JuzBrowzn
recently joined
Reged: 07/13/07
Posts: 9
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I have filed for divorce and have decided to tell my STBX before he is served with the papers. The sheriff has called and asked when I want him to do it. Here is where I need your opinion. Should I have him served 30 min to 1 hour after I tell him or a day or 2 later? - I might not know where he is later.
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Drew
old hand
Reged: 07/30/07
Posts: 1017
Loc: somewhere more familiar
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You are answering your own question.
Do you really want to do this? Why is this issue a concern?
Is he violent?
If you won't know where he is later, you better just have him served at a time and location of your choosing (insuring that it is done) and be ready to talk/deal with him (or not) asap after he gets served.
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"living, learning, from my creator. you gave me life now show me how to live" c. cornell
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PhoenixRising
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 01/05/07
Posts: 3681
Loc: New York
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My EX had me served as my birthday present.
He stayed home that morning. Highly unusual for him. I kept questioning him about the way he was behaving. He kept lying through his teeth.
He wanted to make sure that I would be here to be served.
Getting served stinks no matter when or how you do it.
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Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. --Plato
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Drew
old hand
Reged: 07/30/07
Posts: 1017
Loc: somewhere more familiar
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I was served at the court house by her attorney and a bailiff, when I walked in to attempt to get a restraining order and file for temporary custody, walked right into it...........
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"living, learning, from my creator. you gave me life now show me how to live" c. cornell
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Karen1
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 1794
Loc: Ohio
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If you think your stbx might dodge being served... then don't tell him.
My EX left and I filed for divorce ( one that I did not want ) 20 months later. EX was so upset when the papers were served (not sure why) that he called off work. My guess is he was upset because he knew I was tired of playing around trying to come to agreements with him. ANd because he knew it was now going to actually cost him something.
I personally spoke with the procress server re: where to serve. My orders were as follows:
1. His apartment. I wanted this attempted 3 times.
2. If above failed, then on to OW's house for 2 attempts., only if one of his 2 vehicles were there.
3. As a very last resort... his place of employment.
I actually cried when I said that to the process server. I did not want to have to resort to #3. He was served on the first attempt. I have always been grateful for that. I agree in that it must suck to be served, no matter how it is done.
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"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened".
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