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hurryupwait
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Partial Child support payments
      #768567 - 11/21/11 11:03 AM

I have mentioned my situation before, but not sure how to indicate "late" child support payments...

Aug - paid 2/3 amount due
Sept - Paid 2/3 amount due
Oct - Paid 1/3 amount due
Nov - Paid 2/3 amount due

Is he 4 months late since each of those months were not paid the full amount? Or his he not even 2 months late because the amount just add together?

Does this distinction matter when going to court for contempt of payment?

Hope that makes sense!

Thanks!


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DedicatedDad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768568 - 11/21/11 11:12 AM

The distinction won't matter in court.

The court probably will only tell him to catch up, set up a CS readjustment hearing (or give paperwork to both of you to fill out) if your incomes or time with the child(ren) has changed, and perhaps set up automatic payments from his paycheck.


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Avaya
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768577 - 11/21/11 11:50 AM

I think a court would say he's not late at all. I'd be surprised if you can get a court date with only 4 months of partial payments since payments ARE being made.

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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768595 - 11/21/11 01:14 PM

Have you reported to the court that the child care expenses are no longer needed?

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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768631 - 11/21/11 02:33 PM

Avaya - maybe "late" isn't the right term? But he is not following his court ordered amount, is there another way I should be referring to it, or a different way I should be going about this?

No gr8Dad I have not reported to the court that child care expenses are no longer needed, as that is not the case.

I have not done anything in court yet...still trying to work with him actually, but he is no longer discussing it with me, and instead is discussing things with our 10 year old and making him uncomfortable, so I am thinking I will need to address this in court if he isn't willing to communicate a plan with me and of course he can't be bothered with taking it to court for a review.

Rest assured, I want nothing more than what is due our child. If we do go to court, I will be totally honest about all costs/expenses involved. If a lower amount is ordered then it is right...he just does not get to make that decision himself.

thanks!


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768633 - 11/21/11 02:35 PM

"No gr8Dad I have not reported to the court that child care expenses are no longer needed, as that is not the case."

Then why did you say in earlier posts that child care expenses were no longer needed?

Edited to add: You wrote, "My question is - our son no longer goes to traditional childcare as he is 10 years old" As the parent USING the child care, it IS your responsibility to report when it is no longer being used.

Edited by gr8Dad (11/21/11 02:37 PM)


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768648 - 11/21/11 03:30 PM

[quote]"No gr8Dad I have not reported to the court that child care expenses are no longer needed, as that is not the case."

Then why did you say in earlier posts that child care expenses were no longer needed?

Edited to add: You wrote, "My question is - our son no longer goes to traditional childcare as he is 10 years old" As the parent USING the child care, it IS your responsibility to report when it is no longer being used. [/quote]

I did not say daycare is no longer needed, I said he no longer goes to a traditional daycare center, like the one my 5 year old goes to. Rather afterschool camps...

Are reviews required, I had never heard that...


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Cassie23
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768653 - 11/21/11 03:36 PM

Seems to me he would be behind 2/3 by the END of THIS month, if he pays NO more this month. He isn't even a full month behind and we aren't even at the very end of the month.

Courts go by the amount he is behind at the present date, not that he is only making partial payments. Not even a month behind, I don't see a court entertaining a contempt of CS payment at this juncture.


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768654 - 11/21/11 03:43 PM

So lets stop beating around the bush. When he was ONE YEAR OLD, he atteneded a certain kind of child care. He is now TEN YEARS OLD, so he goes to school and he then goes WHERE?

And when he GOES to that after school place, what is the COST, in comparison to the cost when he was spending the entire DAY at a daycare?

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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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Goodmom
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768670 - 11/21/11 05:18 PM

[quote]And when he GOES to that after school place, what is the COST, in comparison to the cost when he was spending the entire DAY at a daycare? [/quote]

That is irrelevant. What IS relevant is what the court order says. And he's not paying the full amount of court ordered support. He's in contempt.

If I were OP, I would be sending certified letters reiterating what the court order states about child support. And if that fails to get the full amount paid, then I would be filing contempt charges and requesting wage garnishment.

If the father isn't happy with the amount of the child support, then the father needs to go through the proper channels to get it adjusted.


