candlelight123
recently joined
Reged: 12/14/09
Posts: 4
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We waited until child #1 went off to college, leaving 2 freshmen in high school at home. My situation: spouse was earning over 6 figures as a software engineer up until 8 years ago when he was layed off. Since then, he's been self-employed, earning $20-40k, working only when someone calls him. Says the economy is bad and he can't work, can't find a job-- has both a contractor's license and software skills. I earn $135k (only in the last year-- earned about $100k prior). He's 62, I'm in my 50's.
Our quality of life has been not great, as he also failed to work on our house while not employed.... I'd be interested in anyone's feedback on how I might be impacted support wise.
I'm wondering if I can get hit with permanent spousal support due to his age? He is telling me that he now can't get a job because no one will hire someone close to retirement. Essentially, he hasn't worked 8 years of a 19 year marriage-- will a judge look at that? We're headed to mediation to attempt to resolve. In the meantime, I'm paying for everything since I don't want to put him out on the street-- it's been 3 months since we separated and he's still not working.......
Thanks
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finz
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/17/08
Posts: 6462
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Start gathering up ads from the paper and any info you can about companies that are hiring in either of his fields and the salary ranges. He would have to prove to the court that he has been aggressively looking for a job and can't get one.
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Miranda
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 20822
Loc: North of Mexico
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I think you are going to be on the hook for spousal support. Given his age and the horrible state you live in (divorce wise), you may be made to pay for a long time.
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13.1...because I am only half crazy!
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1966Gal
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 04/04/08
Posts: 10098
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I agree with Miranda. He hasn't worked in his field for 8 years. He's a dinosaur in that technology and he's older. Two whammies against him. You are now making $135k to his $20 - $40. You don't say how long you've been married, but based on the age of your kids, I'm guessing 20+ years.
You might be looking at lifetime alimony. You will need a very good lawyer. What kind of assets do you have to split? Retirement accounts, etc...?
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The Gov cannot give anything to anyone - that they have not first taken away from someone else.
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Miranda
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/02/05
Posts: 20822
Loc: North of Mexico
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It says in the title 19 year marriage.
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13.1...because I am only half crazy!
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1966Gal
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 04/04/08
Posts: 10098
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Oh yea...duh. :)
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The Gov cannot give anything to anyone - that they have not first taken away from someone else.
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candlelight123
recently joined
Reged: 12/14/09
Posts: 4
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Him: 401k is $200k, and he will soon inherit $1M plus
House: $300k in equity
Me: 401k is $68k
Looks like I'll have to pay until he inherits money from mommy-- which i believe is what he's been waiting for all these years.....
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1966Gal
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 04/04/08
Posts: 10098
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Don't divorce him until he inherits that money! DELAY the divorce until he has the money in hand. It will changed everything about your settlement.
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The Gov cannot give anything to anyone - that they have not first taken away from someone else.
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googledad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 12/31/05
Posts: 10207
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Really ? How ? His inheritance is nonmarital and they live in a community property state .
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Careful. We don't want to learn from this.
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1966Gal
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 04/04/08
Posts: 10098
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Really ? How ? His inheritance is nonmarital and they live in a community property state .
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Simple. They look at his "need" when determining alimony. They will look at all assets available to him when determining his "need". If he has $1 mil more than she does, it is very, very doubtful she'll be ordered to pay anything.
However, she has to wait until he has the money in-hand. They won't consider money he may or may not receive at some unknown point in the future.
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The Gov cannot give anything to anyone - that they have not first taken away from someone else.
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