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MJenkins
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Reged: 10/07/10
Posts: 201
Re: Morality Clause [Re: MrsB]
      #696496 - 10/10/10 11:08 AM

She's 2 years old. They don't have a CO. He gets her every other weekend, And I think they split the big holidays.

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If you can't beat em, they're not tied down properly.


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Avaya
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Reged: 02/09/06
Posts: 9846
Loc: Arkansas
Re: Morality Clause [Re: MJenkins]
      #696562 - 10/11/10 08:44 AM

Quote:

We've been living together for a year. It's actually MY apt, though when this lease is up, we intend to get another place with both of our names on the lease.




Bad idea IMO, shack-ups with children involved and bothersome ex's don't have much longevity and there's no need to complicate it further by having a lease that you wont be able to get out of.

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MrsB
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Re: Morality Clause [Re: Avaya]
      #696563 - 10/11/10 08:45 AM

Worked fine for DH and me before we married.

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Avaya
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Re: Morality Clause [Re: MrsB]
      #696564 - 10/11/10 08:46 AM

sure, encourage immorality. Good idea.

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MJenkins
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Re: Morality Clause [Re: Avaya]
      #696671 - 10/11/10 03:34 PM

Having both our names on the lease isn't a problem...if we were to break up, he'd move out, and I'd be able to pay the bills...I'd never move somewhere I couldn't afford on my own. Immorality is a matter of opinion, lol. And there really is no way I'd rush into marriage, or marry someone without living together first.
As always, thank you for your responses. Any info is greatly appreciated.

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If you can't beat em, they're not tied down properly.


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Avaya
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Re: Morality Clause [Re: MJenkins]
      #696833 - 10/12/10 08:34 AM

Quote:

Having both our names on the lease isn't a problem...if we were to break up, he'd move out, and I'd be able to pay the bills...I'd never move somewhere I couldn't afford on my own.




It's sweet that you believe that, and I'm not saying that it couldn't happen, however people 'in love' often make poor decisions. If you're not willing to marry this person, you already don't know them well enough (or know them too well?) to make big decisions that could negatively affect you down the road. It's easy to agree to what you'd do while you like each other. When one of you cheats, or lies, or lets an ex cross boundaries, or becomes an alcoholic, or gives the other a black eye, or spends all the bill money on cigarettes or drugs......you get the jist, rational decisions and 'what we agreed to' just might not be what actually happens.

I assume you're grown, just be careful. CLEARLY life doesn't turn out how we thought it would at some point.

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finz
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Re: Morality Clause [Re: Avaya]
      #696861 - 10/12/10 10:14 AM

Why is it 'sweet' for her to know that she can afford the apartment on her own if the relationship doesn't work out ?

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Avaya
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Re: Morality Clause [Re: finz]
      #696883 - 10/12/10 10:44 AM

Quote:

Why is it 'sweet' for her to know that she can afford the apartment on her own if the relationship doesn't work out ?




The entire statement I quoted, taken as a whole, is what I was saying is sweet.

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finz
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Re: Morality Clause [Re: Avaya]
      #696892 - 10/12/10 10:58 AM

I don't think saying the entire quote is 'sweet' makes any sense.

It looks like you are trying to be condesending (implying that she is soooo sure this relationship will end happily ever after) and failed miserably because she is saying she will adjust if he were to skip out on paying the rent.


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MJenkins
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Re: Morality Clause [Re: finz]
      #697488 - 10/13/10 05:02 PM

Lol, you guys. Living together doesn't have as much to do with being in love as people have been conditioned to think. I won't go into the intricasies of why, but rent/bills aren't a concern in the event of a breakup, and it really woullld be that simple. Emotionally it would be hard. But the tangible concrete aspects would be simple and mess-free. Either way, I don't see a breakup anytime soon.

It's not that I'm not willing to marry him...but I see no rush and neither does he. It's not indicative of how we feel about each other...it's a legal agreement...that shouldn't be taken lightly, or used as a quick fix.
All that aside, BM has been laying low, so she's either plotting, or giving it a rest because she doesn't have grounds to have any restrictions placed on him.

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If you can't beat em, they're not tied down properly.


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