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Goodmom]
      #768671 - 11/21/11 05:24 PM

UNLESS a portion of the child support is EARMARKED for child care, in which case he is perfectly justified in removing that portion if the child care is no longer needed.

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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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Goodmom
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768680 - 11/21/11 05:57 PM

[quote]UNLESS a portion of the child support is EARMARKED for child care, in which case he is perfectly justified in removing that portion if the child care is no longer needed. [/quote]

Not WITHOUT going to court first. Where he would have to prove the amount of the decrease (which is easily obtainable by contacting the childcare places).

A portion of my child support is for my ex's portion of childcare costs (which have gone down, but not by much given that the costs for aftercare keep going up). He can't just decide, "Oh, childcare costs went down, I will just reduce what I am paying accordingly". He would FIRST have to file for a modification of child support.

Even if it were to go away completely, he would still have to FILE first.


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Goodmom]
      #768684 - 11/21/11 06:20 PM

I love it, you are DEFENDING a woman defrauding the guy out of money, because HE should be the one to file. How PATHETIC is that?

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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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DedicatedDad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768688 - 11/21/11 06:37 PM

I suspect if his income had increased, he would be accused of not reporting income and cheating his kids, not that other other parent needs to file.

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Goodmom
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768709 - 11/21/11 08:30 PM

[quote]I love it, you are DEFENDING a woman defrauding the guy out of money, because HE should be the one to file. How PATHETIC is that? [/quote]

First of all, she isn't defrauding him. Unless the court order states she is to file for a modification should a change in childcare occur, she is under no obligation whatsoever to do so.

BTW, when the childcare changed there was NOTHING stopping him from filing for a modification.

But I strongly suspect that he did not do so because HIS income went UP. Well, if that is the case, then using your logic, he is defrauding the child out of additional child support that is owed due to his increased income.

To be blunt, there isn't any type of fraud in either scenario. She is under no obligation to file for a modification. And he can file for a modification at any time based on either a change of circumstances or enough time passing.

What he can't do is pay less than what the court order states. Like he is. And it's going to bite him in the a$$. And it will be completely his fault.


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Goodmom
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: DedicatedDad]
      #768710 - 11/21/11 08:33 PM

[quote]I suspect if his income had increased, he would be accused of not reporting income and cheating his kids, not that other other parent needs to file. [/quote]

If were to use gr8's logic, you would be correct.

But using plain, common sense logic, if neither parent files for a modification, then child support rightfully remains what is in the court order.


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Goodmom]
      #768711 - 11/21/11 08:38 PM

"But I strongly suspect that he did not do so because HIS income went UP. Well, if that is the case, then using your logic, he is defrauding the child out of additional child support that is owed due to his increased income."

LOL, you are really a piece of garbage. She has ADMITTED that he is still paying for child care expenses that she no longer has, so to make it "even" in your deluded head, you have MADE UP a story about his income going up. Your attempt to defend a woman at ALL costs is not only transparent, it speaks VOLUMES about your character.

"And he can file for a modification at any time based on either a change of circumstances or enough time passing."

So HE can file for a modification "any time"...well, unless not enough time has passed, or if there is a change in circumstances, which he wouldn't KNOW about unless she told him.

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Goodmom]
      #768712 - 11/21/11 08:40 PM

Of course, IF the order states something along the lines of "Child support shall be X amount of dollars, with Y amount of dollars for child care, for a total of Z"

In THAT case, he CAN stop paying the child care expenses when the child care stops. But PLEASE defend the Mommy again, its really entertaining.

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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Goodmom
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768713 - 11/21/11 08:50 PM

You said:

LOL, you are really a piece of garbage.

My response:

I see that you are just as abusive as ever.

You said:

She has ADMITTED that he is still paying for child care expenses that she no longer has, so to make it "even" in your deluded head, you have MADE UP a story about his income going up.

My response:

You are clearly delusional if you think my SPECULATING (you may want to look up what that word means) that one of the reasons that he hasn't bothered to go through the proper channels to change the amount of child support is that his income went up and he didn't want to report that.

My character is just fine. Yours is the one in question. But that is not surprising.

BTW, she didn't say that all of the childcare costs have gone.

