lenamari3
recently joined
Reged: 12/27/11
Posts: 4
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My 22 - year old son plans to move with me when my divorce is final or when the family home is sold. He goes to school part-time and works part time. His father, my soon to be ex, is fixated on the notion that our son, occupying the same room in the home as he has since he was 15 must get out of the house for us to sell it. Between my son and his very sweet girlfriend, they earn maybe $800 a month. Did I mention my son is an insulin dependent diabetic? A great person, he has worked hard to improve the home and prepare it for sale, often performing improvement tasks that my soon to be ex husband refused to do. He has cleaned the entire place repeatedly when we had house showings and called him from work because we got a surprise visit. Unfortunately, I married a Narcissistic Personality Disorder who refuses to accept any logic or basis in reality, choosing instead to ONLY believe what he concocts in his own brain. And the truly horrific part is my son's well-concealed heartbreak over his own father telling him he needs to leave immediately. My attorney has said that as long as I'm in the home and own half of it (which, after 28 years of marriage, I do)that my son can legally remain in the home until a settlement is reached. True?? Thoughts???
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DedicatedDad
veteran
Reged: 09/05/04
Posts: 1318
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Who lives in the house now? Just him and his girlfriend, or are you there too?
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lenamari3
recently joined
Reged: 12/27/11
Posts: 4
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I'm here too. And once my daughter goes back to school in mid-January and if he's successful in kicking my son out, I'll be alone in the house with him in the middle of a divorce. Forgot to mention - the husband lives here too. refuses to leave eventhough he filed.
Edited by lenamari3 (12/27/11 10:59 AM)
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javajunkiee
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 3153
Loc: SC
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He cannot kick his son out of the house as long as you say he's allowed to stay. It sounds as if your stbx either thinks your son needs to grow up and forcing him out will encourage that, OR that your stbx resents that your son is clearly in your camp, and is seeking to punish him and remove your son's support of YOU at the same time. In any case, tough luck for your stbx.
Have you spoken to your atty about getting exclusive use of the home while the divorce is ongoing? If not, I'd suggest it. Divorce is hard enough without living under the same roof.
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Marriage doesn't come with a money-back guarantee.
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lenamari3
recently joined
Reged: 12/27/11
Posts: 4
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We are trying to expedite a settlement as quickly as possible, but today he is in contact with my stbx's attorney to try to get him to stop creating havoc in the household. And, yes, I'm pushing for him to move out of the house while the divorce is going on. He has a friend who has been out of work for two years. My stbx could easily occupy his finished basement and pay a little rent and it would help both households.
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DedicatedDad
veteran
Reged: 09/05/04
Posts: 1318
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The thing is, he has as much right to the home as you do. Why aren't you moving into a friend's basement? That would be his arguement...and from a legal sense, it's a legitimate one.
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lenamari3
recently joined
Reged: 12/27/11
Posts: 4
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Because when I go, I bring with me two labrador retrievers and half of 28 years (married - we've been together for 32 years)of living. I can't bring two labs into a friend's home. Perhaps I should clarify - neither one of us wants the home anymore. We were planning to move out anyway and the divorce has simply expedited it. In short, everyone will be moving out of the house, one way or another. And here's the other difference: I'm not the occupant that is threatening to throw his clothing into the driveway, which he is doing to me; I'm not the one that has alienated and bullied two kids; I'm not the party that has elected to make everyday of this process WORSE than the day before.
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Renny
addict
Reged: 09/24/11
Posts: 479
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If he throws something at you may get a restraining order. It's the way many of these situations are resolved where divorcing spouses are forced to live together.
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