javajunkiee
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 3158
Loc: SC
|
|
Just kidding. I think. No really just kidding.... sigh.
Mr. 17 has been banned from driving and is grounded. Dad went into the storage compartments of the pickup last night looking for a bungie cord. One of the compartments was locked, so dad opens it with his key. He finds 3 unopened cans of beer and a pile of empties. Dad goes into sons room, livid, and asks him about it. Kids response was "it's just something I like to do". Seriously - he said that. Then SS17 follows up with "you drank in high school. Whats the big deal?".
Okayyyy, after setting SS17 straight about what dad did and didn't do in hs, he pointed out that SS KNEW that drinking underage, let alone that drinking while driving is unacceptable, dad stripped him of his driving privileges and grounded him indefinitely.
Dad is mad, disappointed and scared for SS, who turns 18 in May. SS is mad because he got busted and dad is giving him consequences.
This morning SS17 was supposed to catch a ride to school with his best friend that lives next door. Once again, he got up LATE so friend left without him. (So sorry there bud, but now you know how it feels when you've ditched your younger brother when he's running down the porch steps to catch you.) So dad is driving SS15 to school this morning and SS17 has to ride with them (he got the seat of shame - the backseat, lol. You snooze you lose).
Dad asks him where he got the beer, SS17 says someone bought it and he bought it off of them. Dad pointed out that it's illegal for him to be in possession of alcohol. SS says guys drink - its no big deal.
Dad explains how much trouble he could get in if stopped. SS17 says he's been stopped alot of times (!!!) and nothing ever happens and besides the cops need a warrant to search your car. Dad points out how many times SS has seen people sitting on the side of the road while cops are searching a car.
Dad then changes the subject before he blows a vein, and SS continues to sulk and be pissed off because Mr. Big Man On Campus With The Dad Who Doesn't Know Sh*t is treating him like a little kid and driving him to school.
This child..... are ALL 17yo males this convinced of their invincibility and superiority? I swear to God that if they are I'm moving out when the 15yo gets to this age.
One thing I know for sure? SS17 is absolutely NOT driving that specific truck again until its out of my name. It probably wouldn't matter one iota as far as liability at this point since dad and I are married, but its the principle. I'm realistic enough to understand that at 17 kids are going to push the envelope and at least experiment with drinking. But his arrogance? over-confidence? that he could drink in that truck scares me and ticks.me.off. I don't trust him any farther than I can throw him at this point.
--------------------
Marriage doesn't come with a money-back guarantee.
|
Cassie23
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 10/07/05
Posts: 14714
|
|
The best thing we ever did was put a GPS tracker on our vehicle when SD was using it. The FIRST day no less than 2 hours after giving her the vehicle with the tracker and going over the rules, she broke the rules. RIDICULOUS. This was when SD was 19. So I don't have an answer- these kids, the ones that haven't had structure and continual discipline and consequences, yes, they think they are indestructible.
Regardless the GPS can set up a wide variety of parameters. If they go over a specific speed limit or go outside the "boundaries" you set, etc. you sent notification by text or email. I received a text every time the engine turned on or off. It was a great and, I believe given the circumstances, a NECESSARY item.
|
LeAnne
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 08/18/05
Posts: 10232
Loc: missouri
|
|
So I don't have an answer- these kids, the ones that haven't had structure and continual discipline and consequences, yes, they think they are indestructible. Quote
Just say'in..Hope you don't eat your words on that one Cassie.
They all pretty much push the envelope at some point and time.
Just like the dad who brought his kid the fancy old camaro. Dad's words...MY KID IS RESPONSIBLE. Yup he sure is...he was responsible to get a speeding ticket doing 129 mph last week.
Kids can be the apple of their parents eye, when they are in their parents view, but let them out of your sight...Hmmmm. You really have no clue what they are doing?
Beer..Booze..most teens go through that.
And the ones who appear to be the apple, dig deep enough and I am betting you could find some rotten parts in that perfect apple.
Just glad i don't have to go through the teen years anymore.