And that still doesn't CHANGE THE FACT that the father is not paying what is court ordered and is NOT going through the PROPER channels to get support reduced to reflect the change in childcare costs (which haven't gone completely away). And one of the reasons for that COULD be that his income has gone up.

You said:


Your attempt to defend a woman at ALL costs is not only transparent, it speaks VOLUMES about your character.

My response:

And your attempts to defend a father NOT FOLLOWING THE COURT ORDER is transparent. And speaks volumes about your character. Along with all of your other posts attacking women and verbally abusing them. The father is COMPLETELY wrong in this case. He's not following the court order. You are obviously going to continue DEFENDING HIS NOT FOLLOWING A COURT ORDER because, well, it would mean siding with the mother. Funny thing is, if the mother was here not following the court order, you would be all over her.

You said:

So HE can file for a modification "any time"...well, unless not enough time has passed, or if there is a change in circumstances, which he wouldn't KNOW about unless she told him.

My response:

So he isn't aware of the childcare costs having gone down? Well, that's just means that you were COMPLETELY WRONG (as usual) and the father is just NOT FOLLOWING THE COURT ORDER. Which means the father is in CONTEMPT OF A COURT ORDER.


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Goodmom
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768714 - 11/21/11 08:56 PM

[quote]Of course, IF the order states something along the lines of "Child support shall be X amount of dollars, with Y amount of dollars for child care, for a total of Z"

In THAT case, he CAN stop paying the child care expenses when the child care stops. But PLEASE defend the Mommy again, its really entertaining. [/quote]

The child support calculations in my court order contains a line for childcare costs. As I stated, they have gone down a little since the initial court order. They will go away completely in a few years.

Even if they do go away, a MODIFICATION MUST BE FILED to change ANY amount of child support.

The father, in this case, is in for a rude awakening when he has to pay what he was court ordered to pay. If he thinks the childcare amount has gone down, he NEEDS TO FILE FOR A MODIFICATION. Because ANY childcare that isn't worded like this: "Each party shall pay directly to the childcare provider their share of childcare costs." Needs to file for a support modification. Any add on of childcare costs to child support turns it into a CHILD SUPPORT order. And to change it, one needs to FILE FOR A MODIFICATION.

Now, why isn't the father doing that?


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Goodmom]
      #768719 - 11/21/11 09:31 PM

And it is people like YOU, who ADVOCATE someone in a divorce getting SCREWED OVER because they felt the other party would be HONEST, that CAUSE the back up in the family courts.

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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...

Edited by gr8Dad (11/21/11 09:32 PM)


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Goodmom]
      #768720 - 11/21/11 09:35 PM

"I see that you are just as abusive as ever."

And I see that you STILL do not know what ABUSE is...

"You are clearly delusional if you think my SPECULATING (you may want to look up what that word means) that one of the reasons that he hasn't bothered to go through the proper channels to change the amount of child support is that his income went up and he didn't want to report that."

You might want to look up the word SYNTAX.

"BTW, she didn't say that all of the childcare costs have gone."

Yes, she DID. CAMP is not CHILD CARE.

"So he isn't aware of the childcare costs having gone down? Well, that's just means that you were COMPLETELY WRONG (as usual) and the father is just NOT FOLLOWING THE COURT ORDER. Which means the father is in CONTEMPT OF A COURT ORDER."

He wouldn't know unless she TOLD him. Oh, and per YOU, he then has to ask the PERMISSION of the COURT to STOP it. And you seem to have NO problem with that.

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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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Goodmom
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768731 - 11/22/11 05:54 AM

[quote]And it is people like YOU, who ADVOCATE someone in a divorce getting SCREWED OVER because they felt the other party would be HONEST, that CAUSE the back up in the family courts. [/quote]

BAER.


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Goodmom
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768735 - 11/22/11 06:08 AM

You said:

And I see that you STILL do not know what ABUSE is...

My response:

I know exactly what abuse is. And it is crystal clear in all of your attacking posts that you are an abusive person. All anybody has to do is read all of your posts and it will become crystal clear to them, too.

You said:

You might want to look up the word SYNTAX.


My response:

BAER

You said:

Yes, she DID. CAMP is not CHILD CARE.

