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spinnerdegrassi
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: Debbie_L]
      #771878 - 12/21/11 01:40 PM

I liken that to the people who becomes sucesses with just HS diplomas. Sure they exist, and some obviously do very well. But they're the exception to the rule in this day and age, and for every success, you'll find 100 failures. Plus it depends on what state you're from. If the kids live in Arkansas, Tennessee, Mississippi, Alabama, Kentucky or West Virginia then getting married at 14 or marrying your cousin isn't that much out of the norm. But for the rest of the country it's generally frowned upon.

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Cassie23
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: javajunkiee]
      #771879 - 12/21/11 02:19 PM

If you're mature/strong enough to get married you should be mature/strong enough to not NEED (emphasis on need) your parents approval. If their approval is that crucial to the couple, they shouldn't get married.
-----------------------------------------------

I agree to extent, but I believe that everyone wants some sort of acceptance- whether it be your family, friends, work, etc. It would also be, to me, embarrassing that my parents chose to simply forgo being part of a special day to me because they don't agree with my decision to marry.

I didn't even read that Sadie's SD is throwing a hissy because her Dad has decided not to attend the wedding. For all we know she may be taking it well and in the end maybe she doesn't want people there who obviously disapprove to the extent that they do.


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LexieBelle
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: Cassie23]
      #771880 - 12/21/11 02:29 PM

Quote: "It would also be, to me, embarrassing that my parents chose to simply forgo being part of a special day to me"

---------->>> Yup, this too. I didn't actually have a "formal" wedding until I married dd's father. It was a pretty big deal/big event. And I was already having pregnancy complications (I was in the ER the night before with my "issue"). I only have my parents. So, I had NO family at my wedding. It was pretty sad that I had more love from my BAR friends. The "parent/child" typical dance? One of my good male friends danced with me while my ex danced with his mother. And it was funny, enormous black guy from the Bronx, father at 14 years old, HATES weddings, NEVER been to one. Mine's the only one. Two of my favorite pictures in my life (it's on my fb actually) are of him and I dancing. Don't have any of my dad and I dancing at a wedding and I honestly doubt if I did, the love/affection/happiness that my friend obviously has in our pics, my father would have.

Definitely learned over the years, and likely this girl will too.. family isn't necessarily the people you're born with, it's the people you find along the way that treat you like family and vice versa that count.


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Sadie
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: Cassie23]
      #771881 - 12/21/11 02:33 PM

Honestly Cassie, she is more upset that Dh is not forking over the money for her "Klienfelds" Say Yes to the Dress dress then who will be at her wedding. Right now it looks like the wedding will be quite small with a few friends, and bm and her family the only ones attending.

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ssmom79
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: Sadie]
      #771882 - 12/21/11 02:56 PM

Oh good, she can save money on the food and get her fancy dress then.

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Debbie_L
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: spinnerdegrassi]
      #771884 - 12/21/11 04:02 PM

I didn't say it was the "norm" for these things to work out - just that it can happen and I have examples from my own life. I'm in Canada, so not from any of the states you mentioned, lol. It isn't the usual situation to get married that early here either. I don't recommend it, I was just offering up some success stories.

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youngatheart
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: Miranda]
      #771887 - 12/21/11 05:03 PM

And then there are stories like my sisters bff who had a baby at 15, eventually married dad, had two more kids, finished school, became an RN, saw her kids through the horror of their father being killed in a tragic auto accident, and has continued to raise really great kids.

Or me, who got married at 18, had two kids, was married for ten years, and continues to coparent better than most still-married couples.

I'm not advocating marriages or babies at that or any other, just that it doesn't have to be anymore dramatic than people make it.


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M5M5
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: spinnerdegrassi]
      #771894 - 12/21/11 07:04 PM

That is the most idiotic statement Ive read on here in a while. I do not know ANYONE who has gotten married younger than 18 and I know no one that has married their cousin. And I'm from east TN.

Showing your prejudice and ignorance.

ETA: Don't know anyone that got married that young unless they are older than mud. My grandmother married at 17.

Edited by M5M5 (12/21/11 07:10 PM)


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spinnerdegrassi
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: M5M5]
      #771896 - 12/21/11 07:29 PM

How come you're the only one who didn't get the joke?

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Sadie
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Re: Hubby and I had a very interesting [Re: spinnerdegrassi]
      #771899 - 12/21/11 08:33 PM

Spinner, It must be a Tennessee thing,,LOL

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