Start Your Divorce Today - Premium Divorce Online


Divorce Source Community Forums >> Military Divorce

Jump to first unread post. Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | >> (show all)
shortmarriage
Pooh-Bah
**

Reged: 12/07/08
Posts: 1773
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: sadinwi]
      #503978 - 02/16/09 05:58 PM

Your heart is broken. But, you need to be thinking this through, because how you move forward will affect you for years to come.

A doctor/therapist would be very helpful to you now. Have you taken meds before? Sleeping and eating are very helpful! Exercise. Talk to friends, family, and us on here. Time is the best healer of all, I think. Just take one day at a time.

Being angry, hurt, resentful, sad, lonely and all the other feelings you’re feeling are perfectly normal. It's ok to have those feelings, but it's totally different to act on them. Eventually, you’ll realize that being angry and wanting revenge to hurt the other person will do you no good. You must do what's best for you and your child.


Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
sadinwi
recently joined


Reged: 02/16/09
Posts: 15
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: Redlegg]
      #503989 - 02/16/09 06:55 PM

Wow, 5 years and you still come to the divorce forum? Do you still need the support from the site or are you just lending a hand to crazy people like me?

How long does it take to stop hating being alone every night and every morning?


Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
sadinwi
recently joined


Reged: 02/16/09
Posts: 15
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: shortmarriage]
      #503996 - 02/16/09 07:15 PM

SM - I've never taken any meds before. Before all this, I think I was a pretty normal person. ;) What do I even ask for? I've lost 20 pounds since the middle of Jan and am down to about 145. It's crazy...how it comes off without even trying all the sudden...guess I can thank him for that.

I do know in my head that I need to stop feeling/acting this way. My emotions just get the better of me and I lose my mind...


Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
**

Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 27312
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: sadinwi]
      #503997 - 02/16/09 07:17 PM

Crazy like you, ha, your an amateur :) just read up and you will see, normal is relative and there is no recipe. Its a good group of people. It grows on you and you will see so many things from differnt perspectives. And every once in awhile you actually do get to help someone and all together that makes it worth coming back to.

Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
shortmarriage
Pooh-Bah
**

Reged: 12/07/08
Posts: 1773
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: sadinwi]
      #504000 - 02/16/09 07:41 PM

I just sent you a private message. Did you get it?

Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Miranda
Carpal \'Tunnel
**

Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 20822
Loc: North of Mexico
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: sadinwi]
      #504006 - 02/16/09 08:25 PM

I am so 24 :0)...

I divorced in 1996 when I was active and my then husband was just released from active duty after 15 years (idiot). Anyhoo you will go on and feel better but it is tough at first. I still hate my ex though...luckily we rarely talk and we live 600 miles apart:)My son is now at the age where he can communicate with my ex without me having to dial or pick up a phone! It is fabulous.

I wish my ex was still active, that way I could have been guaranteed some child support. Enforcing support in the civilian world when one parent will do anything to aviod paying is TOUGH! That is why I said look at the big picutre. At some point you will stop caring who he is bedding and worry more about your child's financial and medical well being. (not that you don't already)

--------------------
13.1...because I am only half crazy!


Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
jsp
Carpal \'Tunnel
**

Reged: 09/30/05
Posts: 4197
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: Miranda]
      #504009 - 02/16/09 08:59 PM

Your're getting good advice - my husband was cheated on when he was active duty - his wife and good friend (who was active duty) - husband in Korea - took him years to trust again... then I came along... I know this sounds strange, but I have to admit, I'm so greatful for what she did and the fact she left or I never would have gotten such a wonderful, loving husband. Hang in there! Divorce him - once a cheater, always a cheater (or at least in my mind). Support him in being a father as cheating and being a parent are two seperate issues and your child needs a father. Support his military career for the benefits and child support. And, take the time to grieve and morn the loss of youru marriage, but, luckily you are very young and still have plenty of time left to get remarried and have a wonderful life ahead of you even though it doesn't feel like it right now. (My husband said he'd never get married again <g> - guess I messed that up for him).

Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
sadinwi
recently joined


Reged: 02/16/09
Posts: 15
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: jsp]
      #504059 - 02/17/09 07:28 AM

I just don't get this whole time will make me feel better stuff. When will that start to kick in? I have literally been up for like 48 hours. I am so tired but when I shut my eyes and I can't stop my mind from thinking about everything and breaking down all over again. I even took night quill last night and I still didn't sleep. (Did a lot of throwing up for taking that on an empty stomach...) I just hate this. I want to hurt him as bad as he's hurting me...

Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
**

Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 27312
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: sadinwi]
      #504064 - 02/17/09 08:18 AM

You do don't you. I have been there. It is not easy, you have to start just getting through the day. I didn't sleep, I barely ate, I even washed every wall in the house by hand. You think it doesn't help, but it does. Take a walk, just do things. it won't take your mind off it, but it does help. It is going to hurt, and pretty bad. The good news is that just means your normal. Did the sun come up this morning???????

Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
sadinwi
recently joined


Reged: 02/16/09
Posts: 15
Re: Please read! Need military advice! [Re: Redlegg]
      #504171 - 02/17/09 12:39 PM

Somehow the sun did come up this morning, although only after me being up the entire night waiting for it. I don't understand how someone can be SOOO tired but not able to sleep.

Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | >> (show all)



Extra information
0 registered and 1 anonymous users are browsing this forum.

Moderator:  dsAdmin 

Print Topic

Forum Permissions
      You cannot start new topics
      You cannot reply to topics
      HTML is disabled
      UBBCode is disabled

Rating:
Topic views: 10095

Rate this topic

Jump to

Contact Us Divorce Source Home

*
UBB.threads™ 6.5.1.1


Resources & Tools
Start Your Divorce Online Start Your Divorce
Several Options to Get Started Today.
Divorce Tools Online Divorce Tools
Keeping it Simple to Get the Job Done.
Divorce Downloads Download Center
Instantly Download Books, Guides & Forms.
Divorce and Custody Books Discount Books
Over 100 of the Best Divorce & Custody Books.
Negotiate Online Negotiate Online
Settle your Divorce and Save.
Custody and Support Tracking Custody Scheduling
Make Sure You Document Everything.

Easily Connect With a Lawyer or Mediator
Have Divorce Professionals from Your Area Contact You!
Enter Your Zip Code: