JuzBrowzn
recently joined
Reged: 07/13/07
Posts: 9
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In a previous post I described my marriage. My husband was controlling, did not respect or trust me. After MANY attempts to tell him what he was doing and how I was feeling and him not listening or turning everything back on me... I decided I could not live like that anymore and I filed for divorce. That was the best thing I have ever done. When I told him that I had filed he was totally shocked. We talked for atleast 2 days. I was able to tell him what he had been doing and how it made me feel. He actually listened and understood. I originally was not going to give in and try to work it out because he would never try before. But the shock of almost loosing me really opened his eyes. I am going to put the divorce on hold and we are going to go to counseling. He said to give him a couple of months and if he does not change or goes back the way he was I can have my divorce. As bad as it was (it was BAD)I still would like to save our marriage so I am giving the counseling a try. You would not believe the sincere change in him. He thanks me for serving him papers. He says that every year on that date he wants to celebrate like an anniversary. That's the day I opened his eyes and we started getting a fresh start on our relationship. We both have a long way to go to really be back in sinc with each other but I believe we can do it. He knows I am not afraid to follow though with the divorce if I am not treated the way I should be treated.
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Drew
old hand
Reged: 07/30/07
Posts: 1017
Loc: somewhere more familiar
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Congratulations!
I don't want to plant seeds of dissention or doubt but keep your eyes open. I have seen situations similar to yours where the spouse was cagey enough to use this as a tactic to buy time and "set up" the divorce scenario in their favor. I know that sounds terrible and I wouldn't want to make you doubt anything, just don't be blind or delusional.
I genuinely wish you two the best.
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"living, learning, from my creator. you gave me life now show me how to live" c. cornell
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ELEMO2001
journeyman
Reged: 07/18/07
Posts: 82
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Well congratulations!
Hope it works out well for you. I agree with Drew, my X was same way before, I'd filed for divorce the first time. He was emotionaly unavailable, not listening and just was not into our merriage. The minute I told him tha I'd filed for divorce, he was on his knee asking how for how he can change my mind and how our merriage was the most important to him, and so on and so on. Once I dismissed the case, thinking that it would turned out to be better than before, not even two months he went back to his old routine. So now i am on my second divorce from him and let me tell he his still tempting the same plea. I wish you the best and keep your eyes and ears open. but you never know he may really want to work it out too. lol
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yregna
veteran
Reged: 07/25/06
Posts: 1265
Loc: Oregon
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Quote " He knows I am not afraid to follow though with the divorce if I am not treated the way I should be treated. "
Let us all hope the guy is planning to get away from this princess with as much dough as possible. What are you, some kind of royalty ? You deserve to be treated like crap when you act like a B*&^H.
Just because guys want to bed down with you doesn't make you " special "...I feel nauseous....
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"Anything free is worth what you pay for it..."
"Climate is what we expect, weather is what we get"
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JuzBrowzn
recently joined
Reged: 07/13/07
Posts: 9
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I am not asking to be treated as royalty. I am wanting to be treated with RESPECT. Be treated as an adult not a child. And that is what I told him. I want to be an equal partner in our marriage. I have been hurt so many times by my husband's words and actions, I do not need to read that from you. Did you read any other part of my post?
Edited by JuzBrowzn (08/22/07 12:53 PM)
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ELEMO2001
journeyman
Reged: 07/18/07
Posts: 82
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TO yregna: how rude! she is just asking for insight and some understanding why do you have to be that rude? any way, whats wrong with wanting to be treated with love and respect? If her husband wants to change and treate her right I think that would be wonderful. JuzBrowzn, dont listen to this types of response. I thought this sight was to encourage. lol
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Relayer
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 03/13/07
Posts: 9506
Loc: Moorglade Mover
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I will say though that someone staying in a marriage out of fear the marriage will end is no way to live. You said he was controlling yet you did something that is horribly controlling..dont get it
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GO CUBBIES!!!!
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almostheaven
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
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In the context of internet culture, an internet troll, or simply troll in Internet slang, is someone who intentionally posts messages about sensitive topics constructed to cause controversy in an online community such as an online discussion forum or USENET groups in order to bait users into responding.[1]
Please ignore the troll that is yridiot...I mean, yregna.
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Char Fox
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Drew
old hand
Reged: 07/30/07
Posts: 1017
Loc: somewhere more familiar
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hahahahahahahahahaha, I mean LOL!!!!
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"living, learning, from my creator. you gave me life now show me how to live" c. cornell
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