sweetestlove
newbie
Reged: 04/20/09
Posts: 37
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I was abusive by my boyfriend I meet him through online dating. We only meet two months, he was trying force to get me pregnant and did. I slowly realized about him. He always bad mouthing of everything about me.
He keep saying go ahead hit me, turn me on! He love to make me mad so I became aggressive toward him. He always hurting my little Papillion and laughs. I find it was not funny. I tried to stop him doing that. I don’t enjoy that. Next things, he keep on poking me all the time. I became very angry toward him because he would not stop hurting me by damage left knee, hurt my hands by squeeze, name calling, control of what I should or not, few time he ordered his dog to attack(DID BITE few time!)and laughs at me, insulting all the time, ignoring me whatever problems, financial abuse of my credit card(close to 10,000) forcing to move in and live with his parents house.
We have a child together but we are not married. He work as long haul truck driver. When he is home but he is not home at all because he was too busy to focus on trains things or do other thing to keep busy and avoid us. He did not want to dealing with our son until he is growing up older and he did not spend anything for our son (two year in row no Christmas for him) even through he spends avg 600 to 1,000 monthly on trains for himself. I am the one who spend everything for our son's need and take care of him the entire of our son by myself. He refused to help me at all not even carry car seat! I was so full of hurt and so full of angry.
I learned that I am sole custody of our son and I can move anywhere I want to be near my daughter. He have no right to force me to stay! Threaten me! There is a very good reason to move because our son and I live in with his parents house are not stable, his(abusive)stepfather was trying to harm to end life with his wife and possible harm our son and me. There have been going on lately with records. I do not feel safe to stay with them. I have all those conversation through email I saved including my boyfriend's bad mouthing and controlling.
I decide it was the best interest for our son is to live close by our son's big sister because she was very actively to be with her little brother by visiting him three time in a year, work at daycare and attend college to earn certicate to become assistant teacher to little kids. I see how big difference between my daughter and son's grandparent. His grandmother is currently take heavy pills and sleepy a lot while his grandfather is verbal abusive and controlling her and had serious Alzheimer illness...very moody and yelling all the time. His stepfather is now 75 and his mother is 65 and both are in serious health problems. He wanted a house for himself with full of basement to built train layout.
So, He is trying to get full custody of our son by quitting his long haul truck within approx 30 day from now and become self employment as caretaker of his stepfather because his mother can not deal with him anymore. I would not let our son live in that place!
I do have evidence emails everything! He can not have full custody of our son, I never count on child support anyway! He said He don't want to spend every Christmas or Thanksgiving with our son, he also don’t want to spend with our son for this summer and next summer! I am holding this evidence against him as well. He can not have full custody but he is fighting?! Can he take our son away from me because I move away from Iowa to SC? He have no interest in our son the entire of our son's time!
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Yes_Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 08/23/08
Posts: 7406
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[quote]
I learned that I am sole custody of our son and I can move anywhere I want to be near my daughter. [/quote]
Wrong
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Maury
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 8146
Loc: This Asylum --->
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" . . .he was trying force to get me pregnant."
If you are an adult, how does someone "force" you to get pregnant?
"He love to make me mad so I became aggressive toward him."
If you make the confrontation physical and cannot control your emotions, that may make you an abuser, not the person who you attacked. No provocation is considered sufficient to warrant a physical attack.
The bottom line appears to be that you and your boyfriend have a bad relationshiop. However, it would appear that you both bear the blame for it and you are at least as abusive as you accuse him of being.
If there has been no order determining custody or parenting time, you are correct that there is nothing that precludes you from moving out with the child. However, the father may file an action to determine custody and parenting time in court and seek to return the child to the family home. Whether that occurs may depend on any number of factors. Certainly, if he is an over the road truck driver and, as a result, is away much, an award of temporary custody to you may be likely. If you try to move out of state, it is far more likely that a court would order the child returned to the original forum state until custody and parentiung issus can be decided.
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century7
newbie
Reged: 04/13/09
Posts: 44
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He is right.....
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century7
newbie
Reged: 04/13/09
Posts: 44
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Hi Lorri and Alisha
Edited by century7 (04/29/09 12:27 PM)
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century7
newbie
Reged: 04/13/09
Posts: 44
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I didnt ask her to stay but I want my son to stay in Iowa.. She is free to go anywhere she wish to go..but my son isnt...
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century7
newbie
Reged: 04/13/09
Posts: 44
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Bad news is I am selling my trains off to help pay for legal matters for my son. My trains was for me and my son..whatever she thinks what I spends..wrong. I paid housing, utlitites, etc. But She has her own income damn!! 1,057 and son's 528.00 ssdi and ssi.. wow !!So ..I just focused on paying housing, utilities close to 800-1,000 monthly while she pays nothing.. So I make her to pay something take care of our son..nothing is free out there..
Edited by century7 (04/29/09 12:40 PM)
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sweetestlove
newbie
Reged: 04/20/09
Posts: 37
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I never agreed to live with his parent. Everything was hers space....I am not let you take advatage of me to pay and I will never be part of it when I am just your girlfriend and you can get away from it.
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century7
newbie
Reged: 04/13/09
Posts: 44
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easy now... getting too emotional now.. mediating now!!
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century7
newbie
Reged: 04/13/09
Posts: 44
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well My son is one year and half. It is hard what can I do with him when I need to do things around the house, like recently replacing broken hot water heater spent all day on that. But my son needs mommmy most of time.... My favorite to say. "when Mommy mad Daddy hide in basement!"
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