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wijobode
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Reged: 04/25/12
Posts: 2
How to handle this situation
      #783721 - 04/25/12 04:27 AM

This happens to be a complicated situation and needs gloves to hand this. Some back ground information for you. I am currently deployed to another country. We both live in NC and I have been gone for 4 months now. Recently I have 2 of her friends saying she has cheated on me and are no longer her friends because of disagreements. She has started seeing men she has been chatting with online. She even has been talking about doing sexual things to these men online. She doesn't deny no agree to any of my questions of her actions. She says she wants a divorce and wants to get as much as she can from me cause she wants to leave this marriage with something. What can I do knowing what she has done? She is also be diagnosed by a pshycologist with having multiple personality disorder. What to do?

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elliesmom
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Reged: 11/07/05
Posts: 8839
Re: How to handle this situation [Re: wijobode]
      #783742 - 04/25/12 01:49 PM

Do you have any children?

#1 DO NOT SLEEP WITH HER AGAIN. Because, ew. And it will negate any claim you have to a divorce due to adultery.

#2 She will likely get 1/2 of everything acquired during the marriage. Including the debt. That is just how it works.

#3 Depending on how long you were married, she may get some spousal support.

If you have internet/phone access you might be able to consult with an attorney in NC to see what s/he recommends.

--------------------
Forgiveness is...letting go of the hope that the past can be changed.


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wijobode
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Reged: 04/25/12
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Re: How to handle this situation [Re: elliesmom]
      #783765 - 04/26/12 01:39 AM

We have only been married for a year now. She has made a verbal claim she has done a threesome. I know facts someone cant deny but just saying it to piss someone of is another. I want to be able to run with what she said but I have no other proof. We have no children.

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elliesmom
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Reged: 11/07/05
Posts: 8839
Re: How to handle this situation [Re: wijobode]
      #783782 - 04/26/12 11:00 AM

For a marriage of only a year - it won't matter. She isn't going to get alimony or much of anything. The WORST thing I can imagine is you might be ordered to pay her moving expenses back home if she moved to be with you.

Just get a lawyer, file irreconciliable differences and be done with it. I would speak to whomever you are supposed to about these things, your chief or whatever your branch calls it, to find out how much money you have to give her and then cut the rest off. Change your passwords (mypay etc.) change your direct deposit to a new bank acct in your name only and take your name off of any joint account. You might want to flag your credit file so she can't open new accounts in your name. Generally once you file for divorce - any account she opens is HER problem. So if you can get a lawyer to represent you in NC who can get the ball rolling - not a bad idea.

--------------------
Forgiveness is...letting go of the hope that the past can be changed.


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