Start Your Divorce Today - Premium Divorce Online


Divorce Source Community Forums >> Child Custody and Visitation

Jump to first unread post. Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | (show all)
SamsDad
journeyman


Reged: 04/29/10
Posts: 79
Re: nothing can be done? [Re: annatof4]
      #755550 - 07/13/11 06:47 PM

Debi - we are so on the same page on this one. I have done a lot of thinking since I originally posted and along with input from friends and family (and knowing her history) I feel as though it might just naturally work out in my favor. Like I said, I don't WANT to remove our child from her mother but if her mother willingly allows her alloted time with our child to be given to me, I couldn't be happier.

Buckeye - that's the word on the street! It's virtually impossible to get sole custody with an opposing parent unless there are drug, abandonment, or abuse issues. Sad.

Annatof4 - I have not even heard of what you are talking about but I will definitely look into it! Thanks for the info.

A perk in the situtation was today, I picked up my daughter from the ex's new boyfriend and baby's-daddy' house (where they are now living) and my daughter said "daddy, are we going home?" She referred to the place she just came from as ***'s house several times throughout our morning chat...and that she was coming "home". It warmed my heart and gave me a little light amidst the darkness I feel most days when I she isn't with me. It made me feel that no matter how hard my ex tried to manipulate a house or a baby or a man into a family - my baby girl will always know where home is.


Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
annatof4
member
**

Reged: 07/13/11
Posts: 125
Re: nothing can be done? [Re: SamsDad]
      #755638 - 07/14/11 09:37 AM

Hmmm, maybe they dont offer it in your state/area. I would think that every court would have some type of mediation to not constantly involve the courts in problem resolution matters.

It is sad that your child has to go through this. But, you giving her the stability that she needs is all you can do. From your most recent, it appears that you are giving her that. Sometimes, you cant control how the other parent chooses to behave. It is a hard thing to let go and say "I am doing the best that I can, with what I have".

Also as a side note, please keep in mind that your child is 50% you and 50% the other parent. No matter how you wish it were different, its not and never will be. By focusing on all the negative of the child's mother choices and actions, you will bring negativity to your child. Even though it may not be intentional. Focus on what you can control, the time that you have with your daughter to raise her to the best of your ability. You will have to put out fires from time to time. Just do it and move on. Enjoy your daughter, be the happiness that she needs.


Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
SamsDad
journeyman


Reged: 04/29/10
Posts: 79
Re: nothing can be done? [Re: annatof4]
      #755710 - 07/14/11 05:56 PM

"Also as a side note, please keep in mind that your child is 50% you and 50% the other parent." - I'm not the kind of father that wishes my child wasn't something she is. I would never want to change where she came from or who for that matter. I am very fair to her mother and LOVE the good and accept the bad that comes along with who she is and what she does and nothing will ever change that. I do NOT however need to accept the choices she makes while standing by and doing nothing. Preventing my child from that aggravation will never happen and because our child will ultimately ALWAYS be the one who pays the price for the decisions her mother makes, I will never stop fighting to help her through it or away from it.

Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
annatof4
member
**

Reged: 07/13/11
Posts: 125
Re: nothing can be done? [Re: SamsDad]
      #755744 - 07/15/11 07:41 AM

Nor am I saying that you stop fighting. I am still in that boat myself. I sometimes regret spending so much time on fighting the good fight. As it only means less time that I have spent on my children. All of the frustration and negativity can be felt by your children....that was my only point.

Post Extras: Print Post   Remind Me!   Notify Moderator  
Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | (show all)



Extra information
0 registered and 3 anonymous users are browsing this forum.

Moderator:  dsAdmin 

Print Topic

Forum Permissions
      You cannot start new topics
      You cannot reply to topics
      HTML is disabled
      UBBCode is disabled

Rating:
Topic views: 4097

Rate this topic

Jump to

Contact Us Divorce Source Home

*
UBB.threads™ 6.5.1.1


Resources & Tools
Start Your Divorce Online Start Your Divorce
Several Options to Get Started Today.
Divorce Tools Online Divorce Tools
Keeping it Simple to Get the Job Done.
Divorce Downloads Download Center
Instantly Download Books, Guides & Forms.
Divorce and Custody Books Discount Books
Over 100 of the Best Divorce & Custody Books.
Negotiate Online Negotiate Online
Settle your Divorce and Save.
Custody and Support Tracking Custody Scheduling
Make Sure You Document Everything.

Easily Connect With a Lawyer or Mediator
Have Divorce Professionals from Your Area Contact You!
Enter Your Zip Code: