cpnebraska
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Our court date was set for Wed. Today I get a letter saying he retained a lawyer on Sept 1. asking for a continuance for at least 90 days. He had from mid July to mid august to appeal it. This was started in Nov. filed in Feb. so add 3 more month we are looking at 10 months of it being dragged out. (7 months of trying to serve him papers)
He is asking for the right to claim them on his taxes. 2 kids. 1 each year until 2014 then alternating.
I am not against this 100% but I wonder, what reasons are there to deny it?
My ex sees my kids less than 24 hours a month. He has EOW, weeknight dinner and 2wks summer. He does not use it. I am very flexible with him seeing them whenever. One problem I have is he communicates through them and doesn't give the courtesy of asking me, the kids do. 99% of the time the answer is yes.
With him having less than 6 overnight visits a year, and believe me I'm being generous, his doing nothing but paying cs is there reason to deny him?
I use the tax return for things the kids need usually and if there is anything left a small vacation. Yes, I know this doesn't matter to the courts but it does matter to the kids.
Thanks,
*** I wanted to add that I'm looking at what he could be setting me up for. There is usually an alterior motive with him. I can't see this causing any problems if I agree to it but has anyone experienced problems?
And yes. I do have a lawyer that I will be contacting next week.
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Having one kid makes you a parent, two makes you a referee!
Edited by cpnebraska (09/10/11 01:56 PM)
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Cassie23
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Our CS order did not get completely finalized until a year later because of the continuances.
When H was the NCP we were told by our lawyer and then the judge (NY) that if the two parents cannot come to an agreement on it that the CP automatically gets the tax deduction since the parent with primary residence gets it unless it is agreed to otherwise. The judge stated that she cannot rule on that because it was out of her jurisdiction, we would have to take it to the Supreme Court.
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MrsB
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<<Our CS order did not get completely finalized until a year later because of the continuances.>>
Ours was the same. From the date of filing it took over a year. Ex pulled every trick in the book and got away with it. However the modification was also backdated to the date of filing. We'll see if I ever see all the arrears.
Cpn I hope things move speedy for you. I know how frustrating it can be.
About the taxes - do y'all have joint? With him having so little time I may agree to every 2 or 3 years and ONLY if he's current on CS.
Edited by MrsB (09/10/11 05:44 PM)
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Redlegg
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You are both going to be supporting the kids, based on a formula. The formula is supposed to determine the fair amounts for each, if you are both current on what you are supposed to do, why would you not agree to him getting a deduction for the child(ren) half the time. He is their father.
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Cassie23
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Yes ours was backdated to the DATE OF FILE- which was after she was actually served with the papers.
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Cassie23
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Red I completely agree. I didn't think it was fair at all that over a 18 year span H was never allowed to claim his daughter EVEN counting the years that BM made only $9k/YEAR total and H paid over that in CS.
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annieo
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ours was as long as cs was current (while the children resided with her) hubby got to claim one and she claimed the other and that is how the judge ruled then when the children resided with us she was never current on her whopping 75.00/m for two children. so we got to claim both.
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Cassie23
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I think judges should be able to rule on that. Why not? I don't know why in NY (where we resided) they were unable to :( If both parents are fully financially responsible for the children I think BOTH should get to claim the children EOY or split if there are two or more children.
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cpnebraska
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I will most likely agree too it. I can't see any reason not to. As long as he is current and stays current.
I have never tried to scrw him over and am not going to start now.
He does help support them as much as the state forces him too. He won't help with extras like sports, school activities etc. I've never pressured him to but it would be nice. For the last 7 years I have supported more than half. Only in the last 2 has he been paying CS and been current less than 1 year. Which is why I never considered it before. With this modification he will be paying closer to half what they cost. now it's $470 mo. That barely covers food (15 & 10) much less gas (for to & from school) clothes, supplies, housing, water, electricity etc. (If you split it)
He still owes me over $2000 for child care but I've givenup on ever seeing it. Not even sure if i have the receipts anymore.
They will back date it to March.
Now when I agree to this he needs to start giving me copies of EOB from kids appointments and info on his insurance. I have no idea what is covered and what isn't. He won't give me anything. IF insurance and taxes are covered under this order (everything states they are) then this can be ordered.
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Having one kid makes you a parent, two makes you a referee!
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gr8Dad
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"As long as he is current and stays current."
So will you be giving up the right to claim them if something financial happens to YOU, and you are unable to pay for the things YOU said you would?
