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JudyD
recently joined


Reged: 01/20/05
Posts: 2
more and more frustrated
      #7873 - 01/20/05 08:20 AM

Hi everyone!

Hope all of you are well. I'm new here. Thought i'd vent a bit. Hope you don't mind. Short and sweet I'm separated over a year and a half. 2 little girls. My ex has decided that he needs full custody because i am dating someone. The evaluator thinks he should have custody JUST because i'm dating someone. OH btw the someone is the only man i am dating, Is a blue collar professional with a very deep love for my children. My ex, on the other hand has a restraining order for thrreatening to kill me. Anyhow, it's just a mess and I need someone to tell me things will be ok. Oh and for the record, I'm the only parent they've ever lived with, don't drink, don't smoke, never tried drugs, raised 8 kids and i run a preschool.

j


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sparky
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Reged: 11/16/04
Posts: 289
Re: more and more frustrated [Re: JudyD]
      #7874 - 01/20/05 09:02 AM

"The evaluator thinks he should have custody JUST because i'm dating someone."

First, I am sorry to hear of your situation and am shocked as well.
You went through an evaluation, what was it like?
I am requesting one next week due to my ex's mental and drug problems.
I assume they will evaluate me also and want to know what to expect.
I've done my research, but like to hear first hand what it is like.
I'd appreciate any info.

PS. Also who pays for the evaluation and what is the cost?

Edited by sparky (01/20/05 09:07 AM)


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almostheaven
Carpal \'Tunnel
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Reged: 07/13/04
Posts: 10468
Loc: West Virginia
Court appointed evaluator?... [Re: JudyD]
      #7899 - 01/20/05 01:26 PM

Courts *generally* go with their advice unless their advice shows to be totally biased. And if all you've given here is pretty much how it's gone, it's so totally over the top biased, that unless the judge is a total jackass, they would not go with that evaluator's advice. Dating someone is NOT a crime. However....

If it's a worry, then stop seeing this person. If he cares for you, he'll wait until this is all over.

--------------------
Char Fox


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JudyD
recently joined


Reged: 01/20/05
Posts: 2
Re: Court appointed evaluator?... [Re: almostheaven]
      #8779 - 02/05/05 03:14 PM

the evaluation was generally painless. I spent about 6 hours there. one hour sessions then he interviewed my children, mom and boyfriend. I don't really know who he questioned on the exes side. The final cost was close to 10K and my ex paid for it since he makes 97 times what i do. It took about 7 months from start to finish and now since it was so off i had to hire a forensic evaluator to rip the first report apart. i still don't have a final bill on that and it's gonna be on me. Then it is 1100 bucks to depose the first guy and 325 bucks for a copy of his report and his notes. I hope you have better luck with it than i did. Mine sucks!

As for my situation...we found so many holes in the report that my lawyer is looking forward to the deposotion. (I think) I'm confident that it will be excluded and hopefully my ex will finally give up the control problem and let me and the kids have a life that will be healthy. Hope everyone is well...chat soon


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