mikeskids
recently joined
Reged: 05/27/07
Posts: 1
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Hi all,
I'm new here so I hope all can help on this subject. My soon to be ex-wife met someone through online dating. 4 days later she's spending the night there with my 10 and 12 year children. That was a month ago and has been staying there with my kids every weekend and all week except one day a week. Isn't this a little soon?
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BeachBabeRN
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 01/16/06
Posts: 3031
Loc: VA for 21 years, NC forever!
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Too soon? That holds the record for warp speed.
There is NO way on this earth that I'd tolerate that -- living together in a committed relationship is one thing, I could live with that....but consistently staying over at his house?
Nope, no way.
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Relayer
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 03/13/07
Posts: 9506
Loc: Moorglade Mover
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My ex did the same exact thing..only, she did it for over a year before the guy even filed for divorce
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GO CUBBIES!!!!
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1004SRS
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 12/11/06
Posts: 5044
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I have recently started dating someone that I've known for a while. I have stayed at his house, but only when I don't have the kids.
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CiCi
addict
Reged: 03/28/07
Posts: 493
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I would tell your ex that this is really not in the best interest of the kids and that if she wants to pursue a relationship, she can do so when the children are with you. I would be beyond irate and for me, this is something I'd consider taking her back to court on. There are some things I am willing to be flexible on, but when it comes to what is in the best interest of the kids and their emotional stability, it's one area I refuse to compromise.
Try to put your foot down on this one if you can (without causing an upset to the kids).
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Remember: A clean house is the sign of a wasted life.
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jil_stevens
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 07/31/06
Posts: 3893
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Way too soon if she is your stbx...not even divorced then no overnight guests, I would say! I agree that it is fine in a long-term, committed relationship, but otherwise, no.
I live with my BF, but we were dating for a while before hand, and really the only reason we aren't married is because we are both happy with things this way. So it is definitely a long-term relationship, heck we've lived together for two years!
As for introducing, it wasn't an issue cuz the kids knew him before I did...his son and my son were good friends from daycare, then SO moved into the same apartment building as we did, by coincidence, and the kids were overjoyed and started playing together daily. Things just went from there 
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focusedon2
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 12/10/05
Posts: 2136
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Quote:
4 days later she's spending the night
This guy hit the jackpot, it seems.
It's to soon for HER to spend the night there. It's nearly criminal for her to take her children.
Why bother locking you doors at night? Just put a sign on it that says "always open and looking for a good time"?
But please send the kids to Dad's house before you do it.
Now before someone says I am a moral prude (which I might be) this is not about morality, it's about safety. Her behavior is unsafe, plain and simple.
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Relayer
Carpal \'Tunnel
Reged: 03/13/07
Posts: 9506
Loc: Moorglade Mover
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Quote:
I have recently started dating someone that I've known for a while. I have stayed at his house, but only when I don't have the kids.
1004: No, my ex was staying at her boyfriends house before he filed for divorce WITH my kids...for well over a year..
I think it shows a real lack of judgement, don't you?
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GO CUBBIES!!!!
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Jsands200
recently joined
Reged: 07/28/06
Posts: 24
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I am curious as to how the kids are reacting to this? Do they have their own rooms and beds there too? That is extremely strange. ANd your STBX having met this guy through online dating must be the most uncomfortable situation possible for you. She should definitely be leaving them with you if she wants to see this other man.
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Pro Divorce Advice for Men
www.secretdivorce.com
Pay little or no alimony, and CS
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c_hugh
recently joined
Reged: 06/06/07
Posts: 4
Loc: kansas
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I have to agree from a safety stand point on having the children there. How long had she known him before having the children over there and yes I would be furious.
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http://stopthepainofdivorce.com
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