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browneyebabygirl
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Reged: 05/14/10
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Spouse Stall Tactics
      #661192 - 05/14/10 08:52 PM

My friend is currently sueing for divorce. He is in the Army for 19 years. He has been married the whole time, however, the wife left him 10 years ago for another man and had a baby by the other man. He has three kids with her, but have them living with him. She was involved with a younger man after the other man left her. Her mom called the husband several times to get the kids and complained about her being unfit etc. He finally brought them to Texas to live and their grades went up. The mom is a diabetic and cared more about the 19 year old boyfriend instead of her health. She end up in the hospital getting one leg cut off. He never stop paying her for child support until now. He still send her money by military law. He has sent several papers for divorce and they keep throwing them away. Now they moved and did not tell him where. The kids gave him a address, so he sent papers to have her served. She wants to wait until his 20 year mark for the retirement and insurance. Will she get the 50% even if she left him for another man? Now it looks like she want the kids back since she and her mom have bought a 5 bedroom house and they need the child support to pay for it. Neither one is working they have money coming in from different places like SSN or whatever.

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Redlegg
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: browneyebabygirl]
      #661235 - 05/15/10 07:40 AM

The only thng you can look at is the USFSPA. It allows the states to divide military retirement as property. They do have recommended formulas, and they explain how DFAS will treat certain orders, and what they need. There is no set way on the division. It is up to the judge. Generally the longer the marriage, the higher the percentage. You can look up past cases in your state, or county, and maybe get an idea, or contact a lawyer who has dealt with it before.

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Happy Birthday Miranda
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: browneyebabygirl]
      #661240 - 05/15/10 08:50 AM

Why did he wait 10 years to divorce her? That is the problem, of course she is going to stall because now she could get lifetime benefits from Uncle Sam.

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13.1...because I am only half crazy!

Edited by Miranda (05/15/10 08:50 AM)


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1004SRS
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: Miranda]
      #663350 - 05/26/10 05:18 AM

hmmm. He got more money that way, but now he has a friend and wants to get married.

He's not tleling his friend the entire story, I bet. There is no way, that he sent her divorce papers and she just threw them away. WHy was a lawyer not involved? What about filing them with the court along with the Return Receipt Requested?


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elliesmom
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: 1004SRS]
      #663442 - 05/26/10 11:18 AM

That would be how you do it if you are filing a stipulated (we agree on everything) decree. But yeah he is not the sharpest tool in the shed. But I have met plenty of people that way. Don't do anything, worry about anything, until they have to. Inertia people. They tend to only be successful in the military - because that is one of the few places where everything really is a "have to" and not a "should - if you want to keep your job."

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Forgiveness is...letting go of the hope that the past can be changed.

Edited by elliesmom (05/26/10 11:19 AM)


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1004SRS
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: elliesmom]
      #663614 - 05/26/10 07:35 PM

I hired an attorney and filed for divorce through the courts. She sent him RRR the paperwork. He, then, hired his own attorney.

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browneyebabygirl
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: 1004SRS]
      #667340 - 06/11/10 02:59 PM

Thanks to everyone that answered. I think I left this too wide open for the wrong ideas to be gathered. She left him in Germany and moved back to the states. He still was in love with her for many years. However, she wanted younger men that were 19 years of age. Coming back up to speed. It was told to him by her own family member that her mom is throwing away the papers. SO, now he have had her served and waits for a response. He don't care about giving her some of his retirement, he just want it over and done with. But her and her mom don't want it over until the 20 year mark. He is a good man and have always (always) supported her $900 a mth, even when she was living with several different men. Even after he got all the kids living with him, he still sent her the $900 a mth. He is not dumb by no means, he just wanted his family, but she did not. NOW he want to be free, even if he has found someone or not, he gave his all to the end. To me that is a good man.

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1004SRS
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: browneyebabygirl]
      #667385 - 06/11/10 06:50 PM

Just curious - how old are you?

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browneyebabygirl
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: 1004SRS]
      #668336 - 06/15/10 04:35 PM

I am 41.

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browneyebabygirl
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Re: Spouse Stall Tactics [Re: browneyebabygirl]
      #668338 - 06/15/10 04:38 PM

1004SRS, I forgot to answer some of your questions.

"WHy was a lawyer not involved? What about filing them with the court along with the Return Receipt Requested?"

A lawyer has been involved from the beginning. The lawyer was the one sending the paperwork. Once he found out that her mom was distroying the papers, he had to have a sheriff serve her.


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