shadow
recently joined
Reged: 01/12/06
Posts: 13
Loc: Coast of NC
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Just thought I would update you all on my meeting with XSO last night. After joining this board, my outlook on things has brightened considerably.
When XSO suggested we mix our "business" meeting with dinner - I thought, why not? Of course it was at his house - and yes, of course I grilled the steaks. He did make the salad though. After eating dinner and a dessert of oreo's We discussed what needed to be done to finish the web site we were meeting about. When we were finished talking "business" - M looked at me and asked "Wanta get naked or should I take you home?" I am so proud of myself - I did not even hesitate to say - "You need to take me home". He just said "ok". There was some small talk on the ride home, when I got out of the car I thanked him for dinner and came into the house.
I have had a smile on my face all day. How can he think he can have it both ways? (shaking my head)
I must admint though that it was nice to be in "my" house again - if only for a few hours. We both enjoyed dinner too - I know I haven't cooked anything that won't go in the microwave in months. I am glad I went, glad I declined, and was glad to get home.
k
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ginni
addict
 
Reged: 06/06/05
Posts: 478
Loc: second star to the right and s...
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the more power you take back the better you will feel.
I've been in the situation you were in...and it honestly made me sick to my stomach that he could be so flippant. I realized then intimacy was not about love, but carnality...and he could find that anywhere, but chose to try and defile me...and that's what it was...it was not love...it was something else.
I also know the, "There's no place like home," feeling. I was in a relationship that was toxic from the get-go...but was going through so many other very bad things in my life, the toxic bouy was better than treading dangerous waters...or so I thought...the reality of it all was the depth was only two feet...had I put my feet down long enough I would have realized I could have stood on my own with no problem.
I remember toward the end how grateful I was to lock my door, turn on the computer and see the names and posts of those here/and long gone...and feel safe; breathing a sigh of relief.
Although it hurt...I am so glad I was brave enough to end that time in my life...sanity in tact...and although it still hurts...Fruit Loops has helped alot.
Love always, ginni
-------------------- Mommie? I love you more than bacon. AYL-01/20/2006
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Debi
Carpal \'Tunnel

Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 6346
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It's the little victories that matter most. You should have a smile on your face for being the strong wonderful woman that you are. I now propose a toast to "Fruit Loops!" (definitely better than bland old cheerios)
-------------------- When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.
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shadow
recently joined
Reged: 01/12/06
Posts: 13
Loc: Coast of NC
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Thank you - and to think I used to like Trix better than fruit loops...lol
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ginni
addict
 
Reged: 06/06/05
Posts: 478
Loc: second star to the right and s...
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Trix are for KIDS!
This man at Church the other day was telling me about quitting smoking and how he was lead to a scripture in 1st Corinthians that talked about doing away with those things from when you were a child.
This sort of goes with it...Out with the Trix (are for kids) and onto Fruit Loops (for Adults)!
Love always, Toucan ginni
-------------------- Mommie? I love you more than bacon. AYL-01/20/2006
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