Goodmom
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/17/07
Posts: 2009
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[quote]And forget "other species." I am not an animal. Neither is my child. Or her mother. [/quote]
Um, all humans are animals.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human
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Eve
member
Reged: 11/28/05
Posts: 112
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Renny......Your 2nd paragraph,"I'd say the mother-child bond......" is correct.
Dadinva......If you are not an animal....then maybe you are a plant, or a rock....or bacteria? Sorry, bub.....You are an animal! Again..reading and researching would help some people here!
Edited by Eve (01/20/12 05:59 PM)
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30195
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Well, you STILL didn't answer my question. Since you feel women should be entitled to a greater share of the parenting time due to biological differences that cause them great emotional strain when separated from the child, what RIGHTS are you willing to have women give up because of this inability to control their biological condition? I mean should new mothers be barred from voting, due to their inability to act properly because of that biological difference?
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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annieo
veteran
Reged: 07/07/10
Posts: 1410
Loc: Pacific Northwest
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Huh?? And I thought it was what is in the best interest of the child NOT a parent. The parent needs to suck it up buttercup because he/she is NOT the focus THE child is and it is best for the child to spend equal time with each parent (not in abuse scenarios) to bond and have equal input with EACH parent.
Would I WANT to hand my child over and be away no but it isn't about me it is about the CHILD.
There are a significant amount of studies available where is is BEST for the child to be with both parents and share equal time with both. I know several men who cannot stand to be away from their child(ren) as much as you are stating a woman is affected. Women and men have different hormones (obviously) but men can feel the same way it may not be as hormonal but the feeling sick etc... when being away from their child(ren) can be and in many cases is as strong a feeling. I also know women who feel/felt nothing for the child regardless of hormones etc...
You are making females out to be unstable, neurotic, my way or the highway - you are making females out to be weak...
btw - there are MANY educated people here and quite frankly Eve, you are the one coming across as uneducated.
I would like to see your answers to Gr8's questions.
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Eve
member
Reged: 11/28/05
Posts: 112
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No, Annieo,....YOU are making females out to be unstable, neurotic, and weak because you THINK they are when they feel what they are SUPPOSE to feel. It is easy to throw around labels to keep women from admiting how they feel.
gr8Dad........This is not about "rights". It should be about finding ways to make a smooth transition to 50-50 if that is desired, working WITH a strong maternal bond and understanding, and APPRECIATING the chemistry that goes along with that and how it can HELP your child in later years, WITHOUT building animosity between the parents, and at the same time letting the father have a great amount of parenting time with his baby/ toddler. To force a new mom to give up her 6, 7, or 8 month old for days at a time, is stupid and makes no sense. All it does is cause trouble and ill will, and mom gets labeled "crazy and unstable".
New fathers should see and parent their babies and toddlers and spend time with them every day if possible, and I would bet moms would be fine with that. There is not much more that can be said on this topic. Some of the people here "get it" and some just don't.
Edited by Eve (01/22/12 05:18 PM)
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30195
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Well, wouldn't you agree that an individual who is biologically destined to certain actions, they should never be in positions during which they would be forced to action in direct opposition to that course of action? Everyone has good and bad feelings. We are supposed to function normally regardless. Allowing them to control you is irresponsible. Welcome to adulthood.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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M5M5
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/29/05
Posts: 11722
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We get feelings. What we DON'T get is...putting ourselves before our child...which is what you are saying we should do. You said, "To force a new mom to give up her 6, 7, or 8 month old for days at a time, is stupid and makes no sense". Yet you want the father to be willing to give up that time? Who CARES about the parents feelings...it's about what is best for the CHILD. I think YOU are the one not getting it.
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DedicatedDad
veteran
Reged: 09/05/04
Posts: 1318
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"To force a new mom to give up her 6, 7, or 8 month old for days at a time, is stupid and makes no sense."
Considering my ex didn't get up with the kids at night and hated to feed or change them, they would be dead if I had to follow your advice.
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Goodmom
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 06/17/07
Posts: 2009
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[quote]This is not about "rights". It should be about finding ways to make a smooth transition to 50-50 if that is desired, working WITH a strong maternal bond and understanding, and APPRECIATING the chemistry that goes along with that [/quote]
So that we are clear here, I am not an advocate for the presumption of 50/50 physical.
Your argument has flaws and is not helping your case at all (and, really, there's not much you can do with this crowd because to them it isn't about the child, but about the father's rights). I know that hormone that you are talking about. It is to insure the survival of the human species. It's more prevalent in the women who choose to breastfeed. And, no, men don't have this particular hormone released, but then it isn't their bodies that is producing the food for the newborn.
And it doesn't last more than a few months. You are acting like it lasts to who knows when. It doesn't.
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Eve
member
Reged: 11/28/05
Posts: 112
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Like I said, some just don't......and sadly, never will.
Edited by Eve (01/23/12 11:24 PM)
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