My response:

And yet, I am able to claim the CAMP that I send my kids to for their summer CHILD CARE as child care expenses on my taxes. I think I will go with the IRS definition over your biased one. Which, btw, is what a family court would go with, as well.

Camp is MOST DEFINITELY childcare when it is used so that a parent CAN GO TO WORK.

You said:

He wouldn't know unless she TOLD him.

My response:

Which now leaves the question of why he isn't paying the full amount of the court order. The answer is simple, he's not following the court order.

You said:

Oh, and per YOU, he then has to ask the PERMISSION of the COURT to STOP it.

My response:

No, per state guidelines. If one wants to change the amount, one has to file for a modification.

BTW, I still remember when you weren't all this worked up when CJane's ex did not inform her of the decrease in insurance premuims resulting in her overpaying that portion of the support. Oh, wait, he's a dad and she's a mom, so that makes it okay.

You said:

And you seem to have NO problem with that.

My response:

I have no problem with the court order being followed. Which the father is NOT doing. Clearly, you don't have a problem with that.


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Debi
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Goodmom]
      #768736 - 11/22/11 06:12 AM

"What he can't do is pay less than what the court order states. Like he is. And it's going to bite him in the a$$. And it will be completely his fault."

Not in my state. If he is making any payment at all they aren't going to go after him at unless the court systems become less backed up (bwaaa haa haa). The people at CSE will tell a person "There is nothing we an do unless NO payment is made for one calendar month". They won't even send a letter until that point. And if the person calling is not receiving any state assistance they probably won't even do that.

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Avaya
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Goodmom]
      #768740 - 11/22/11 07:05 AM

[quote]
Even if it were to go away completely, he would still have to FILE first. [/quote]

Not if the order already allows for that. Like gr8dad said, if the order SAYS this portion is EARMARKED for child care, then he can remove it without court once the earmark is not applicable.

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DedicatedDad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Avaya]
      #768743 - 11/22/11 07:21 AM

I think that depends on the state. In mine, you have to go to court.

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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: DedicatedDad]
      #768758 - 11/22/11 10:04 AM

Wow I did not expect such heated responses! I will try to address what I can.

Gr8Dad you need to keep in mind that all women receiving child support are NOT out to screw their ex over. My ex didn't want to go to court almost 10 years ago because he didn't want to drive that far or miss work; We used the VA child support calculator to come up with his montly amount - almost 10 years ago. At that time I CHOSE not to include the massive amounts of OT he was earning, because to me that was his extra money and I didn't want him to be "held" to earning that amount.

Our support is calculated by including child care expenses in the equation but no where does it state that a portion of what he pays is earmarked for child care, nor does it state that a review must be done if that amount changes or for any other reason.

The amount he has paid for almost 10 years has been sufficient to cover the needs of our son and in order to keep the peace with him, I have never taken him in for a review,even when I knew his salary close to doubled, thankfully so, as he now tells me has hase taken a cut.

As I have stated, I am all for a review, based on what I know, I do not believe the amount will be lowered and I do not feel a review is needed, so I will not be the one requesting it. He needs to, but he won't as he doesn't want to take time away from work or anything else, but expects me to do it. If I am going to do it, then it will be to address the amount he has not paid.

It is my understanding that he has a court ordered amount to pay and he is not doing that, so he is in the wrong. I have been working with him for 4 months to give him time to figure out what he plans to do, either request a review, or pay what he is ordered to

Ex is VERY aware of the daycare changes for our child, as he picks him up EOW from said daycare/aftercare or our home. I have always informed him of the change of venue at least a month in advance and dicussed the cost. He has had a year to do something about this last change.

He does not legally have the right to decide what he will and will not pay.

Again, I am not a money grubbing. ex screwing Mother, so you are barking up the wrong tree with me.

There are also additional costs that have come into play since our divorce, when our child was a year old, till now that he is almost 11. Costs again that I have discussed with his Dad, even tho as the person with Sole Legal and Physical custody I do not have to have his permission for, as our agreement states - "Mom will dicuss medical, educational and well-being decisions with Dad, with final decision making made by Mom." He has always agreed to the dicussions we have.

Lastly, it has been close to 10 years and we have never had a major problem like this, and I am gathering information on the best way to handle it. He is acting very out of character to me and our son; I try communicating with him, but he cut that off close to 3 weeks ago.

Thank you to those who have provided your insights and factual information.


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768765 - 11/22/11 11:13 AM

Yes, and I asked quite plainly what the different between the child care and the after school care was, and you have dodged the question EVERY time. That alone indicates you KNOW IT'S LOWER. The added expenses you listed, summer camp, etc, are NOT mandatory things.

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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768769 - 11/22/11 12:04 PM

I have not dodged your question. I have purposely not answered it, as in this case it has no bearing on the question I asked. In Virginia, one MUST go through the court to request a review to decrease or increase one's child support payment.

So to prove I am not hiding anything, here is your answer! It is lower than when he was 1 year old; it is NOT lower than it has been for the last 5 years, when began full day public school (kindergarten is 1/2 day in my County).

Summer camp IS mandatory so that he can receive care while I am in work all day - as you have been told by others.

I am NOT concerned with the amount being lowered, it could be, since daycare is less than when we made our original agreement 10 years ago, it could be higher too, as we are both earning more. Also ortho care when deemed medically necessary is also to be factored in to child support, which our son's is; and I haven't asked him to contribute to.

My POINT is that he is not paying his COURT ORDERED amount, nor is he doing anything to alter his obligation legally. Therefore I am trying to determine the best when and how to address the situation. I am not fighting a review, nor will I oppose a change either way; If he cannot pay his obligation the courts clearly state it is his responsibility to bring it to court.


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ssmom79
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768772 - 11/22/11 12:19 PM

Purposely not answering a question is pretty much dodging a question.

I am no stranger to the whole daycare included with child support, currently have an order over ten years old, neither party willing to go to court for fear of the other party. So we still pay an amount equal to SD in full time daycare and SS in after school daycare. They are 14 and 17.

Bottom line, if we want to change it, we go to court. We don't arbitrarily decide to underpay a court ordered amount because we feel slighted by the amount.


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ssmom79
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: ssmom79]
      #768773 - 11/22/11 12:21 PM

I would go with goodmom's original plan of action.

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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768775 - 11/22/11 12:25 PM

Gr8tDad - I just wanted to break this down for you, in case it would help.

Child Support is Court Ordered
In VA, one must return to court to request a review in order for that amount to be changed.
Our agreement does not state that we ever HAVE to have a review; VA states one is allowed every 3 years or based on a change of a at least a certain %.
If neither of us ever requests a review, and we are fine paying the original amount, then neither of us are defauding each other.

In this situation, HE is the one not paying his ordered amount and wants a change, but wants me to do it for him. I am not inclined to do things for him any longer as we are not togther.

If he wants a review he is well within in his right to request one and I will willingly and honestly participate, until that time, he is court ordered to pay X amount, and is in contempt of court by not doing so.

I really do not understand what your problem is. Again in Virginia, we could go from the date of our agreement till the age of 18 without ever changing the amount - no where does it indicate that either of us must drag each other to court over every pay increase, daycare or medical cost.

People going to court for every little change causes unnecessary backlogs.

We have done fairly well with our agreement for close to 10 years, bet a lot of people can't say that!


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DedicatedDad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768779 - 11/22/11 12:55 PM

Daycare is a sore spot for many of us. I paid daycare until the oldest was 13, and not one nickel was used after she was 8. I tried to get it changed, but my ex was lower income and getting state paid daycare (which means her part is paid for, the NCP's isn't). In those 5 years, just under $10K was overpaid and there wasn't anything I could do about it, as the state said the payments remain as long she qualified for it, whether she used it or not.

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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: DedicatedDad]
      #768783 - 11/22/11 01:02 PM

Wow DedicatedDad, that does not seem right at all! I am sorry for those of you who have problems like that, I do know that there are many with much bigger issues than I am currently having.

I really only want things to be done correctly and in the best interest of our child. I have always thought his Dad wanted the same too, but things seem to have changed and the last 5 months or so...

Anyway, I am sorry for those of you whose X's make things harder than they should or chose greed over their children; I know I am just a name on the internet, but that is not how I live my life.


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768788 - 11/22/11 01:30 PM

What you do not seem to understand is that in MANY cases, the NCP has to PAY for a child support review, hiring a lawyer, etc. On the other hand, the CP can request a review from CSE and the office will take care of it at no cost.

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768791 - 11/22/11 01:39 PM

"I really only want things to be done correctly and in the best interest of our child. I have always thought his Dad wanted the same too, but things seem to have changed and the last 5 months or so..."

So because the guy has some money troubles (which you stated he TOLD you he was having), all of a sudden he doesn't care about the kids?

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768792 - 11/22/11 01:52 PM

gr8Dad - I have to work on my wording with you, as I am not used to people using my words the way you do.

I do TOTALLY understand about paying for a Review, because in our situation which ever one of us requests it, must pay for it, as our case does not go through CSE, it was done as part of our divorce decree, in order for it to go through CSE one of us would have to go to court to request the case be re-opened and then again to request a transfer to CSE; So again - if he wants it reviewed, HE can do the legwork and pay for the court costs - we both will have to pay our own attorney.

Oh and I like how you just NOW brought this up...seems as though your other arguments don't work, so you must look for a new one...

Yes he stated he was having some money troubles due to his mom not paying bills at home, and he actually had to help her. He said he would be back to making full payments in Oct and would work on the arrears. Oct he paid EVEN LESS and will no longer speak to me; He is also making our son VERY uncomfortable about the things he is saying about me, and things he is telling our son that he plans to do.

So I know you don't have the whole story on that...I have mentioned that I am worried about him and he is acting out of character; he also has never missed more than 1 payment in 10 years. Something is not right...and that is why I am trying to get info, I will not do anything at all in court if I feel it will have a negative impact on our son...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768794 - 11/22/11 02:02 PM

Sorry that should have read 1 payment each year in 10 years. He generally skips December as he misses work for hunting and then has a nice Christmas for our son. It isn't ok but I deal with one payment, it isn't worth fighting over.

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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768796 - 11/22/11 02:05 PM

"I do TOTALLY understand about paying for a Review, because in our situation which ever one of us requests it, must pay for it"

Since it is NOT through CSE, then you can go sign up for CSE for FREE as the CP. He CANNOT go and request that CSE handle it, because he is the NCP. Yes, he could hire a lawyer and have a new agreement go through CSE, but YOU can do this for FREE.

"Oh and I like how you just NOW brought this up...seems as though your other arguments don't work, so you must look for a new one..."

I was saying YOU Needed to do it FROM THE BEGINNING.

"I have mentioned that I am worried about him and he is acting out of character; he also has never missed more than 1 payment in 10 years. Something is not right...and that is why I am trying to get info, I will not do anything at all in court if I feel it will have a negative impact on our son..."

So, the FACT that you were asking how to have it LEGALLY enforced means you were NOT looking to have it legally enforced? Yeah, right...BAER

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768801 - 11/22/11 02:24 PM

Well you obviously have no clue how Virginia works. Our divorce and child support/custody were done in circuit court. As it was close to 10 years ago, the case is now closed. CSE will not take the case from either of us until it is moved from circuit court to Dept of Child and Family Services. In order to do that, one would have to hire a lawyer to request the case re-opened, appear in court for Motions, to have a court date assigned, then again for the court date to request the move to Family Court and then potentially again to move to CSE; then proceed with meetings with CSE. If he wants a review HE needs to do this. Plain and simple this is not my responsibility.

I have no idea what you are meaning by the "Legally" statements you made. I of course am looking for information on how to proceed legally, looking for info to ensure I am using the proper terms when I am trying to explain that he is late/behind/short-paying whatever.

He is acting unstable and if I feel this will put my son in harm's way then I will have to think long and hard if I let him continue to pay what he wants so as to avoid problems with him for my son.

What does BAER mean?

I am not sure what kind of battles you have had with your X, but I am not her for sure and I am not sure why you are being so argumentative with me...I can take it, but it doesn't seem productive.

I simply asked - which you have NOT answered; my X is making partial payments for the last 4 months, is he considered 4 months late? Is he not late at all, even though they weren't full amounts? Do these distinctions matter if I take him to court?

So you know, if I do have to take him to court for the payments he missed, I will request a review so that if he is supposed to pay less then he can legally; but right now he has 2 LEGAL choices, pay the amount owed each month or request a review. Period.


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Cassie23
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768805 - 11/22/11 02:32 PM

I simply asked - which you have NOT answered; my X is making partial payments for the last 4 months, is he considered 4 months late? Is he not late at all, even though they weren't full amounts? Do these distinctions matter if I take him to court?
-----------------------------------------

He is not four months late, the payments pile up and he would be considered 2/3 late by the end of this month, if he pays nothing else for this month. The courts would want to know how much $$$ he is behind. That would be the amount which would make him not even a full month behind.

So you don't have a local Child Support Enforcement Agency you can actually file out the paperwork and ask for a garnishment? In my state you fill out the application, show them proof of the court order and with maybe a few other things they set it up. They deduct $25/year for the services.


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: Cassie23]
      #768808 - 11/22/11 02:38 PM

Hi Cassie thanks for your response...he is currently 1/3 less than 2 full months worth of payments behind.

In speaking to CSE on the phone, I was advised they could not provide their services from a circuit court order, that it needs to be moved to the Family court. Also they would not be able to address the amounts he is behind...only collection going forward - have you heard otherwise? Should I call again? Can they garnish wages if our courst order says he will make the payments directly to me?

thanks!


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768811 - 11/22/11 02:44 PM

"Well you obviously have no clue how Virginia works."

Umm, I beg to differ, you might want to read THIS:

dss.virginia.gov/files/division/dcse/intro_page/parents_guardians/guidance_procedures/Child_Support_2011booklet.pdf

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768815 - 11/22/11 02:53 PM

I have read that and did so again. Is there anything specific you would like me to take note of?

Or did you note that the NCP CAN file through DSCE?

thanks!


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768816 - 11/22/11 02:56 PM

Yeah, I was referencing THIS:

"Must a court establish the order?

No. It is not always necessary to go to court to establish a child support
order. Virginia law allows many child support orders to be established
administratively, which means that DCSE can establish an order for you.
Whenever possible, DCSE tries to establish child support orders administratively
instead of taking the case to court because this can be done
more quickly.
Occasionally, the order must be established in court due to extenuating
circumstances that a judge can consider when establishing the order.
These are known as deviating factors. (An example of a deviation factor is
when children have independent financial resources.) If an order is established
administratively and extenuating circumstances exist, either parent
may appeal the administrative order. All administrative support orders provide
information about the appeal process. Keep in mind that all appeals
must be made within 10 days of the date the order is received.

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768817 - 11/22/11 02:59 PM

Again - I already have a court order and was advised that they are unable to enforce the order we have until it is moved into the Family system; likewise they do not was to go through the admin to create an order when a legal one is already in place!

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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768818 - 11/22/11 03:00 PM

Oh, and BTW, it says an NCP can request a REVIEW, but a REVIEW can only be done once YOU file the request for services.

But the bottom line is that you KNOW that the child care expenses will go away, and you KNOW that the things such as camp, etc will NOT be included, so you WON'T get it through them.

We have ALL been there and done that. What I find MOST intersting is your supporters who are saying that HIS unwillingness to file through CSE is an indiocation that child support will go UP, but SOMEHOW, YOUR unwillingness to file doesn't mean it will go down.

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768819 - 11/22/11 03:01 PM

SO you filled out the application and they rejected it?

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768820 - 11/22/11 03:05 PM

Bottom line, end of story, if you WANT it enforced, you will need to file through CSE. Or just keep accepting what he pays, and DON'T file through CSE, but as it stands right now, he will get away with NOT paying the supposed full amount, because YOU won't file for enforcement. And honestly, YOU are the one that wants services, so YOU will have to be the one who files.

And as a parent who's ex hasn't paid support in full in ten years, I would be THRILLED if my ex was only 2/3's of a month behind.

What you are expecting is the BURGULAR to call 911 on himself, and it ain't gonna happen.

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768821 - 11/22/11 03:07 PM

I have stated MULTIPLE times that I am WELL AWARE the amount may go down, and that is that is what the court rules, there will be nothing else to do. I am not afraid of that. It is NOT ok for him to pay less, and if he wants to pay less then HE needs to do it.

