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meandmygirl12
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Reged: 03/05/07
Posts: 8
I don't want him around anymore
      #206300 - 03/05/07 12:37 PM

Hi everyone, my friend told me about this site. I got divorced last September from a man I just couldn't get along with, not to mention he cheated twice. We have a 12 year old girl. I met a man in December and we have decided to get married this month. I know it's a short time, but we got to know each other very quickly, plus a friend of mine knew him before. My daughter and this man get along alright, and he's really good to her.

The problem is, I think we would all be better off if her dad didn't come around anymore. I think it is too confusing for my daughter to have 2 dads. He's not a great dad and that's the main reason I don't want him around her. He won't ever let her go out with her friends the weekends he has her. I mean she's 12 years old, she's got a life. And he keeps bringing her down about her grades. She tries really hard and has only once gotten a D on a test. But whenever she makes below a B, he tells her how lazy she's being and that she needs to do better. It really hurts her. He's pretty much called her stupid before and that really hurts her self-image.

So my question is, what is involved in trying to get sole custody with no visitation? Is it possible? And would her dad have to agree to let my fiance' adopt her someday or could a court decide that? Thank you for any suggestions.


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Gecko
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WTF?!? [Re: meandmygirl12]
      #206304 - 03/05/07 12:42 PM

TROLL!

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Avaya
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Re: I don't want him around anymore [Re: meandmygirl12]
      #206306 - 03/05/07 12:44 PM

Girl, please don't even go there. Your daughter Needs her father - HER father, not some guy you marry after 3 months. She's 12 and 'she has a life' which includes needing to go out with friends more than twice a month? 12 year olds DON'T NEED a life, IMO. Not one like that. This is the man YOU picked to father your child so if he's lacking, too bad, he's still her father. You will NOT be doing her any favors by 1) marrying this new guy, nor 2) by trying to cut her daddy out of her life.

If you think a 12 year old girl will be confused by having two daddys (which is absurd because you can marry 10 times and she will STILL only have ONE daddy), then maybe you should give him custody so that she can concentrate on the real daddy.

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Eternity is too long to be wrong.


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katiefedup
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Re: I don't want him around anymore [Re: meandmygirl12]
      #206309 - 03/05/07 12:49 PM

idiot

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meandmygirl12
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Reged: 03/05/07
Posts: 8
Re: I don't want him around anymore [Re: Avaya]
      #206312 - 03/05/07 12:50 PM

I understand where you're coming from, thank you for the advice. I just feel like her new step dad will be a better father to her. I want what's best for her and I would never hurt her. I have considered giving her father custody but I would miss her so bad and I really don't think he would be good for her. What do you think I should do? Should I give him a sort of "trial period" custody thing and see how it goes? It could be best I guess.

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meandmygirl12
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Reged: 03/05/07
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Re: I don't want him around anymore [Re: katiefedup]
      #206313 - 03/05/07 12:51 PM

There is no need to call me names. I came here for advice I get called names. Thanks.

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katiefedup
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Re: I don't want him around anymore [Re: meandmygirl12]
      #206314 - 03/05/07 12:56 PM

dad are not like shoes where if you find a better fit..out with the old and in with the new. By the way dear, she doesn't have a new dad! Grow up

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meandmygirl12
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Re: I don't want him around anymore [Re: katiefedup]
      #206315 - 03/05/07 12:58 PM

Where did I say she had a new dad?

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katiefedup
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Re: I don't want him around anymore [Re: meandmygirl12]
      #206316 - 03/05/07 12:58 PM

First you want for your boyfriend to adopt her NOW you want the birth father to have a trial period at custody. Is it a school holiday, or are you just home sick today?

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katiefedup
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Re: I don't want him around anymore [Re: meandmygirl12]
      #206317 - 03/05/07 12:59 PM

just feel like her new step dad will be a better father to her

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