breadwinner
recently joined
Reged: 05/15/07
Posts: 2
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Help . . . I have been the only one working for the majority of our marriage. He has been out on disability (altho he could work) and assisted in raising our young child. He said he would get a job and move out, but then got "advise" to not get a job and stay put. I feel like am going to get sc--wed and have to pay him alimony. We have been together 9 years and married 8. What can I do? This is a case of role reversal. I want joint custody and feel we should both support our child. I don't think either of us should pay the other any money at all.
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almostheaven
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
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Considering the marriage is under 10 years and he's on disability (so I'm assuming paid disability), unless you are a pretty high income earner, its unlikely he'd get alimony. But if he did, it would be for a short period. Alimony is generally to balance out a large income discrepancy for long-term marriages (10+ years), and generally only temporarily to allow the other individual to seek better employment. You may want to seek your own advice from an attorney and be proactive instead of reactive and waiting for him to make the moves.
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Char Fox
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Maury
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 8146
Loc: This Asylum --->
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The law differs from state to state. However, I can state that in some states, like Minnesota, you could, indeed, be facing long term or permanent maintenance even on a short term marriage if the other party is unable to work based on a disabililty and you make a decent wage. As a result, I would be cautious about relying on any assertion that spousal maintenance is unlikely unless or until all of the faacts and circumstances of the case have been analyzed.
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almostheaven
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
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Ummm, that's what I said Maury. That it's "unlikely", not impossible, and unless she's a pretty high ("decent") income earner.
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Char Fox
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Maury
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 8146
Loc: This Asylum --->
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Just being clear. No offense intended.
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breadwinner
recently joined
Reged: 05/15/07
Posts: 2
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he gets social security disability and is considered perm disabled. Of course he took himself off the meds a couple of months ago, stopped seeing a dr., has been working out and doing karate two nights a week with a severe pain disease that is suppossed to leave him with limited mobility. I earn less than $100K. What do you think now?
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Maury
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 8146
Loc: This Asylum --->
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I think it is likely to be long term spousal support if you earn near $100,000 and he is recognized as disabled.
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almostheaven
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
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$100K is a lot and he's not going to get anywhere near that on disability. So you COULD be looking at alimony. But without knowing the state, no one can say. Even then, its often left up to the judges.
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Char Fox
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yregna
veteran
Reged: 07/25/06
Posts: 1265
Loc: Oregon
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I do not believe what I'm seeing here...Finally a man being the smart one via divorce law.
Stay put buddy, you'll be getting checks for life, Ha
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"Anything free is worth what you pay for it..."
"Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get"
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almostheaven
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
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SS is HARD to come by. They require at least 3 doctors to diagnose a disability severe enough to qualify. So he's unlikely to be faking it or truly able to hold down a full-time job.
My dad was disabled most of my life. There were times he could sit down at the flea market and I thought if he can do that, he can work. But he couldn't honestly. He couldn't [censored] it at a job with stress that would leave him a nervous wreck, and he couldn't walk for long periods of time anyway, so it would have to be a sit down job with no deadlines or people...and I just don't know of any positions like that or we'd all be applying. We may think the individual can work, but if he gets SS, its unlikely he'd be an effective worker.
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Char Fox
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