Achandler
recently joined
Reged: 01/22/08
Posts: 5
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Over a year ago my soon to be ex-wife stopped helping with household bills. For years she gave me a monthly amount to be used towards the bills. Over a year ago she decided she wanted to stop, and I did not consent to this. Now since we are about to work on our divorce, I know she is going to want half of the house that I put so much money in tryin to get fixed up. Like I stated she also stopped giving me money. She has worked a ton of overtime and has done nothing for the house.
Can I do anything to keep the house that I put the down paymenbt on and been going broke over.
Could this be consider abandonmnet or desertion?
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matilda
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 11/11/04
Posts: 2087
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Did she continue to live in the house the past year? Were you legally separated and have a written agreement as to her portion of the bills? Did she place her monies in an account that is considered marital property because you are still married? If yes, you might be entitled to half of those balances. What did you do when she stopped paying her portion a year ago? What justification could you provide the court for not seeking a legal remedy a year ago?
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Achandler
recently joined
Reged: 01/22/08
Posts: 5
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Yes she lived int he house. the only thing she pays is the electric bill and I had to make her do that. She does the shopping for food, which is like every two to three months. She has done everything she can not to contribut to the house.
We have separte accounts.
What could I do. My name is on the house so she can care less if it goes into foreclosure. We have two kids so I can't lose the home.
Please advise if I have a good argument to the courts. I'm in NJ.
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Achandler
recently joined
Reged: 01/22/08
Posts: 5
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Ther was no written agreement but she did say in an email, if I can find it, that she would start back giving me money once she started working overtime.
Can one spouse, after so many year with no change in circumstances just stop paying the bills. What can I do?
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Buckeye
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 12/08/05
Posts: 7857
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Yes, she can stop paying the bills. Yes, you can stop paying the bills. Then, you will both have to deal with the fall out.
Is there any reason why she isn't helping by paying the bills?
I think there is more to this story that you are telling us.
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Relayer
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 03/13/07
Posts: 9506
Loc: Moorglade Mover
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Quote:
Yes, she can stop paying the bills. Yes, you can stop paying the bills. Then, you will both have to deal with the fall out.
Is there any reason why she isn't helping by paying the bills?
I think there is more to this story that you are telling us.
Sure there is. His STBX was building a "war chest" for the last year in preperation for this divorce and needed the $$ for that instead of making her rightful contribution to the household and the support of her kids.
To the OP, since you did nothing once she stopping paying her share, there isn't a lot you can do except realize she probably has a sizable amount of $$ now to fight you in the courts.
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GO CUBBIES!!!!
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Achandler
recently joined
Reged: 01/22/08
Posts: 5
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I don't know waht else to say, buti feel trapped. Tried to do what is best for my family, but in the end a man is always screwed.
thanks for you coments.
If anyone knows of any case law that might be helpful please post.
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Susanf31
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 10630
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Hold on a sec. I've heard of many cases where the guy stopped paying the bills, leaving his wife and kids stuck. So please don't make this a gender thing.
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faith4two
newbie
Reged: 11/03/07
Posts: 46
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I agree with Susan. My STBX was self-employed, yet rarely contributed to the household expenses. He was insistent on having this [expensive] toy or that one. Hell, six weeks after our child was born, he put a $6,000 entertainment system in his truck saying "the kid will NEED this later down the road." The kid wasn't even FACING FORWARD yet!!! Yet for some reason, as a school age child, the kid is just fine in my car, which doesn't have a subwoofer, three screens, alpine speakers, sattelite radio, etc.
Meanwhile, I'm up to my THIRD lawsuit because he won't pay for a boat he's had access/possession to/of the past seven months, and refuses to give back to the bank - even going so far as to remove the VIN # off the trailer and cutting off electricity to the boat lift where it's housed the day they came to repossess it!
In divorce, I'm taken to court regularly to fund him (it's rarely about our child, unless it's his effort to maintain "status quo" of the toys and whatnot that were purchased before the child was born), even tho he makes more right now than I do!!!
No, this isn't a gender issue. And as I read many of the boards, I often feel they rarely they are. But maybe I'm just the exception rather than the rule.
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Relayer
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 03/13/07
Posts: 9506
Loc: Moorglade Mover
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Quote:
Hold on a sec. I've heard of many cases where the guy stopped paying the bills, leaving his wife and kids stuck. So please don't make this a gender thing.
Who made it a friggin gender thing? He said his ex-wife. I never said men don't do that also.
YOU just made it a gender thing.
As always.
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GO CUBBIES!!!!
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