved out, she keeps making those threats when I brought up the issue of child custody and so. I did not treat those threats seriously until I talked to someone. I filed for a restraining order base on the threats she made in September, 2006 and in the same month, she had a motion of bifurcation to end status of the marriage only, so the marriage ended in Oct. 06.
My restraining order was given for 30 days and a hearing day was set. I asked the court provided county shrift department to serve the hearing paper to my ex and she did not show up during the first hearing due to thrift dept. could not locate her. The hearing was postponed for 30 days. I had one of my friend handed over the hearing notice in a large yellow envelope at a public parking lot in front of a local supper market when she brought back our son on the day she visited him.
She did not show up on the 2nd hearing date again and the judge issued 5 years of the restraining order and full custody. The judge even gave me the right to tape her threats without her notice including phone conversation. The judge told me that I should also request for child support and court provided me the county CSE information. I have no plan to go after her for some money because I donít think anyone should be forced to raise their kids. I enjoy raising my son and I now have the ability to do so, therefore I chose not to contact the CSE. I donít know why she did not show up; I think she did not even bother to look at the envelope that my friend handed over. Well, I think that is not my problem. I am happy now. I still let her to visit our son on the day she picks. She normally sees him once a week for few hours. She still sometime calling me names and so, I just mostly ignore her. I wish her new guy will do better with her.
My son and I just had a wonderful thanksgiving weekend. We had thanksgiving fest at my one of my relativeís house with 30+ people. My son played with many kids there and he even laughed in the dream at that night. I took him for a pony ride and train ride on the day after the thanksgiving. Sure we went to church on Sunday too. I really thankful for the god gave me a prefect son.
I wish all you guys had a wonderful time too.


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Runswithscissors
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 05/29/04
Posts: 13394
Re: the judge gave me full custody of my son! [Re: SCImike]
      #171861 - 11/27/06 09:05 PM

Glad to hear it!!
While I am sadden for your children, it apparantly is in the best interest. It's hard to give high-fives when it utimately effects the children. In a perfect world, they should have a mother/father that both get to see them equally..... but if the other parent isn't committed, they are lucky to have you pick up the pieces!


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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 31190
You know I support... [Re: Runswithscissors]
      #171916 - 11/28/06 04:51 AM

...50/50, but I support a REBUTTABLE presumption. This woman has made it clear she doesn't WANT custody.

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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Runswithscissors
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Reged: 05/29/04
Posts: 13394
Re: You know I support... [Re: gr8Dad]
      #171970 - 11/28/06 08:39 AM

I don't disagree and I thought in my post that I said that....it's still hard to high five...the kids loose period..... due to bad choices made by mom.

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SCImike
newbie


Reged: 09/28/06
Posts: 37
Re: You know I support... [Re: Runswithscissors]
      #172063 - 11/28/06 12:58 PM

I want to make two things clear here:
(1) I have never refused any CS from my ex but she has never offered any. Not only this, she stated many times that she is not willing to pay for the CS. Since there is no court order for CS and also I have never in writing to request any CS, I can not say she refused to pay either. I remember someone wrote on this board: ďA parent can be ordered to pay support, but whether or not he/she is willing to pay is a different matter all together. The difference is: one is a parent who cares for the welfare of children and one does not care.Ē
(2) I am not rich. I am an average engineer who has a job. I have no problem to buy food any other supplies for my son and myself. However, he is almost 3 yrs old and it is the time for him to start school. I called few pre schools in my area which some friends recommended. They are not cheap. They all charge similar about $1200 more or less a month if my son goes there full time (5 days and 7 hours/day). Since the school charging so high, I decided to sell my house and move into an apartment. I can not afford a house payment and the tuition at the same time. I figured that I can buy a house any time but my son can only go to school once and the time is now! The 4 bed room house is a bit too big for us anyway.


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PAFamilyLawNet
member


Reged: 10/09/06
Posts: 128
Loc: PA
Re: You know I support... [Re: SCImike]
      #172084 - 11/28/06 03:17 PM

congratulations SCIMike, sounds like you did the best thing for your child.

--------------------
All Things Pennsylvania Family Law


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Runswithscissors
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 05/29/04
Posts: 13394
Re: You know I support... [Re: SCImike]
      #172174 - 11/28/06 07:25 PM

???

Maybe you don't understand.... I AM HAPPY you won custody of your children... HOWEVER I am SAD for your child. The other parent is a dead-beat..... and as I've said CLEARLY you are the best parent.....

In regards to the CS....what do you want? A brownie?
MY EX has custody.... the child lives with ME and I don't take CS...... and I paid over 1K a month for ONE child for over 8 years...... what does any of that have to do with the fact that your child loses out due to a dead beat parent?


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