BrittanyVL23
recently joined
Reged: 03/14/08
Posts: 8
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I am currently separated(we've been separated for just about 5 weeks) from my husband who is a Sgt. in the Army. We live in on post housing. Yesterday I received a phone call from his commander stating that my soon to be ex would be clearing housing on the 27th of March and I needed to make other arrangements. Is this even possible? I know my ex has an attorney, however I cannot afford one. I am a full time student and we have 2 children. Can his command call me, give me 2 weeks notice and then put us out on the street? I thought I had until 30 days after our divorce was finalized to vacate housing. I'm not really sure what to do. As you can imagine, I'm feeling just a little overwhelmed with the thought of having to pack an entire house, move it and figure out a place to live. What do I do???
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Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26793
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The reality is that he is required by regulation, and this differs by each service, to support you in a monetary amount equivalent to the BAH rate he receives, in the current situation, you are in military housing and that is the exact BAH rate. The service member is the one responsible for housing, he is held accountable. If he has decided to vacate housing, then he can do that, which means you cannot request your own housing. There are probably local exceptions to that, and you can find out about those from the local housing office, or JAG. If you hear anyone tell you that JAG cannot talk to you because he has already talked to them, that is simply not true, JAG is not representing him and you are asking for information only, there is no conflict of interests. Now, since he has decided to vacate housing and you will have to move, it does not remove his financial obligation to you. Once housing is vacated, he will need to give the BAH amount, until there is a court order determining a different amount. This is not a voluntary issue with the member, it is by regulation. You need to discuss this with your spouse and find out how this is going to work, he can pay you by allotment, by check, in cash, however it works, but in fairness to him, there should be a record of it, to protect his interests. That should not be an issue with you because it is basically a historical record that he is supporting you IAW the regulations. You have to figure out how and when this is going to happen. I don't know if the installation your on is doing the give and take with the BAH if you are in housing or the just give if you are not, but if he is not currently receiving BAH, then there may be a slight delay until it shows up on his LES. If yoru bills are tight, then I am not sure how anyone could pay their bills, and suddenly pay out a substantial amount in addition to, until they receive that money in their check. You should be able to work with the command, and figure out a way, there is always AER, which is just for such situation, and even ACS can point you in the right direction, and they have resources to help you, but it will be a difficult transition, and if you have any more questions, please ask and everyone here will do what they can to help. Best of luck.
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BrittanyVL23
recently joined
Reged: 03/14/08
Posts: 8
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The tricky part is the military protective order that was issued against him because he threatened to my life. So, I can't directly talk to him. His command has looked me in the face and lied to me over and over. I feel as though my hands are tied. He only wants me out of housing to hurt me. Yet, in the end he's really hurting his children. This is the regulation I found..."Occupants are ineligible to retain quarters when:
The Sponsor or dependents no longer reside permanently in quarters:
*30 consecutive days.
I may be reading that wrong, but to me that basically says I have the kids and although he isn't here his dependents are.
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Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26793
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That is just a portion of it, what that means is that if he was TDY/deployed, and signed for quarters, his family could stay there even if he is not, you could retain quarters if he was assigned on an unaccompanied tour. Just because there is a protective order, that does not mean he cannot give up quarters(there are always exceptions). What exactly are you saying they lied about, and what do you want to know????????
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BrittanyVL23
recently joined
Reged: 03/14/08
Posts: 8
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That regulation was part of the eviction/ineligibility section. A few weeks ago his platoon sergeant and some other guys came and got some more of his stuff. His platoon sgt asked me if I needed anything and was really nice to me. I had heard from another wife that my ex was saying he was signing the paperwork through his attorney to get me and the kids put out so I asked his platoon sgt and he said he knew nothing. But, looking back there was no way he didn't know. I understand the whole 'protect your own', but what about protecting 2 little girls. He is also set to deploy sometime in June. We are in Texas, is it even possible that he has enough time to get it finalized. He just left for JRTC a few days ago and won't be back until mid April.
