gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30199
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Do you consider that when one parent does a majority of the "caring", the other parent does the majority of the EARNING? In a divorce, those roles are changed and each party learns new skills. To say that men who TRY to learn those skills are somehow wrong is sexist.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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LexieBelle
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/07/10
Posts: 3680
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You fail to grasp this was a choice made by HIM.
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DedicatedDad
veteran
Reged: 09/05/04
Posts: 1318
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I got the impression from your post you moved away and had have live in men. If so, those are your choices.
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LexieBelle
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/07/10
Posts: 3680
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Yes, I moved away. February of 2010. He left December 2006, not quite a year after dd was born, and about 9 months after she came home from the NICU.
Since he left, I've dated one person seriously and yes, we lived together.
My daughter actually spends MORE raw time with her father HERE, than she did when we lived TWO MILES away.
For the record, my ex, although he sued me to BLOCK the move (and really that was a show for his first wife and her boyfriend, the guy who was fvcking my ex's first wife when my ex was married to her), he has YET to take full advantage of the time we agreed to.
For the record, even though he gets a VERY sizeable child support reduction (50% savings on base, and NO add ons...no medical, no childcare, nothing), last year he fvcked with child support 6 out of 12 months (sorry, 2010).
it is what it is.. and this move was THE best thing to happen to dd, and to me. it is what it is. We had NO life where we were. We are only 100 miles away. It's not a big deal. She has a normal EOWE divorced child schedule now. She loves her father, but she knows who takes care of her. And it ain't him.
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DedicatedDad
veteran
Reged: 09/05/04
Posts: 1318
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I'll right. I'll leave it alone.
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30199
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Exactly. So if your daughter had a father who WAS active and WANTED to spend 50% of the time with her, she would adapt to it.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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LexieBelle
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/07/10
Posts: 3680
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That would be a good idea :):)
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LexieBelle
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/07/10
Posts: 3680
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If that were the case there wouldn't be a "need" to "adapt" it just would have been what it was.
My former stepdaughter didn't need to 'adapt' to a 50/50 deal, it just was that way. by his choice. I guess that's my position.. either you get what you what and you make it happen, up front, or you live with the consequences of your choices.
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30199
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Yes, a child going through a divorce WOULD have to adapt to a new situation.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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LexieBelle
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 11/07/10
Posts: 3680
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I suppose.. I think some of that though depends on age and the situation PRIOR to the divorce.
Like, for my daughter, her father and I only resided together for 9 months of her life. She was born, spent 3 months in the NICU, came home, and he left 9 months later. Less than 9 months. She was under a year when he left.
In those 9 months, we RARELY were home together. The last 5 months, I worked 10 hours a day, commuted anywhere from 3 to 8 hours a day. He worked overnights.
I'm very happy with where she is in terms of "adjustment"..
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