I HONESTLY do not know if it will be lowered, increased or reaming the same. NONE of that matters, there is nothing I can do about it, but legally he needs to have it reviewed or pay the amount do - I do not know how you cannot see that?? My unwillingness, as you call it, to file is soley based on the facts - if he wants a review, if he is struggling financially it is his responsibility to take care of it - tell me I am wrong??

No I did not fill out the application, I called and spoke to them about it.

What is BAER??


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768822 - 11/22/11 03:10 PM

"if he wants a review, if he is struggling financially it is his responsibility to take care of it - tell me I am wrong??"

I AGREE that if HE wants a REVIEW, he has to file for it. What you cannot seem to GRASP is that if YOU want it ENFORCED, YOU need to file through CSE.

BAER=Big Assed Eye Roll

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768823 - 11/22/11 03:14 PM

Thank you Gr8Dad I feel as tho we are more in line now.

He wants a review and said he would file one, when he found out the work involved he tried to convince me to do it for him. Which I won't request a review for him.

You are right again that if I want his amount enforced, I will have to do something. I thought my only option was through court, but I will contact DCSE again and make sure I understood correctly.

I am sorry your ex hasn't paid, but even at 2/3 it isn't what is best for the child - that is what I am supposed to make sure he has.

thank you!


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gr8Dad
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768825 - 11/22/11 03:21 PM

First of all, it will require more than a PHONE CALL. You do NOT need a court order, it SPECIFICALLY states that MOST of the time it is done ADMINISTRATIVELY in the office. YOU have to fill out the request, he CANNOT DO IT. You can download the application, mail it to them and they will start the process.

As far as 2/3rds of the amount, he TOLD you he was having money trouble. He said he will (and HAS in the past) paid you the proper amount. So fill out the paperwork, apply for enforcement, and go from there.

--------------------
Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #768827 - 11/22/11 03:27 PM

[quote]"if he wants a review, if he is struggling financially it is his responsibility to take care of it - tell me I am wrong??"

I AGREE that if HE wants a REVIEW, he has to file for it. What you cannot seem to GRASP is that if YOU want it ENFORCED, YOU need to file through CSE.

BAER=Big Assed Eye Roll [/quote]

Ok maybe we HAVE been on the same page but confused; the whole point of me starting posts here has been to gather info to find out how to handle enforcement of payments.

I know I have to do it and I am trying to figure out how...I thought court was my only option, but I plan to call DCSE again thanks to this board!


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768828 - 11/22/11 03:34 PM

BAER=Big Assed Eye Roll

I love that and plan to start using it!! Thanks!


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Cassie23
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: hurryupwait]
      #768838 - 11/22/11 05:03 PM

As gr8 suggested you should start the process and fill out the application first. It will ask you for a copy of the court order, I understand the person you spoke with said you cannot use a circuit court order, BUT I would furnish that order. Start the process, it will cost nothing, but time and see what happens.

Once we filled out the application and gave them a copy of the order- they took care of the rest! We get $25/year deducted for their services. We can get online and look at how much the CP owes, how much they have paid and how much has been sent to us. They deduct the $25 fee right from the NCP's payment. So if you are getting $100/week- one week you may get $75. At the time of application it may ask you on whether the NCP is up to date in payments, etc. If they can only go through and garnish presently then at least that is a start.


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Avaya
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Re: Partial Child support payments [Re: gr8Dad]
      #769184 - 11/28/11 08:50 AM

AND with the number of NCP's NOT paying any amount at all, chances are that your receipt of 2/3 will put you on a back burner. They are likely to tell you to be happy you're getting something. May not be fair, but it's a good chance that is what will happen.

--------------------
Eternity is too long to be wrong.


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hurryupwait
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Re: Partial Child support payments - UPDATED [Re: Goodmom]
      #774538 - 01/16/12 02:58 PM

Hi all,

I wanted to say thank you for those of you who encouraged me to simply fill out the application with the division of child support enforcement, rather than go on what I was told in a single phone call.

I submitted my application for services which was accepted. I now have a case thought them. I am unsure of what the steps are...they must have sent my Ex a letter though, because I have received some awful ugly texts from him. I do not know if they are garnishing his wages, or indicating he needs to pay them directly...anyone know the steps on that?

Since I know G8tDad will ask, in my application I detailed the current child care situation as well!

It is nice to have a place to gather information and I appreciate the input from each of you!


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