Goodmom
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/17/07
Posts: 2015
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[quote] Because the doctor is going to prescribe the same thing. But I would not call CPS. Maybe I am setting myself up for a problem later. Something to think about. [/quote]
I distinctly recall stating that CPS probably wouldn't do anything about it.
I would have a problem with my ex giving either kid a prescription medicine without a doctor's prescription. But then, he works in the medical field and wouldn't do something that stupid.
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c_jane
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 04/06/07
Posts: 1755
Loc: In the Great State of Texas
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It is POSSIBLE that the kid's DR. KNEW the medicine would 'wear out' in the afternoons. Sometimes kids on behavior meds are 'encouraged' not to take them during weekends/summer/vacations to give their bodies a 'break' and so the lowest dose of the prescribed meds will continue to work as expected.
The MOM has a tight schedule for her son for the afternoons, so he's ABLE to adjust/cope with the meds wearing off. The DAD is taking the easy way out and over-medicating the boy so he DOESN'T have to deal with the son and his behavior.
Dad needs to talk with the Mom and see how SHE deals with it. Dad needs some parenting skills and PATIENCE. I agree with another poster -- instead of DAD giving the SON his Ritalin, he needs to take it HIMSELF!!
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John Constantine: God's a kid with an ant farm.... He's not planning anything.
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ssmom79
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/27/07
Posts: 7784
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I am not stupid and I'd appreciate if you'd not refer to me or my mother that way, thanks. Not really necessary to be insulting or condescending. If that is how you prefer to deal with people, then I'll take note and not converse with you.
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Goodmom
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/17/07
Posts: 2015
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[quote]I am not stupid and I'd appreciate if you'd not refer to me or my mother that way, thanks. Not really necessary to be insulting or condescending. If that is how you prefer to deal with people, then I'll take note and not converse with you. [/quote]
Then I will rephrase:
It shows extremely poor judgement to give someone a medication that is controlled enought to require a prescription from a physician to a person other than who the prescription is made out to.
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ssmom79
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/27/07
Posts: 7784
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Thanks for attempting a fix. Most wouldn't care to do that. I still stand by the opinion that my mother didn't use poor judgement but you are certainly entitled to your opinion in that regard.
However, to the OP I think it was very poor to attempt to 'fix' the issue he had with his son while in his care. I hope the OP gets the desired outcome she seeks to avoid her ex attempting that kid of a fix.
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elliesmom
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/07/05
Posts: 8835
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I don't care how awful this child was with his father - and I certainly would understand his frustration if he had approached the SLC mom and she told him to F off - but it doesn't matter. What he did was reckless, illegal, and flat out horrible example for the child. No matter how frustrated you get over a behavior issue - this is not life/death - you don't do what he did. He has no idea how much to give a child, much less a child who is already on something else. And no fecking way did he discuss this with his therapist - no therapist/doctor who wants to keep his/her license would advise a patient on how to illegally medicate a child.
That said I don't know what you'd do. CPS probably won't do much if anything as he is the NCP. Hopefully being educated will be enough to get him to stop.
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Forgiveness is...letting go of the hope that the past can be changed.
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30210
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Keep in mind, I am NOT saying that what he did was the BEST thing, but as a person who has a child with ADHD, and is QUITE knowledgeable about the medications (the info is available online and from a number of sources), what he did was NOT "dangerous".
What many may not be understanding is that psychotropic medication is NOT an exact science. What he did, trying a medication to see the result, is EXACTLY what a doctor does. They choose a medication, give a small dose, watch the effects, increase the dose until the required results are obtained, and stick with that dosage. 5 mg is the MINIMUM does they give.
Now, not all ADHD meds work the same. Some are cumulative (like zoloft) where you do not see any effects until they med has been taken regularly. Others, like Ritalin or Adderall are instant on meds, meaning they have an effect after the first dose.
I know this because I have dealt with the condition. As for those that have said no doctor would do this or that, they are wrong. My daughter's therapist (VERY respected, runs numerous treatment centers including a SCHOOL), when we were playing with her meds, would tell me, "Start her out on this dosage, if it works, great, if not, give her a second pill." For a while, she was on Concerta, which is a 12 hour med, we had a prescription for Adderall, which was given at OUR discretion, if she was having a a bad night, had a late night, etc.
We are NOT talking about high blood pressure medicine, antibiotics, etc. Psychotropic medication works differently. Straterra is a PERFECT example. For some kids, it works WONDERS. Others kids? Absolutely NO effect whatsoever.
What I am saying is what Dad did, trying a medication to see the effect, is EXACTLY what therapists do.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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elliesmom
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/07/05
Posts: 8835
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I have dealt with these meds and SD and SS as well. And I know some you try, they ramp up, and then give up and move on. But no therapist of an adult is going to advise him on how to medicate his child with his meds, nevermind a child they have never seen. And our Dr, since SD was under 12, sent her for a CBC and and other blood test screens before scribing anything.
With that in mind - he did this without the advisement of a physician and just by the seat of his pants. Very bad judgement. I assume since he did not try to hide it - he did so out of ignorance and not reckless disregard for his kid - and hopefully he will stop now.
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Forgiveness is...letting go of the hope that the past can be changed.
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30210
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I guess that is what is bugging me the most. The way his actions are being viewed. Yeah, what he did, as I said, wasn't the best thing, it is being viewed as "selfish". Why is that? As a parent of a child with ADHD, I assure you, medication is not given so I have a more peaceful time, it is given to help the CHILD. And the DUAL view is even MORE frustrating. Mom medicates the kid so the kid can be successful. Dad medicates the kid and he is painted like he ONLY did it so the kid wouldn't be a pain in the butt to Dad. Mom brags how the "structure" in the kids life is what she uses to control him. Well, its REALLY hard to have "structure" with a child you only get one evening a week (not counting weekends).
Now, we have debated whether Mom KNEW about how the child was acting at Dad's. We know that Dad didn't TELL Mom there was a problem. My question THEN would be, why didn;t she ASK? She BRAGGED about how SHE has TOTAL say in ALL treatment issues. So why hasn't she ASKED Dad how the child was acting? When you take SOLE control of something, you also have SOLE responsibility. But HER time with the child is fine because of the treatment plan. She had a RESPONSIBILITY to SEEK out how things were going with Dad.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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Redlegg
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/05/06
Posts: 26696
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She had a RESPONSIBILITY to SEEK out how things were going with Dad.
maybe she googled it.....you know, checked his FB.....
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