onmyown_36
member
Reged: 08/04/10
Posts: 134
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So I have been divorced now almost 6 months. In the order ex was awarded several items, most of which he has gotten. He left a few bigger things to come back later and get. Well he still hasn't gotten them. So I emailed my atty and asked her and she said it would be ok at this point to give him an ultimatum. 30 more days or you forfiet what you were awarded. So I sent him a certified letter last month and gave him 30 days and I haven't heard a peep. It has been over 30 days now. It going on almost 6 months since the divorce. He has moved , bought a, house and remarried. I saw him last weekend when we exchanged our daughter for visitation and he said nothing. So do I just do what I want with these things? A few are personal items some are just pricier items he got in the agreement. I get mad sometimes and think no... he has time, resources to get these things I'm done. But then I think - have I done enough... will a judge come back in 3 months and say go buy him new stuff....
I'm debating calling him and giving him one more oppportunity..but when is enough enough? WWYD?
BTW he is out of state so I can't take it to him or ask him to run buy and get it...it is a weekend trip for him to get this stuff.
I also sent him info about back taxes in his name- on my tax ticket for personal property- haven't heard anything about that either.... Not sure how I deal with that one. Its his property but was listed and taxxed at my current address.
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Renny
addict
Reged: 09/24/11
Posts: 479
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If I my ask, what do you mean by "bigger" items? Can these be stored in the garage or storage room? With kids involved I would be cautious about making this into a fight. As a last resort, after several months and a couple of certified letters, I would consider putting his belongings in a storage facility for safekeeping if you need the space. Warn him you are going to do it and let him know the monthly charges.
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onmyown_36
member
Reged: 08/04/10
Posts: 134
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large tools-bookcases etc. I only have a one car garage and they have been in there for the last 6 months. I don't think i can do a storage unit unless he agrees and pays for it. (iI can't do it and tell him to pay the bill is what I mean) And since he won't even respond to my communications Ihave trouble getting any info to or from him.
Quite frankly, he has moved on with his life... its time to move on with mine including not having to step over his stuff anymore.
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Renny
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Reged: 09/24/11
Posts: 479
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If the agreement is silent on the time frame -- look at it carefully for timeframes for other things, like changing the names on utilities and the like -- I would say six months is a reasonable amount of time. But you can't just throw it away. Tell him you are going to give the bookcases and similar items to goodwill in 30 days if you don't hear from him and keep the tools somewhere safe. Thing is, as much as it's annoying to have his "presence" in those items, it is not worth doing nothing rash. You will pay dearly down the line in some other way, especially with kids.
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onmyown_36
member
Reged: 08/04/10
Posts: 134
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Time frames for everything else have long since passed. The items in the first order had 60 days. there was no time frame on the final items. My plan is to put the things away or use them for a while longer with the assumption he has abandoned them. i am planning on holding on to them to insure he doesn't try to take me back to court to obtain them..
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Renny
addict
Reged: 09/24/11
Posts: 479
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Sounds like a good plan -- using what you can. As you know, the issue really is whether the items can be deemed abandoned under the circumstances.
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finz
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/17/08
Posts: 6489
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Did you say anything about it when you just saw him ?
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onmyown_36
member
Reged: 08/04/10
Posts: 134
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No, he will not speak to me since his marriage. He let daughter out of the car and left. I have requested in the past on 5 occasions for him to make the arrangements. Sometimes he ignores the request. Once he made arrangements and then canceled them. My last request was by certified mail 5 weeks ago.
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Debi
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 7139
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Send another certified letter and a matching copy to the courthouse with your case number on it. List how long the items have been there waiting for him to take possession, list each item, give him a timeframe in the letter and outline exactly what you plan to do with the items if the date passes. If the time frame passes and he has not responded send another letter letting him know that as of XXXX date the property will be gone. Send a copy of that to the courthouse with your case number on it also.
Better yet have your attorney draft the letters. You should not have to hold the items forever and if you've done due dilegence that's all anyone can ask of you. I would NOT put the items in storage because you're right he would not be obligated to pay.
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When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.
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javajunkiee
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 3158
Loc: SC
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Before you pull the trigger on any of this, make sure there is nothing in his name at your house that you don't want to lose. Like Renny said, utilities and things. If he's disagreeable enough to not retrieve his belongings and isn't willing to discuss it, he may be disagreeable enough to get the plug pulled on the lights, heat, etc.
...and if he doesn't do that, the new wife might. Always c.y.a. in situations like this.
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Marriage doesn't come with a money-back guarantee.
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