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Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26793
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That is not a regulation, it is part of a regulation and it does not apply here. Again, that is to insure that no one can kick you out say.... if he went to Fort Polk for a month and someone decided that he is not living there and they need the quarters for another soldier, it is there to protect you in his absence. It has nothing to do with him voluntarily turning in his quarters. Now, his attorney has no bearing on this, as civilian law has nothign to do with eligibility for quarters, it is purely an Army/DOD issue, and he can termnate quarters whenever he wants, since he is the sponsor. You havelistened to other wives and that means it is strictly rumor, and since they say he is going through an attorney, that means they are somewhat off the mark. He CAN terminate housing, right now he gets BAH and it is taken out immediatedly and given to whomever manages the housing at Hood. That is his required support to you. When he terminates quarters, you are no longer getting that support, and he will have to give you the amount of his BAH. That is only true unless there is a court order saying a different amount, more or less, is to be paid as support. That has nothing to do with Child support. Once he turns in the quarters you are entitled by regulation to a support payment and he is required to give it to you, again, until a court order changes the amount, it is the equivalent of the BAH. You can do whatever you want with the money, say...... rent a house or apartment. it may get a little tricky because there may be a week or two turnaround until he gets the BAH in his account to give to you (paperwork takes time). There was no reason for him to tell his PSG he was vacating quarters unless he wanted to tell him, his PSG had a point of contact, and was aware of the general situation at a minimum, but other than that, he may not have known. His PSG was not only protecting his own, his actions were a result of the Chain of Command protecting you and 2 little girls as well. In the military, a protection order may be nothng more than a verbal order to not go home unless accompanied by a memeber of the Chain of Command or NCO support channel or it may have been a verbal order to not go home at all and to have someone go there if he wanted anything. The verbal lawful orders have as much weight as a civilian protection order. You need to call housing and find out the specific procedure to clear housing, I know in some places, he can have the amount of the cleaning team taken out of his check, and as long as the house is empty, they will clear him, or he may have to be there with a contract from the cleaning team to prove he paid to have the quarters cleaned. He may have already done this, and that is what the Command was telling you, but it is not as simple as that. You need to find out from housing, and explain the situation, the seperation, the call from the command and anything else to help them get a picture of what is going on. Once you find that out, you can contact his rear D and explain theh situation about no place to live, and they will take action, it may be delaying the clearing of quarters until he gets back from LA. or it may involve bringing him back from LA, (a 6-7 hour drive) to get this taken care of, in either case, no one will leave you high and dry. There is also AER that will help with emergency expenses, and ACS has a huge amount of resources to include either food on hand or vouchers to pick up food. You need to understand this. The Army does not want to kick you out, they will not leave you high and dry, you are a part of "their own" and they will take care of you. it may not be exactly what you want, but you will have a place to stay, and enough to eat until this can be resolved. The chain of Command will not be happy with this SGT if he went to JRTC and left these kind of loose ends for someone else to deal with. The Army will not protect him from his responsibilities, they will ensure he meets them. This is not as bad as it seems right now, but this is the easy part, the hard part will come with the divorce proceedings, but as it stands right now, you are a spouse, a part of the team, and until that changes, you have all the same rights as any spouse, no matter what anyone would like to tell you. Be strong ( I won't say "be Army strong). It does nto sound like anyone has lied to you, it sounds like the rumor mill is in full operation, but beware of the "I heards", they are alot different than "I knows" I hope that explained it better. If you run into problems finding out anything let me know, I can find any numbers you need, and even how to contact him at FT. Polk, i was there for 14 years and just retired from there as a DOD contractor in August.
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BrittanyVL23
recently joined
Reged: 03/14/08
Posts: 8
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First thing Monday morning I am going down to talk to housing. I had a call in with who ever the head guy is, but I haven't heard back yet. The protection order was put in place because I talked to an advocate on post about a statement he had made to me. It's an actual document that's on file with his command, the MP's and he was given a copy. There will be a ruling on that case with the military in early May. I don't think that housing is aware of the real situation going on. I know that I shouldn't assume things, but I believe that he went down to housing and just said 'we're moving out this month' and that was it. I'm just trying to do what's best for my children so they don't end up going without.
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Redlegg
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Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26793
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I am guessing you went through the Family advocacy. There can be a written order, and it is from his commander, based upon the case as presented to him by the family advocacy counsel. You should have been given a copy, you should read up on the following regulation, it covers exactly what you are talking about, and it even discusses removal of family members from housing on order to protect them. As you read teh article, i think you will see that the Army is actually only on the side of protecting everyone involved and resolving the situation so no one gets hurt. If he has not presented his side, he will have a chance to do that, the regulation explains the ex parte type of order where one person makes a statement and an immediate order is issued. he may have told housing that he plans to vacate, but you have to ask the questions at housing about what is authorized and what is not. If you have not talked to family advocacy, you need to monday morning, they will help you, if they are not already.You are entitled to support, i think the big question right now is whether that will be a set of quarters or the BAH payment. I hope this has all helped clear it up, if not, feel free to ask more and i will keep trying, if you need phone numbers or names, let me know and i will do everything I can to help you resolve your questions.
The regulation can be found here:
http://www.usarec.army.mil/hq/HRD/FAP/AR608_18_x.pdf
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BrittanyVL23
recently joined
Reged: 03/14/08
Posts: 8
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Thank you for being so helpful. I really do appreciate it.
His commander called me this morning and said they had extended the clearing date to the middle of April, so that gives me a little bit more time. He also mentioned that my ex has a court date this week and will be coming back from JRTC for that. I have no idea what this court date is for. I told his commander that I had no idea how far along the divorce was because I haven't even been served. His response to that was that my ex wanted to get a division of property. We have 2 cars. He is driving the one that is paid off, I am driving the one that isn't. The one I have is the family car, which I don't think I should have to give back right now since I have the 2 kids. His is a 2 door, older car. He also mentioned the desktop that I have. It was actually purchased for me when my ex went to Iraq this last time. He bought himself a laptop which he managed to break and now he's requesting the desktop even though he has another laptop. I don't have proof that it was a gift, so I'm not really sure how that's going to pan out in the end. What possible court hearing could he have? I've heard he's trying to get custody, but he has no grounds to take them from me. I have an absolutely perfect criminal record, not so much as a traffic violation. Until January I had been a SAHM. He's gone a lot because of the Army. I've never been investigated by CPS. Nothing. Is it just a shot in the dark for him, or is it an actual possibility? Not knowing what's going on is making me a little anxious. I'm going out of town tomorrow and won't be back for a week. I guess the first thing I'll do when I get back is get an attorney. I probably should have done that when this all started happening, but I didn't actually think he would jump on the divorce so quickly. In all honesty I want this to me amicable, I want him to be an active part of my daughters life and I know that at some point we're going to have to develop a healthy co-parenting relationship. He's not a horrible guy, he just needs some counseling to deal with his anger issues and his dark past.
Tomorrow before I leave I'm going to the housing office on post to see exactly where I stand and what my rights in this whole thing are.
Thank you again for being so helpful
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Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26793
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I hope it works out for both of, but if you need any help let me know. others can give you more help with the custody and property issues, try the other topic boards and you will get some help, great people here with a huge amount of knowledge and experience.
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