NYSgirl
recently joined
Reged: 01/23/13
Posts: 2
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My husband of 13 years left us (myself & 2 kids) last May for another woman w/kids. We reside in the marital home and he walked away from all financial responsibilities. He was the primary breadwinner ($60k) while I've only worked part-time the length of the marriage ($11k). We are currently in family court over custody and support. I currently have physical custody and he only has theraputic visitation (which he has not exercised.) Our boys want nothing to do with him, which is unfortunate because he was the perfect father to them before this skank came into his life.
Today at our first Support hearing his lawyer served me with divorce papers (i did not have a lawyer). As i am struggling horribly financially I find this a daunting challenge to try to find $3k to retain an attorney to answer this petition. Yes - i have a call into Legal Aid but i do not anticipate any help as they view our house as an asset even though it's headed into foreclosure.
I find it astonishing that a man can walk away from his children & financial obligations and go play house with another without any remorse. My biggest problem is that he is self-employed and I have limited access to his records (he under-reports almost half his income.)
My GOAL is to take him for all he's worth (he's given an engagement ring to new gf and is taking her on a Carib cruise and he never even bothered to acknowledge the boys xmas or bdays). Not only do I want significant spousal & child support but I'm hoping to STALL this divorce for as long as possible as an exit "eff u" to him. Does anyone have any good tactics to help me accomplish these goals???
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c_jane
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 04/06/07
Posts: 1759
Loc: In the Great State of Texas
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If you KNOW he reports only 1/2 his income, my first call would be to the IRS. They will audit him to the Nth degree. Even if he doesn't have to pay any back taxes, the hassle alone would be worth it!!
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John Constantine: God's a kid with an ant farm.... He's not planning anything.
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Debi
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 06/03/05
Posts: 7139
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Except she may have to explain why she didn't report it before. (Oh yeah it was benefiting her then) and if there are back taxes she would be responsible for part of them as they are married. (Or would have been married during the tax years she knows about)
She said he's self employed not that he "owns a business" so I'm guessing he doesn't do business taxes
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When we were together, you said you'd die for me. Now, I think it's time you kept your promise.
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Renny
addict
Reged: 09/24/11
Posts: 479
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More important than the fact that you were served -- since you showed up at the hearing and that was a logical place to serve you -- is what happened at the support hearing? Your immediate goal should be to get temporary support in the form of child support, alimony, mortgage, and more. in general, file an answer and counterclaim and set a near date for a real support hearing or temporary hearing. Also, getting a lawyer now and possibly legal fees is highly advisable, rather than getting one later when you have to fix things that are messed up now.
You are understandably in revenge mode at the moment. I would however focus on the legal practicalities, like ascertaining his income through discovery, including records of past expenses and purchases, mortgage payments, cars, etc. you probably have more information than you realize.
Sorry you found your way here.
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