--------------------
Empty Nesting
|
youngatheart
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 09/03/05
Posts: 9400
|
|
Could you pm me the info on the gps tracker you used?
|
Reilly
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/05/05
Posts: 3376
Loc: right here ----->
|
|
*Sings*
"Welcome to my world...."
"are ALL 17yo males this convinced of their invincibility and superiority?"
The short answer is....yes...
--------------------
Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?~Marilyn Monroe
|
Reilly
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/05/05
Posts: 3376
Loc: right here ----->
|
|
[quote]The best thing we ever did was put a GPS tracker on our vehicle when SD was using it. The FIRST day no less than 2 hours after giving her the vehicle with the tracker and going over the rules, she broke the rules. RIDICULOUS. This was when SD was 19. So I don't have an answer- these kids, the ones that haven't had structure and continual discipline and consequences, yes, they think they are indestructible.
Regardless the GPS can set up a wide variety of parameters. If they go over a specific speed limit or go outside the "boundaries" you set, etc. you sent notification by text or email. I received a text every time the engine turned on or off. It was a great and, I believe given the circumstances, a NECESSARY item. [/quote]
There are just some things I don't need to know..
EVERY kid pushes the limits...you can't micromanage every.little.thing and have any sanity in your life...
It would make me crazy to receive a text every time the engine went on or off..
Lack of structure and discipline have absolutely nothing to do with teenage curiosity and peer pressure..nothing...all that crap goes out the window, when your buddies are cruisin' back roads with a 12 pack of Bud Light, swapped from someone's dad or big brother...
I find the drinking and driving to be a big enough offense to do what JJ's DH did..THAT is a huge risk...but driving outside "set" parameters? That's just a little too controlling for me...
--------------------
Ever notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?~Marilyn Monroe
|
LeAnne
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 08/18/05
Posts: 10232
Loc: missouri
|
|
and if you make them get a job, pay their own gas, insurance and repairs...they won't have any money for beer and they won't be out cruising everywhere because they don't have the money for gas.
--------------------
Empty Nesting
|
javajunkiee
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 3158
Loc: SC
|
|
We've got onstar on the smaller truck but not on the one the kid has been driving. We're going to talk more about SS tonight, and that's one of the things I'll mention to him.
DH has always set expectations for behavior with both the boys, but if there wasn't something blatantly wrong he assumed absolutely *nothing* was wrong. That makes it easy for a kid to be sneaky. He's always thought the oldest was smarter and stronger than to think doing this crap was ok; he's found out the hard way that SS is more typical than he realized.
--------------------
Marriage doesn't come with a money-back guarantee.
|
LeAnne
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 08/18/05
Posts: 10232
Loc: missouri
|
|
Why would you need a GPS?
--------------------
Empty Nesting
|
javajunkiee
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 3158
Loc: SC
|
|
That's yet one more thing that gets under my skin. SS wouldn't work during football season. Daily practices, homework, okay... I get it. After football dad told him to get a job and he drug his feet but finally did it. He's not getting a lot of hours so he nickels and dimes dad for gas money.
Then Christmas comes and he gets $$ from the grandparents and from us, and proceeds to go out and buy clothes and shoes, and STILL bug us for $$ because he's run one or the other vehicle down past E.
I started balking shortly after Christmas when I knew he had $200 cash, plus his paycheck and he was still bugging for $ for gas. My point was that if he'd quit blowing his $ on clothes and shoes and playing chauffeur for everyone else he'd have gas money. Guess he had one more expense he forgot to mention.
I *get* pushing the envelope at that age. I really do; I may not like it or approve of it, but I'm not as naive to believe it doesn't happen. But alcohol within 20ft of that truck? of any truck? that he's driving?
HAYLL.NO.
Pushing the envelope has consequences, but crossing THAT line?
Kid can ride his bike to school as far as I'm concerned. His ego needs a reality check.
--------------------
Marriage doesn't come with a money-back guarantee.
|
Previous
Index
Next
Threaded
Edit
Reply
Quote