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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Sherron
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"So will you be giving up the right to claim them if something financial happens to YOU, and you are unable to pay for the things YOU said you would?"
Being current on cs is a fairly common prerequisite in co's for the ncp to claim the child(ren) on taxes. Out of curiosity... what agreement to claiming the kids on taxes do you and your ex have? Do you split, take turns, what?
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cpnebraska
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If they lived with him and I wasn't able to support them. yes.
Now, If he was laid off or was hurt I wouldn't hold it against him. If he did what has already happened and quit to avoid paying then he doesn't need it.
Also, say he was working less and saw the kids more and fell behind. I would sign the 8832.
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Having one kid makes you a parent, two makes you a referee!
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gr8Dad
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I get them every year. She is only ordered to pay $200 a month. Not even CLOSE to PARTIALLY supporting her half of the costs.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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gr8Dad
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As long as you are willing to consider uncontrolled financial happenings, thats cool.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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MrsB
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She raises the kids and has them every day. Unless they have malnutrition and are homeless - pretty sure she's doing her part.
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gr8Dad
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Of course she does, good on her. But IF something were to happen to her financial pipeline, ie, loss of job etc, there is NO organization stating what she HAS to spend on the child. She is able to reduce the amount, voluntarily, that she spends, ie, cheaper food/clothes, less entertainment, etc. The NCP (and ANY NCP for that matter) does not have the SAME rights. I was only asking if she would consider the circumstances before deciding.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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MrsB
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I guess that's one of the positives of being the CP and actually raising your child instead of seeing them whenever you feel like it. General you, of course.
What do you wanna bet if she fell on hard times and needed to work a second job her X wouldn't be picking up the slack and taking the kids every day or at least more?
There are, as always, positives and negatives to being both. Seeing as how this NCP doesn't even take the visitation he has I don't feel sorry for him if she has the "luxury" of cutting expenses in certain areas. And really - NCP's have that option too. Speaking generally of course.
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Sherron
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"there is NO organization stating what she HAS to spend on the child. "
And the agency who does decide, calculated that $200 was your ex's fair share. I'm guessing you'd be happy if all your kids ever cost you a month was $200? There are different advantages for cps and ncps... a cp never has a set limit for how much money is spent a month, something comes up, it has to get paid, even if it's a concert a kid has to attend last minute, you make it work.
Everyone has areas they can and can't cut when things are tight... for ncp's, cs can only be cut if approved... how much would you like your ex to cut that $200 she doesn't even pay if she could cut it based on her decision alone??
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gr8Dad
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"I guess that's one of the positives of being the CP and actually raising your child instead of seeing them whenever you feel like it."
Typical "Never been an NCP" syndrome.
"There are, as always, positives and negatives to being both."
Yeah, LOTS of positives to being an NCP, that why so many fight to be one.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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cpnebraska
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I was just looking over the papers from Exs lawyer.
I thought this was interesting, especially considering the conversations.
It states - deductions for Federal and State taxes each year he is current in his child support obligation.
So basically, HIS lawyer is putting that clause in.
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Having one kid makes you a parent, two makes you a referee!
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Redlegg
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Fair is fair, but just reading that, I would make sure that the children are named, and for which years....
deductions for Federal and State taxes each year he is current in his child support obligation.
each year sounds like each year.......
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cpnebraska
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;) I didn't want to type the whole thing but I see how it sounds. Here is the entire paragraph:
"That if XX is to be resposible for the full child support obligation he seeks the right to have one of the two children as a dependant tax deduction for State and Federal taxes each year he is current in his CS obligation. When there is but one child available for the dependant deduction, that the parties alternate taking the deduction. "
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Having one kid makes you a parent, two makes you a referee!
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Redlegg
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As long as you are good with it, it is fair, and there is no "wiggle" room later on, then go with it.
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DedicatedDad
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He's not asking for the deductions then. He is proposing to split them.
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cpnebraska
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[quote]He's not asking for the deductions then. He is proposing to split them. [/quote]
That is pretty much what I said in my original post.
In the past he hasn't gotten to claim either of them for the reasons I have already listed. We had a verbal agreement that if he was current and pulling his weight with the kids (visitation) he could claim them. He never was current with CS much less anything else.
I prefer to have things done through court now. I just want to make sure I have myself protected since I am the one raising these kids 99% of the time.
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Having one kid makes you a parent, two makes you a referee!
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