c_jane
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 04/06/07
Posts: 1759
Loc: In the Great State of Texas
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Back in October I bought DS a car. It's in MY name and I pay the insurance on it (for now).
Earlier this summer Exhole said he was paying for DS to take Drivers Ed and would it be a problem for me getting him to the classes during my time? Which it wasn't.
DS completed the lessons and now just has scheduled driving time with the school and practice with a driver over 21 in the car. He got his learners permit the 2nd week of class.
When he was at Exhole's they wanted the car over there so (1)Exhole could do a few mechanical/electrical things to it that needed to be done, and (2) so DS could drive the car around with his Dad and get used to 'his' car. Both were OK with me.
One day Exhole called and asked me if he could drive the car to his work because his truck needed a new radiator and something was also the matter with SM's Blazer. So I said OK just for that ONE day. DS said his Dad ordered the parts and fixed the truck that night. No problem there.
So DS is over at Dad's again and the Jeep is over there too. I was going out to get the mail and I saw STEPMOM driving the Jeep by my house!! I called DS to verify that he was NOT in the car and had NOT given her permission to drive it wherever. He was at home and didn't know a thing about it.
I told him I was coming to get the keys (they had the spare set too -- long story) because she was NOT to be driving the Jeep. I had to WALK over there so I could get the Jeep, which she proceeded to first try to explain it away and then cussed me out in the driveway and THREW the keys at me. (DS told me Exhole's truck's in the shop again and he drove the Blazer to work).
I called Exhole and left him a message that I was getting the Jeep. He told me it was all a misunderstanding and DS was SUPPOSED to drive SM to the grocery store but SM 'forgot' to ask him to drive her. Forgot my AZZ!! How do you get in SOMEONE ELSE'S CAR and *forget* to ask them to drive you???
Anyway, NOW DS has texted me that Exhole has taken away his Learner's Permit so he can't drive anymore. REAL mature RIGHT? I don't care if he's not allowed to drive THEIR vehicles (which I also think is childish but whatever) but to take it away entirely??
Now I have to investigate getting DS a replacement Learners Permit to keep at my house <sigh>. Exhole is such an..... Exhole.
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John Constantine: God's a kid with an ant farm.... He's not planning anything.
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30386
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"When he was at Exhole's they wanted the car over there so (1)Exhole could do a few mechanical/electrical things to it that needed to be done, and (2) so DS could drive the car around with his Dad and get used to 'his' car. Both were OK with me."
So you are okay with Dad WORKING on the car, got it.
"One day Exhole called and asked me if he could drive the car to his work because his truck needed a new radiator and something was also the matter with SM's Blazer. So I said OK just for that ONE day. DS said his Dad ordered the parts and fixed the truck that night. No problem there."
So you were okay with using the car in an sort of emergency situation, Dad needed to get to work. Got it.
"I told him I was coming to get the keys (they had the spare set too -- long story) because she was NOT to be driving the Jeep. I had to WALK over there so I could get the Jeep, which she proceeded to first try to explain it away and then cussed me out in the driveway and THREW the keys at me. (DS told me Exhole's truck's in the shop again and he drove the Blazer to work)."
So she TRIED to explain it, but you were having not part of THAT, right? I would have thrown more than the KEYS at you.
"I called Exhole and left him a message that I was getting the Jeep. He told me it was all a misunderstanding and DS was SUPPOSED to drive SM to the grocery store but SM 'forgot' to ask him to drive her. Forgot my AZZ!! How do you get in SOMEONE ELSE'S CAR and *forget* to ask them to drive you???"
Um, maybe she couldn't FIND him, maybe Dad said take his car to the store, she thought just take the CAR, Dad meant get the kid to drive, there are a number of valid reasons.
"Anyway, NOW DS has texted me that Exhole has taken away his Learner's Permit so he can't drive anymore. REAL mature RIGHT?"
Well, YOU want the KID to have SOLE control, regardless of what DAD or STEP MOM says, I would cut that sh!t out real fast as well, and taking the permit is the easiest way.
"I don't care if he's not allowed to drive THEIR vehicles (which I also think is childish but whatever) but to take it away entirely??"
He probably had to EXCLUDE the child as a driver to keep his insurance from SKYROCKETING. Tell me, you said the car and insurance is in YOUR name, does the insurance comapny know that a PERMITTED FIFTEEN year old is driving the car? I mean is the child SPECIFICALLY added to the policy?
"Now I have to investigate getting DS a replacement Learners Permit to keep at my house <sigh>. Exhole is such an..... Exhole."
Honestly, after everything you have done to him, if I was him, I would do WHATEVER was in my power to make your life a living HELL.
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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c_jane
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 04/06/07
Posts: 1759
Loc: In the Great State of Texas
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Ho-hum (yawn).
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John Constantine: God's a kid with an ant farm.... He's not planning anything.
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gr8Dad
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/07/04
Posts: 30386
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LOL, not gonna point out that no one else CARES about your SELF CREATED situation enough to comment on it, LMAO!
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Why give a "senior" discount, they have had plenty of time to raise the money...
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Avaya
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 02/09/06
Posts: 9824
Loc: Arkansas
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Maybe he's an exhole or maybe you're too uptight. It's a car, big deal SM drove it. If you wanted to 'control' it, you should have kept it at your house.
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Eternity is too long to be wrong.
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ssmom79
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/27/07
Posts: 7806
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Pretty sure you can't have two Learner's permits based on the fact parents can't get along. Also the fact it's been 'taken away' doesn't negate it's existence.
(clarification) Back in the day, that would make me HOT HOT HOT! The only way to control that is to keep the car at your home. We let SS take his truck wherever he goes. If his mom drives it and wrecks it, it's on her. I used to care what they did....now, not so much. The kids are alive, fed, live in a nice home....they're fine.
It was a bad idea to let your ex drive the vehicle at all.
If they want to punish him in that way, it's on them.
Edited by ssmom79 (07/26/12 10:03 AM)
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Sadie
addict
Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 567
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I can understand why C. jane feels that way. Sm had no business touching a car that C.Jane is paying for. That is one of the reasons we never helped sd with a car.
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kkimberh
enthusiast
Reged: 03/24/10
Posts: 391
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Also, considering C.Jane is paying for the insurance on that car, and SM is NOT on that insurance, it could cause all kinds of problems for her if SM wreaks it. Seriously, she had NO business driving that car and I can completely understand why CJane is so bent out of shape. She has good reason.
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I love therapy. It's like a talk show, where I'm the guest and the only topic is me.
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ssmom79
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/27/07
Posts: 7806
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The policy follows the car not the person driving the car. My BM's ex-fiance's son, who didn't live in the home and didn't carry insurance coverage, wrecked the ex-fiance's car and insurance covered the car. They did not cover the driver's injuries, but they did cover the car.
However, as the owner of the car, CJ has the right to determine who drives her car and who cannot drive her car. They should respect that or expect her not to provide the car.
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youngatheart
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 09/03/05
Posts: 9400
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I can see both sides of this.
On one side, there is no way that my kid is going to have a vehicle that I have to ask permission to use, or for my spouse to use.
On the other side, if ex or his/her spouse has a bad driving history, I don't want them driving a vehicle I insure.
I get that you don't like your ex or his spouse. But, in general, I don't get being butt-hurt over SM taking the car to the store.
Regarding the permit, dad is being ridiculous. Regarding the car, mom is being ridiculous.
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