Drew
old hand
Reged: 07/30/07
Posts: 1017
Loc: somewhere more familiar
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I was wondering, I have a personal opinion/notion/belief about telling children they are special.
I see so many children these days who seem to have a sense of entitlement. This predisposition that rules are for everyone else.
Do you tell your children that they are special?
Before anyone freaks, of course I have and do tell my children that they are special, special to me and their mother. I go on to clarify this to them with an explanation.
That being, that out in the world, they are who they are. No more and no less. They are subject to all the rules and laws of society, decency, and morality. I tell them that no one is special in the world at large.
I wanted to know how some of you guys/gals felt about this issue/observation.
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"living, learning, from my creator. you gave me life now show me how to live" c. cornell
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peace
member
Reged: 08/24/07
Posts: 146
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yes yes yes
i tell my son he is special all the time
I tell him is special to me and his father
YES YES children need to hear this all the time
I have a class of 22 students and I always tell them how special they are to me
How blessed I am ( yes in a public school i use blessed) TO have the opportunity to teach them and be part of their lives.
I believe u should hug ur children and tell them they are special every day!
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1004SRS
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 12/11/06
Posts: 5044
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Your kids are little like mine, aren't they?
I tell them how beautiful and wonderful and smart they are all the time. I tell them I love them more times in a day the you can count. DS1 loves sports and I compliment her when she makes a basket in the basketball hoop. DD4 loves building things and I compliment his structures a lot.
I also discipline them when needed.
They both have age appropriate chores. (DD puts the forks and spoons away out of the dishwasher. DS sets and cleans off the table after dinner with his sister helping. DS keeps the toys in his room picked up. They feed the cat together.)
I am told that I have excellent kids. DS's preschool teacher sent home a note about what a wonderful child I have raised.
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Patrice
addict
Reged: 07/21/06
Posts: 401
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You all make a lot of sense. I think kids have to be told (and shown) how special they are . . . to their parents. But I also agree that they need to be disciplined when they need it. Your point about entitlement is good Drew, I do see that in life and in the news when certain kids or even adults think the rules don't apply to them.
I also think as parents we also have the obligation to raise our children to be citizens of the world and to do their parts in making the world a better place: kindness, understanding of differences, empathy, generosity with their time/ talents/ monetary blessings, and "doing the right thing" are some of the things I hope I have impressed upon my children (who aren't really children anymore at 18 and 21).
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To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
Edited by Patrice (09/26/07 05:55 PM)
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c_jane
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 04/06/07
Posts: 1759
Loc: In the Great State of Texas
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I tell my son he's special. He's also book/learning smart (Thank G_D he took THAT from my side of the family -- as his dad is NOT book smart -- which is what you need in school). He started telling me from a young age how he 'knew' he was smarter than so-and-so because X,Y,Z.
SO....I ALSO tell him to NOT EVER think he's better than someone else, because even though he may do X better, there will always be something else that the OTHER PERSON can do better too.
I do NOT want to raise a 'stuck up' child because he knows he is smart. I want him to be humble too.
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John Constantine: God's a kid with an ant farm.... He's not planning anything.
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