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yregna
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Reged: 07/25/06
Posts: 1265
Loc: Oregon
Re: Scared to death [Re: jaiye]
      #255228 - 06/28/07 01:42 PM

Quote " live with the known rather than to take a chance on the unknown..."

Translation: Live with the known $$ coming into the household, rather than get out and earn my own living...

There may have been a time when women were honest about their desire for money, but no one has see it....

--------------------
"Anything free is worth what you pay for it..."
"Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get"


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Annie7676
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Reged: 06/05/05
Posts: 863
Loc: NY
Re: Scared to death [Re: yregna]
      #255237 - 06/28/07 02:01 PM

obviously you must have gotten burned by your woman...but not all woman need a man to support them...some of us do go to college or learn a skill with out college so we can pay our own way and not let a man control us financially or in any other matter.....wonder what happened to you....

if you view all women like that then you will forever be losing out on life...


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yregna
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Reged: 07/25/06
Posts: 1265
Loc: Oregon
Re: Scared to death [Re: Annie7676]
      #256850 - 07/02/07 02:15 PM

Not all, but a huge majority. HUGE !!

Friggen' needle in a haystack to find a good looking one who doesn't want money. Sorry the truth hurts...

--------------------
"Anything free is worth what you pay for it..."
"Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get"


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Annie7676
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Reged: 06/05/05
Posts: 863
Loc: NY
Re: Scared to death [Re: yregna]
      #256977 - 07/02/07 06:15 PM

Doesn't hurt me in the least, maybe its your attitude that makes a good looking women who does not need you to support her that makes it so hard for you....attitude is everything...your bitterness may seep through we can only hide our dark side for so long and then it creeps out, kind of like pandora's box...maybe you keep trying to attract the same type...who knows but in the end...unless you figure it out it will only end up hurting you

interesting that you only view women as wanting a meal ticket...there are plenty of women out there that make more than enough to never ever have to rely on a man financially and for those of us that have that...its great...


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Dixie
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Reged: 07/26/07
Posts: 1
Loc: WashDC suburbs
Re: Scared to death [Re: jaiye]
      #267487 - 07/26/07 09:43 PM

Wow, I was also married for 30 years, right out of high school. While we did have some good years, he had anger issues and was very controling in nature. (for example, made my our son, 16 at the time, carry a concealed gun in the car. Me, too, but at least I was able to go get a carry and conceal permit to protect myself). I knew for about 5 years and buried my head....and did not deal with it. I could have very easily gone the way of the bottle.

No, what brought the end of my fear of change was his anger and impatience pushing me one time too hard. See, I suddenly found myself very depressed and was seeking help from a doctor, who was ordering tests and sending me to specialists. When you are severely depressed, you can't do anything. Well, someone's meals were not getting cooked, groceries not being bought (even tho we had tons of food for the disaster that never came) and I was told to snap out of it. I went out of town one weekend to get away (God, I hated weekends at home) and came back to being locked out of the bedroom. Three days later, it the lack of feeling safe in my own home drove me out. I left my 13 year old soon, barely able to care for myself. I was homeless and sick.

Turns out not long after, I was told I had cancer of the thyroid. Funny, how some change their tunes when they show their ass. I did not return and refused all counseling. He not only was out of control with his anger, he had turned mean and vindictive. He vowed to destroy me, to my face and to my children's face. I consider him evil, pure evil.

Fast forward, he denies my youngest son's presence at the hospital for my surgery. ("I will bring him after"). My son was sent to school, not knowing how his mother was doing in surgery. The doctors were preparing me for radiation, so I did not aggressively fight for custody of my youngest. My oldest was emancipated and not part of any custody hearing.

Finding out that my thyroid was not cancerous was one of the most bitter sweet experiences of my life. I was cancer free, but did not have my son because of an opinion (cells consistent w/ Hurthle Cell.....).

In this past year, I have grown more than I have in the past 10 years. And while I would never tell anyone how to live their lives, I will only say I learned fear of the unknown is what drives our decisions.

In the past year, there is not one day I did not feel fear, but it's fear I can live with. I still have much to be gratful for......including my share of the marital property, lol. Seriously, I have learned what is important.

So, when I hear someone express fear, it's easy for many of us to understand. I had greater fear for what I would become if I stayed than my fear of being on my own.

Dixie

(sorry, didn't mean to unload with the first post, but it seemed way too coy to say "someday I will share my story." It's history, and I have not looked back once)

--------------------
It is better to be hated for something you are, than loved for something you are not.


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Sherron
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Reged: 11/25/06
Posts: 20519
Re: Scared to death [Re: Dixie]
      #268709 - 07/29/07 07:41 PM

"Friggen' needle in a haystack to find a good looking one who doesn't want money. Sorry the truth hurts... "

Well, maybe you need to find an average looking one then? I know I am going to sound stereotypical here, but a lot of woman who get by on their looks alone, well, let's just say, never need to develop beyond their shallowness. If looks work, why bother having a personality? Look at Paris Hilton...granted, she's probably not after your money, but as much excess she's been granted in the looks department, she's sure been shorted in personality and brains. Seriously, how long can you date a woman who's only topic of conversation is "that's hot"...?


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