Sean_S
recently joined
Reged: 12/02/07
Posts: 1
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Ok...
Just divorced in June... first XMAS coming up. Kids 9yo girl and 6yo boy. EX is resident parent. I agreed to (after arguing forever in mediation) having the kids from start of Winter school break until 10pm-ish on Christmas Eve and then she gets them from then to end of winter break.
There are two issues here:
1) Does Santa come to my house on the morning of Christmas Eve because he knows they won't be here on Xmas morning? I would like to see their faces when he brings them presents. (this is linked to issue 2)
2) Financially we are strapped and therefore we are splitting Santa presents therefore I want my half to be delivered to my house.
What have you heard, seen or done?
Thanks,
Sean
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1004SRS
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 12/11/06
Posts: 5044
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We have Christmas at my house.
I have no idea what X does on his time with the kids.
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Tweeby
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/05/04
Posts: 7100
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When my husband was the NCP, his ex would only allow him to have Christmas Eve. There are some parents, like Nurses and Doctors, that have to work on Christmas Day. Santa is magical and knows all. Santa knows where everyone is so for some families Santa shows up Christmas Eve in the morning and even for some he comes the Day after Christmas Day.
Santa is magical. That is why Santa has a Magic key that he can get into homes and apartments that do not have fire places?
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Avaya
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 02/09/06
Posts: 9824
Loc: Arkansas
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'Santa' came to our house for both kids on the 24th a.m. At the time, I thought that was best. Today I HATE it. My son has to compromise because SD's mother is selfish. Now that they're older, it's not such a huge deal I guess, but when they were younger, it was difficult for them to be so excited over what 'santa' brought them when most kids hadn't had 'santa' yet.
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Eternity is too long to be wrong.
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Tweeby
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/05/04
Posts: 7100
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I hated it also. At the time the kids were VERY young and my husband worked retail. So Santa would bring gifts and the kids would open one gift and have to wait until Dad came home. But we did what we could so that we could celebrate Christmas with ALL of the kids.
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c_jane
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 04/06/07
Posts: 1759
Loc: In the Great State of Texas
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Luckily (I guess) we split Christmas. One gets the morning until noon, then the other picks up son. We flip-flop every year. Unfortunately I did something really really dumb when we had our custody trial and Ex- got custody. His family ALL lives in the area & were used to having BIG Christmas Eve celebrations. My family didn't. In the interest of my son not missing those celebrations I gave in & said Ex- could have son EVERY Christmas Eve from 5-9 so he could celebrate at Grammy's house.
Grammy died 5 years ago. The family Christmas Eve celebrations stopped as no one else felt like hosting them. Now they just reserve a banquet room at some family restaurant & celebrate there. BUT.... Ex- is NOT willing to give up those FREE Christmas Eve's so he refused to budge on giving them up at our last Mod. hearing. So he STILL gets son EVERY Christmas Eve -- from now till Eternity I guess....
Bottom line, don't give up ANYTHING in writing/court that you don't want to. You can be 'nice' later & give it up on a case-by-case basis or when the mood strikes.
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John Constantine: God's a kid with an ant farm.... He's not planning anything.
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MTmom
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 08/23/07
Posts: 2711
Loc: MT
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I dislike Santa. I work very hard for my money... and I would rather ds appreciates that MOM delivered on Christmas rather than some fat man in a red suit.
DS still believes in Santa.. and so far has never asked why Santa doesn't stop at our house.. but I'll be darned if my sacrifices are credited to him!
I would suggest you do the same. Santa can come to your x's that's fine -- but they will know that what they get at your house is from YOU. That to me means more..
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PhoenixRising
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 01/05/07
Posts: 3681
Loc: New York
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My children were just about the same age as your children; the 1st year of my divorce.
Their father didn't do anything for them for xmas. He had never stepped into a store during our 20yr marriage; he wouldn't know how.
I had no job, no money. The kids got very little from me or santa. My parents and family help put little somethings under the tree.
The shocking thing? It didn't matter. The children had a great Christmas!
Christmas is magical. Kids don't sit w/ calculators and judge santa as stingy.
The kids want the magic. The putting up the tree, playing christmas carols, throwing so much tinsel on the tree that you can hardly see any greenery, having off from school and ripping paper off presents, even if the gifts are from the $.99 store.
If you are happy and excited your kids will be also. Tell the kids: Santa "knows all"; I am sure he will find a way for presents to be at both houses.
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Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. --Plato
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KentuckySm
old hand
Reged: 07/06/07
Posts: 773
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With my So his ex actually gave him every Christmas. She did not want them. ( Strange to me) But she has the boys til 9 pm Christmas Eve and then So has them for the next 2 days.
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Pick your battles.
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1004SRS
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 12/11/06
Posts: 5044
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Yeah - weird. The kids Dad doesn't want them on holidays. Okay..... None of them.
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